for a while now I've been having extreme mood swings.
Most symptoms are internal and I get really vivid visions of breaking things like smashing up my room or the kitchen. Really bad vivid nightmares and sweat a lot at night.
Then my mind is just super manic, racing thoughts, super high adrenaline to the point of physical shakes. I'm an active person and should work it all out but its just like a wave of adrenaline/mania.
I can't concentrate on anything, find it hard to speak what I'm thinking in coherent sentences.
Generally feel a bit out of control of myself. When It happens, I just want to run away and hide, not see anyone, not exist in the world at all, its scary because I just get tunnel vision to the world, feel like I'm sinking into an abyss.
I'm afraid to enjoy the good moments too much because I know that the crash is so extreme....
I'm not really sure what to do. My doctor sent me to a CBT workshop but that's like common sense to me... and I really don't want to go on meds!