Well, I'm known here for giving the hard things a try, but I'm also known for thinking things through a bit differently, so here goes. Abilify was approved only if all other antidepressants had failed. It's isn't an anti-anxiety med, so I'm guessing wasn't given to you for anxiety. If that was the first med tried with you, that would be very very odd, as it's a last-resort med due to bad clinical trials and lots of unpleasant side effects. Thus, the limited initial FDA approval. Now, the alcoholism. Most experts believe alcoholism is generally driven by depression. I suppose it could also be used for anxiety, but a lot of people actually get worse anxiety when they drink because drinking affects equilibrium and those with bad anxiety often feel disoriented when sober. But some do use it for that. Marijuana also causes anxiety in a lot of people, or at least brings it out, but for others it does the opposite -- at least while you're young. Now they have strains that are supposed to have been bred to be calming. The dangers of pot are a whole lot less than any med for mental illness, and my friend, anxiety is a psychiatric illness. Sorry. It is. But for safety, it's a lot safer than Abilify. When you take any med for mental illness regularly for a long time, it becomes very hard to stop taking and the side effects build up. When you need it, that makes little difference to you, but if you don't, it's a needless risk. What I haven't seen in your post is whether you're in therapy with a psychologist to try to fix all this stuff instead of medicating it. I also hear you blaming all sorts of things on all sorts of other things. At some point, when you get healthy, you'll take responsibility for getting yourself into a lifestyle that is healthier for you. Lots of people have unstructured lifestyles and do not get mental problems from that. Some others do. We have to go by who we are. But you shouldn't really look at life as something where you have to do this, you have to do that, or something terrible happens. That puts a lot of pressure on you and life is hard enough without adding to it. So if I were you I'd get into therapy for the thing that underlies the alcohol abuse, which again is usually depression but maybe it is anxiety. You're right, the alcoholic thing can be very helpful to stay off the stuff but doesn't address the reason one turns to self-medicating in the first place, which is something inside them or about their life they're upset by. That's ultimately the thing to fix when you're able. So in sum, it sounds like you're on an odd med for what you're describing. Pot might help, but it also gets you stoned so you're still in a way hiding. It's okay to use meds when things are way off kilter, but in the end we all want to end the illness and the meds don't do that so whatever you decide to do about medication, and if you really want that, see a psychiatrist and ask, why Abilify? I've suffered with anxiety for a very long time and have been on several meds but Abilify has never ever come up for that. Best of luck figuring this out. Peace.
I have a jarring feeling that nobody will be able to 'answer this' or help me out. This is probably unheard of. Although, I would appreciate that anybody would take time to supply a response.