Why not stop the drinking? Problem solved!
Yes. i understand over consumption is a no-no. And im sorry to hear about your issues as its out of your control. i figured out on my own that getting wasted to the point of blackout was wrong. that i can fix.
my problem is figuring out if i did anything this time while blackout. future i can control. this issue i have now needs addressing to whether i did something or not.
Since you had a black out, you may never fully know. And ruminating about it won't give you answers. You'll have to move on. Guilt makes people have high levels of anxiety it seems. And I understand that you have levels of guilt because of your girlfriend and the drinking to such excess. Here is what I'd do, go get a full std panel done. HIV, STD's, etc. All adults who are sexually active and may or may not have had an episode (and you found a condom on the ground so that's great and means you probably protected yourself) should do. Once you get all the negatives, just clean up your act and move on. Be a great boyfriend. Cut down or stop drinking. And do some mind switching. When you start spinning with thoughts of this, have a go to thought or scene that you actively make your mind go to. You on a beach.. You playing soccer. You on a date with your girlfriend where you had a really good time. Put those thoughts in your head as soon as you start worrying about this incident. Eventually, your mind will give up. Giving in to worrying about it all the time makes it more real. So, switch your thoughts when you drift to this. good luck
Thank you to all of your answers. Ive already been tested after three months. My girlfriend knows all of this. Ive hid nothing. She still doesnt seemed concerned. My big scare is PRETNANCY. The logical side of me says I wouldnt be able to get an erection to perform. I realize that could just be the paranoid mind. Remember. Im still not 100% i actually found a condom or imagination. Anywho though. thank you again. This is more of something to practice not thinking about.
Does anyone think I should be too concerned about pregnancy. Considering the alcohol content in my system? Ive suffered the same “whiskey d**k” before. Considering the unlikelyhood someone would go home with me in that state. Then the diffuculty to perform. My chances of pregnancy happening are next to nil, right?
And how would she find me if something did happen? if we dont know one another. rather find out now then 5 yesrs down the road.