Are my fears real or a result of anxiety?

[typhooon20]

Anxiety is something I've suffered from before and my biggest problem now is trying to decipher if my fears are real or if they are a result of anxiety. 6 weeks ago I visited an escort and got a handjob where I finished on the woman's chest (sorry for the graphic description). Ever since then, I have this intense fear that somehow I could've gotten her pregnant (my mind is telling me this could happen if she washed herself and wasn't careful) - which would cause chaos in my life - the thought of that sends my anxiety through the roof. I went on lexapro 5 weeks ago and the dosage was increased to 20mg one week ago as 10mg wasn't doing the trick. I think if I knew my fear wasn't realistic, I'd feel a lot better but I can't convince myself of that - thus why I've had to go on Lexapro. So now I'm at a stage where I don't know if the medication is making me anxious or if I truly do have something to fear - my mind won't shut off. Does this sort of thing happen to others? I appreciate all insights, anxiety is such a horrible thing to experience.

[eleanoreloise]

Ok, the person above was super condescending, so I'm going to answer. No, there's a. literally no way she could have become pregnant, and I'm sure you know that too. b. your brain knows that, and it's a struggle to trust the rational parts of your brain, but you have to let it speak louder and louder, you have to trust it more and more, in order to move away from anxiety. Think of the brain like a muscle, rather than an organ, one that has to be trained in a certain way in order to become more rational. Often I have extremely hypochrondriacal fears, which my irrational side tells me are real, and it is incredibly difficult not to trust this frantic, extreme side of my brain, but I know that it's not correct.

On another note, you were likely aiding the sex-sale industry which is troubling! Sex is safer when you do it with someone you trust, who you can ask about their contraception choices. But, sex itself is an anxiety-inducing act for a lot of people for a lot of reasons, which is even more reason to do it with someone you trust.

[Paxiled]

Well, you didn't "have" to go on Lexapro, you chose to.  You could have chosen to see a psychologist who specializes in anxiety treatment or done other things.  So you don't "have" to be on Lexapro.  Now, the difference between anxiety and fear is important -- fear is rational if there's something rational to fear, and obviously, if you know anything about biology, this fear isn't rational.  If you don't know anything about biology you're not ready to be having any kind of sex yet and need to learn how it actually works, but I suspect from your post you do know it's impossible to get someone pregnant this way.  Frankly, it's amazing anyone ever gets pregnant -- it's a pretty difficult process with a lot more failures than successes, but you get lucky -- or unlucky -- sometimes so you have to take precautions.  But you obviously have to get the sperm to the egg and you didn't go there and I think you know that.  Anxiety, as opposed to fear, is irrational and useless -- it's creating discomfort in addition to that which life throws at us anyway.  When you fear something, you either face it or avoid it and the situation ends.  When you're anxious, you create a situation that doesn't end.  Focus on your anxiety problem -- real fear you can deal with.