Hi......Two of the adverse reactions to smoking marijuana is anxiety and panic, where a person becomes fearful of dying or losing their minds. How things affect us can change with time and you were already vulnerable with how you were feeling and the marijuana caused this adverse reaction. Your heart was in the right place in trying to stick it out with this job, but nobody should have to endure verbal abuse at any time. This took it's toll on you by creating a lot of anxiety, combine this with the adverse reaction from the marijuana and you get what you are enduring now. You really need to address the anxiety, it's making you so fearful which just creates more symptoms. This was an extremely scary event and when we suffer with anxiety and something like this happens, it just ramps up our anxiety making it worse. We can become fixated on the incident making it harder to move on. Whatever was said to you while at that job needs to be tossed out of your mind......it was done by someone who beats down others in order to feel better about themselves....they have big issues. I would see your doctor regarding the anxiety, and be very honest in what happened so he can help you. The marijuana is long gone out of your system and you know to avoid it at all costs now that you know how you'll react to it. You never want to get into self medicating with anything like that, it just leads to worse problems. Exercise is good for burning up the extra adrenaline created by anxiety, try to keep busy so you aren't dwelling on all that's happened. You're fine and will get better but you truly need to seek help with your anxiety. You sound like a very bright and caring young man, don't allow what your boss said to strip you of your confidence, and self respect. You have been through a lot which is making your anxiety worse, so know you're not alone. It's happened to most of us, where something just ramps up our anxiety and it often takes time and help to get us back on track. What happened with the marijuana won't happen again since you have no desire to smoke it again. You're done with that job and the loser of a boss, do your best to put all this behind you to ease your anxiety. I hope this helps and I wish you all the best.
Hi. I want to say thank you for what you wrote. I have tears in my eyes as I read your post because it truly touched my heart. It was my first real job. I guess I just didn't know what to do. I didn't expect that kind of treatment. He also kept throwing it being my first job in my face. Telling me that in this economy, I was lucky to have even been hired. There were times he'd take me in the office and scream at me for an hour. I wanted to leave. But didn't want to quit because of my family having a hard time with finances. I knew my mother was right all those times she told me to quit. She kept telling me we didn't need the extra cash that bad for me to go through that. But I just wanted to try to stick it out, hoping things would get better. But they only got worse. I have been so scared. I just want to feel normal again. I went to my primary physician and told him what happened and he gave me sleeping pills for at night, and some other pill, like something to relax me. But I read that it is extremely addicting. So I haven't taken either of them. He gave me the sleeping pills because I no longer sleep at night. It's the worst for me at night. But I haven't taken them either. I am too afraid to take anything after the feeling I had from smoking the weed. My mother knows about the whole thing. She is easy to talk to and has been there for me through this whole thing. She said the same thing, that the pot I smoked probably heightened the feeling of anxiety I was already having, which probably lead to the panic attack. She used to have panic attacks too and she does have anxiety.She never took anything. She just somehow deals with it herself. I don't know how she does that because I'm trying so hard to stop these feelings and they are still there. I do agree I might have to go back to the doctor. But I don't think my primary Dr. is who I should go to. I think I might need a therapist now. So I will probably look into that next. I just need these feelings to go away. Thanks again for what you wrote and for caring. It means a lot. If anyone else out there is going through this, know that you are not alone. It helps to know that there are people who understand. I'm glad I found this site.
Your boss was a jerk, plain and simple! If you were as bad an he wanted you to believe he would have fired you, but he didn't....which tells me he needed you more than you needed that job! Good for you! You did what any man would do, you did your best to stick it out and I hope you don't feel bad for quitting because no job is worth that!. It's wonderful that you can share these things with your mom, she loves you very much and is there for you no matter what....just awesome! Anxiety is different for each of us and some can get by just fine while others need medication, I think you're being very smart in seeing a therapist first. I hope you start to feel better real soon and we're always here for you!!!
I was up all night. I slept for maybe an hour, but woke up with the worst feeling of fear. And I don't even know what the fear is of. It's like a chill comes over me, and I just feel myself going into a panic. I try to fight it off. But it's just too much. What a I supposed to do? I can't get a job like this. I can't even go to the laundromat or the store. I know I went through a lot at work. But I have gone through so much worse in my lifetime, and this has never happened to me. I know I have my mom and she is great and here for me every step of the way. But I still just feel so alone in this. I don't know what happened to me. Did my mind snap? Please tell me if this something has happened to anyone here. I know I have to go to a therapist, and I'm afraid to get on meds. I didn't want to have to do that. I have read so much about how some people have to try so many different ones to find the right one for them. Or how you can't just stop taking a medication without slowly getting off it. Or how some people get addicted. It's some scary ****, and this whole thing is scary to me. I really need some more advice here. I feel like I'm losing my mind.
you may need to--at this point---seek some professional help. Medication is not the only cute...Behavioural therapy is also an option. But the best person to advise you is a competent professional--preferably a psychiatrist.