Is this HOCD or am I in denial???

[cece_jome]

I am a teenager worried about turning lesbian/bi. It started when my mom asked if I was gay, becuz I went up and bit her arm. I very mad because we're very close and she's even admitted that she would bit people when she was young (I'm nit joking about this b.t.w, I've always done this since i was young). My anxiety also triggered when I watch a coming out video of one of the youtubers and started questioning if that could be me too. Since then, I've been worried and a little anxious that I could be gay. I have nothing against homosexuals. I just prefer the Hetero lifestyle. Since I was young, I've always liked and fantasized about guys and never questioned my sexuality. I believe my family would accept me if I was gay, even though it wud be hard. I keep checking on the web to see if this is normal, and found i could be suffering from HOCD.I believe i have it, but i worry i could be in denial. Sometimes I watch porn and have felt aroused to lesbian porn, but i also get aroused by other porn.I've taken many sexuality quizzes and all my results were Hetersexual. My mind constantly thinks I could be lesbian, which I don't get nervous about anymore (it worries me that I don't get nervous about that), but I do feel uncomfortable and feel the need to push it out of my head. Sometimes, I feel like the way I sit or talk is gay, or if I dress a certain way, I feel the need to change it. I don't believe being a lesbian fits me, and if I happened to be with a girl, i would end up feeling more like friends than lovers.My family says I have a tendency to worry about stuff. Im nervous because I'm not as panicky like I use to be, and fear this is me accepting myself as a homosexual when i don't want that. I am currently crushing on a boy but I don't have intense feelings for him or get nervous around him which concerns me because I've read that other lesbians or bi people have dated guys in the past but haven't had intense feelings for them. Before this all happened, I was never concerned about this and my feelings for boys were so intense, but now my sex drive has kinda decreased. Let me emphasize that I hope this is something else and not me actually in denial of my homosexuality. The thing is being straight feels natural too me and I probably know deep down that I'm straight but my mind is trying to convince me that I'm not. Please be nice about it. I'm really worried!

[cece_jome]

Thank you everyone... I am straight, I know am I since it's just more natural for me., but gotten to the point where I've obsessed so much about it and let it take over my life. No more! I'm done. I know who I am -a straight heter teen - and nothing or no one is going to tell me otherwise. Again , thanks so much.
*sorry for the grammatical errors... I was typing fast

[Paxiled]

What I always say about this isn't too different from the above with one caveat -- I don't believe there is such as thing as HOCD.  It's just a label that helps psychologists and psychiatrists get insurance coverage for treating you and helps drug companies market their drugs, but there are people who obsess over all kinds of things.  It's not the label that's important, it's that obsessing over it is bothering you and affecting your life adversely.  As Lightseeker says, it doesn't matter what your sexuality is, but when you question it to the point of disrupting your life, especially given you seem to be hetero in every way, that shows some insecurity inside you.  This is really common for teenagers, and it hits most teenagers at some point.  This is your time for it.  I would look into finding a nonjudgmental professional to talk to so you can ease your mind over it and learn to stop obsessing -- this can become a chronic problem and you don't want that.  So don't focus so much on what the obsession is, it could just as easily been your ethnicity or your hair as sexuality -- it's the obsessing that's really bothering you, not whether you're gay or not.  Peace.

[TheLightSeeker]

Hi cece_jome!
Trust your gut feeling and intuition!
So if that feeling and intuition is saying straight, that's what
you probably are!
You might be overthinking this issue, but again it could be a certain trait of a HOCD variant, where you may have little control over these thoughts.
The good news is that you are -in the grand scheme of things-a spiritual  being, having a human experience.
Gender orientation,only defines what you are, but the things which define who you are, is what really matters!
Who are you? Kind, thoughtful, loving, peaceful, helpful, compassionate...
What are you? Straight, female, tall, underweight, blond...
It's what you have inside that counts, even if society has
often told us a different story.
You must buy certain brands to look like a model, you should eat fast food to be happy, drink alcohol to have fun with friends, own a 5-bedroom 6-bathroom luxury house to be considered successful and on and on!
This is a made-up story which mainly serves businesses increase  profits, but very little to enrich our inner world.
If I told you, your Life is a Miracle and you are a Spirit,
you might wonder if I'm off the wall, lol!
It doesn't matter though if you think that.
Just let yourself open up to the possibility.
Read a couple of my recent posts on this forum
for suggestions on helping reduce anxiety symptoms.
As I'm typing this I'm  listening to HayHouse Radio
(free online inspirational all-talk radio).
Whatever struggles you're facing, whatever questions you're trying to answer, you'll find a family of authors, experts in many fields, teachers, who will listen & share their knowledge/expertise with you.
Well worth a visit!
Best wishes,
Niko