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New Therapist - New Treatment

First off I don’t have panic now but I have anxiety and all the symptoms to the point I am totally disabled and tortured 24/7 and hardly sleep or function.

My new therapist to told me to stop searching for tools to cure my anxiety. Throw away my anxiety books - get off the forums and live like I was normal. This scares the crap out of me - I feel like I have to find an answer and I need support people - she told me to stop NOW!

I am so confused in the past 5 years I have been to so many therapists and read dozens of books and they are all different. I am ready to find a bridge and jump

Please help !!
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Avatar universal
I know exactly what you mean by saying you have to find an answer.  Finding the root cause does seem to be sensible.  I have been anxious as a child and I think my Dad dying has thrown me into something absolutely terrifying.  I had a very difficult relationship with him and had dedicated years of my life to trying to look after him.

Spending too long reading aboout anxiety etc can be counter productive I am sure. It become an obsession but then what else is ther in olur lives.  I feel I am nothing but a collection of awful symptoms. I creep around the house in silence unable to settle to anything in fearful introspection. Dreading what if I get even worse or am really ill etc etc.  I think having some support wold help me and I want to try that first before drugs as am so scared of all the side effects.  Ii am totally alone for hours on end so don't think that is good but I feel too physically ill to go out and do ANYTHING..
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Avatar universal
What I find interesting is this therapist has been treating ONLY anxiety disorders for 31 years and is ranked in the top 10 therapists at the AADA

It took me months to get in to see her - I agree that her technique lacks depth and smacks of Buddhist theory so prevelant in psychology today
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2019697 tn?1334150247
I agree with the both of you. I guess that is why the two of you are community leaders on this forum.

I have learned much over the years concerning anxiety. I have also gained a great deal of knowledge both in therapy and here on this site.

One of my biggest problems now is that I have no "timeouts". I just cant run away to a camp site to escape for a break. I have a family and responsible position in work that I have to dedicate myself to.

I plan to start looking for a therapist because I think it is time to learn or sharpen my coping skills.
Helpful - 0
480448 tn?1426948538
Applause for Lydia!  I second what she said so eloquently.

I think it is important to remember that a healthy balance is important.  If you are reading books about anxiety all days, and spending every waking moment on this site, reading and posting about anxiety, then yes, something like that can be detrimental to any progress.  People can become obsessive.

HOWEVER, education is super important, especially to those that are new to anxiety.  Reading books and participation in a forum like this, IN MODERATION is very helpful.  

It's also important to try to maintain as much normalcy in your life as possible by trying to continue your daily routine.  Keeping busy and keeping the mind and body occupied is also very beneficial, as it takes your mind off the constant cycle of anxious thoughts.  That's totally different than...... "get off the forums and live like I was normal".

Again, everything in moderation.  The idea that we can just somehow "forget" we have anxiety and to try to "trick" our minds normal is absurd.  I would never set foot back in that therapist's office again if it were me.  There are way too many good therapists out there to settle for one that says insane things like that!!!
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370181 tn?1595629445
You two have shared some interesting ideas, some I agree with and some I don't, but I'm not here to debate your ideologies. I'm here to voice my OPINION that both of you have somehow managed to find some of the  worst therapists I've ever heard of!

MysticSoul, here is a direct quote from you about what your current therapists thinks is the best treatment for your anxiety..........

"My new therapist to told me to stop searching for tools to cure my anxiety. Throw away my anxiety books - get off the forums and live like I was normal."

That is such crap advice, I'm stunned. You actually pay her for this?
Would she tell a diabetic or an epileptic or anyone who needs medication to just toss their treatment and live like they were normal? Of course not. Those of us with anxiety/panic/depression/OCD..........we are not "imaginary invalids!" We have real medically based illnesses that destroy our lives. Without medications and/or therapy, we cannot live "normal" lives. There are hundreds of really good therapists out there who understand the kind of illness we have. I would urge you to keep looking for one who is not a moron!

Edgyboy...........while I understand the following words came from a book rahter than a therapist, I can't understand why one of the therapist you've seen did not debunk this thinking................


" I read that acceptance and submission to it is the key. To embrace it, not fear it......."

There IS, without a doubt, some truth in those words. Over time if we can succeed in accepting certain things about anxiety or panic attacks, it can help us to deal a little better when they hit. If we learn what is happening in our bodies, why we feel lightheaded and dizzy or about to faint, why our hearts are going a mile a minute, why we can't seem to breath or that we are strangling, why we are in this terrifying panic mode. Learning that this is a totally normal response of our bodies to a threat, but there IS no threat, then we learn tools and tricks and understanding to bring our bodies back into balance. To rid itself of the overload of adrenalin and to correct the balance of oxygen and carbon dioxide.

Sorry, I've gone on one of my rants. Both of you are suffering quite badly from anxiety and/or panic and you need to find therapists who will work with you to find the root cause of that anxiety/panic and deal with it. That is the ONLY way you will ever be free of this devil. You can mask the symptoms with drugs, but the problem will still be there. You can try running away, but you can't run away from yourself. You can try to pretend it doesn't exist and "just live like your normal." That's really hard to do when you AREN'T normal.

I see you both on here a lot and you seem to be going around and around in circles...........seeking answers and a way out, as are the rest of us. But there is one way out and that is confronting whatever is inside you, that thing you are trying desperately to ignore and deny.
Find THAT+ Face THAT+ Fix THAT= Freedom
Peace
Greenlydia  
Helpful - 0
2019697 tn?1334150247
No problem at all. I am having an anxiety filled day myself. I felt like running out of work a couple of times today. I have xanax I can take but I refuse to take it during the day. I dont want to walk around drugged all day.

I take them when I have to before bed to help me relax. I dont even like taking them at that time either.

Hope and pray you are doing better.
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Avatar universal
Edgy

Thank you for your kind thoughts
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2019697 tn?1334150247
That is a tough one. I know that when my anxiety is in high gear, there isnt much I want to do or much to enjoy. However, I go out and do it anyway. There are times I struggle horribily but what is the alternative?

There are days I dread going into work but what do I do, stay home in fear. at least work is a distraction.

I really feel for you. You sound like a very intelligent person and you have accomplished alot in your life. Build on your accomplishments.
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Avatar universal
Thanks Edgy

My new therpist says to go live life no matter how sick I am - and I am about 100% disabled by this and getting worse
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2019697 tn?1334150247
Finding a bridge is not the answer. I kind of agree with your therapist about the searching. I have searched, read and been to a couple of therapist over the years and I found that it bascially comes down to the individual to do it.

We need to beat this monster inside of us. I read that acceptance and submission to it is the key. To embrace it, not fear it. Well my view on that is it would be like embracing a terrorist wrapped in explosives.

I've considered staying off of this forum a number of times as it just constantly reminds me of anxiety. I also find myself comparing my ills with others to see how bad I am.

Last night while laying in bed I thought I would start off today with a different attitude. I would be more positive and try to be normal. Well the day got off to a slow start in that department. I was very anxious this morning then the thoughts started bothering me and the anxiety was there.

This is difficult but not impossible. You have been there before a few times. You can do this. I read all kinds of posts here of differnent ways anxiety affects people. Sometimes I think I have it worse than anyone else but who knows?

Support groups are good along with this forum but sometimes we need to confront things on our own.
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