I am 23 years old and a student. I love school and although sometimes stress and panic over it, I feel confident and can handle it. Home life I can handle too. But when it comes to work, I have only managed to stay in ONE job longer then three months, and I still work there because I am so afraid if I quit I will never be able to work anywhere functionally again.
Every job I have tried I started getting panic attacks and HATED, and would become very depressed and emotional. It consumes all my thoughts and I lose all self confidence.
This has caused me to still live at home, and has stopped me from taking opportunities and doing all these things I want to do. I also worry that once I finally do graduate with a degree, how will I hold a job?
I currently started a job that allows quite a bit of independance (which is really important to me as people being around alot in work makes me panic) with lots of freedom.
But my process is starting again where I obsess over the job, it is ruining my life, and it is now affecting my school and home life. I have missed classes becase I was too exhausted emotionally from work.
I start to dread and obsess over the physical places I have been or have to go to for work. The people, the process, everything.
I thought this would be the start of my new life, but it hasn;t been.
Luckily I refuse to fully let go of my old job, and I am thinking of quitting another job and just staying at the same place I have been.
I am seeing a therapist and am on medications, but I feel like I need to up the dosage.
My therapist thinks I should stick it out, but every aspect of the job (and any job) freaks me out and I become panicked and depressed.
I also have crazy high expectations of myself in the job, and I am extremely emotionally sensitive and once someone is even slightly short with me, I get depressed and emotional and it affects how I view myself.
Sorry so long, but I just want to see if anyone else has ever experienced this, or what people have done to overcome this?
Or even just words of advice, anything.
THank you!