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229760 tn?1291467870

Tell us about your Angel!

My little Angels name is Cooper. He was born on June 6th, 2008. He was born with a heart condition called HLHS. We found out about his condition at his 18 wk ultrasound. Of course our world was shattered but we were prepared to fight!

The day after Cooper was born he was taken to Children's Hospital. It was there that we met the most amazing nurses and doctors. We could not have asked for more loving people. After two weeks in the NICU, Cooper underwent his first open-heart surgery. Sadly things did not go so well so they had to operate a total of three more times. On July 23rd his doctors told us that he was not going to make it and we had to make a decision. I was not prepared for this at all.  Thankfully my brave little Angel made this decision for us.  He was in my arms the last time he took his last breath.  His chest was still open from his surgery and I could see his little heart stop beating.  At that point my world had ended. I was ready to leave this world and be with him again.

It has been a little over a year since my little man became an Angel and I know he has never left my side.  Through the help of my husband, my family, my counselor and my support group, I can now smile again!  Cooper  blessed us with so much! He even gave us his little brother! Cruz Cooper was born on August 11th, 2009! This little guy will grow up to know all about the love and hope his brother brought into this world!!!

I have plenty of pictures of Cooper on my profile page, so feel free to look at my beautiful little angel!

Thank you for reading my story and thank you for sharing yours with me!
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Avatar universal
My little angels name is Isabella she was born on Feb. 14,2011 and she died shortly after birth. I was 38 weeks pregnant and had no complications. I really wish i knew why she didnt make it so i could have a peace of mind I have plenty of pictures of her and now i just found out i am 5 weeks pregnant i am really scared and worried because i dont want to loose this baby too.
Helpful - 0
1521759 tn?1298337665
My Angel story happend on October 10/2010 this will always be the worst day of my life.
When my water broke @ 12:03am that Sunday morning I was only 20weeks I knew what was happening but did not want to accept it. We drove to the Hospital my Dr. The Speciallist and the Pediatricion told us our baby boy Sebastian had no chance it broke my heart I could not belive this was happening to us. When he was born he had already passed I remember the last kick I felt like if it was yesturday it has been the hardest thing we have ever had to go throw my two kids were so sad and my husband was in shock but very suported I dirent want to see anyone or talk to anyone for weeks. I'am pregnant now 19 weeks and very scared as the weeks go by and hits to 20weeks I had a Cerclage done at 14weeks but the fear will always be there. God wanted our Angel with him but now he is sending us another baby Boy we will never forget our Sebastian when they ask me how many kids I have I include him. This is my Angels story I cant Stop crying as I type and read all the sad stories of our Angel babies.
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1439825 tn?1296492285
Hello I just ran into this site today I think its a good one.

I also have a baby girl angel in heaven. I had waited so long to have her I had been TTC for about 3years. Well one day I was having UTI sx and went to the Dr and asked if they could do a HPT and they said yes well they told me that I was pregant and I was in shock because I didnt believe it. I told my husband and he was so happy it was his 1st baby. The Pregnancy went smooth I was High risk because I had Diabetes.

I told my OB that I was very worried and asked he was going to send me to High Risk OB and he said that there was no need for it that everything was good the sono's are ok etc. I had sono alot to make sure the things were ok. I was to go to the Hospital at 35weeks for my C section on June 10, 2008 and had my beautiful baby Girl at 10:30am her name is Ximena Hernandez.

Everything was well they took us back to our room to show everyone our new baby to our small happy family. on June 12, 2010 in the evening the nurse took the baby give her a bath and check out everything so we could go home in the morning, Well I started to get nervoues because it took them go time to return then the RN came to my room to tell that our baby was no ok she was breathing to face and they thing she might have a URI so they were going to check things out run some test and do an Chest XRay. Well then they came back and told me they were going to send upstairs to ICU.

Then I became realy scared because I didnt know what to expect to hear from the Dr I finally asked them to tell what is going on and they said that the Xray showed that her Heart was on the Right side and they would do an echo the echo showed many other Heart defects. So she was flown to KC Childrens Mercy Hosp. There that the Hospital they discovered that she only had one Kidney. I asked why couldnt they tell me this before from all the US I had done no could answer me.

She was waiting on a surgery date while the wait she developed Tacycarida and other problems. 3weeks and she had open heart surgery to repair her little broken heart she made out ok.After a couple of days she was good so they tried to take her off her breathing machine but couldnt handle it. Never did she gave us a scare and her heart stopped and she coded it was the worst time of my life to know that my lil princeness was going to leave this earth without even seeing the sun or fell the wind on her skin or that I was not going to get to see her grow up. Well she made to though the CPR God gave me a few more days until July 24, 2010 she passed away in my arms.
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1310570 tn?1404719992
Hey hun

That an unbelivable story... cant believe what you have went thru.. xx
I am truely sorry for your loss I dont have the slighest idea how you felt.. we have never even had a BFP in the whole 12 months we have been trying!

Soo glad I could find you on medhelp... really happy to get to know you and travel our TTC and pregnancy journeys together!

I feel emotionally for you and I want a healthy happy pregnancy for you as much as I do myself!
xxx
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1382355 tn?1372530675
Me and my fiance have been trying to conceive since Dec 09', after making the decision were ready to start our own little family on Christmas Day.
We got pregnant 18th May 10', and got engaged on our 2 year anniversary 20th May 10'.

I found out I was pregnant 10th June, the most happiest day of my life!! I couldn't believe it..
I was engaged to the love of my life and going to have his baby. My world was complete!
However, my pregnancy was short lived. I miscarried on 16th June at 4 weeks 1 day.
Although I was really early, my world was torn apart and my heart was shattered.
Throughout those 6 days of pregnancy I was very nevous, and scared that something was going to go wrong.
My younger sister give birth to her 29 week old baby on the landing of my mum's house at 4am in front of me 3 years early. Although he is a smashing, healthy 3 year old boy who I cherish with my all heart, both him and my sister was very ill. My nephew spent the 1st year of his life, having several serious operations.
The 14th June my pregnancy was confirmed by my GP and I was looking forward to growing a huge belly. This day I began spotting pink. I immedialtely began worrying like mad. Everybody told me not to worry its normal but I couldn't help it. The spotting didn't last long but I was still paranoid.
The next day around lunch I began to feel pains, I knew something was wrong now. I rang the NHS helpline, by now I as spotting frequently, who told me to go see my GP.
My fiance took the evening off work and we went straight to the ER. I was still bleeding and the pains were on an off, I was still spotting.
I spent the rest of the day at the ER doing urine, blood tests and scans.
They sent me home around 5pm that evening saying everything was fine. I went home shattered but happy and fell asleep til the next morning. When I did wake up I felt strange, really strange. My pregnancy symptoms had disappeard and I was very emotional, I burst into tears for no reason and cried for hours.
When my fiance returned home at 3pm that day I had bad pains like period pains, I was passing rather large clots.
We rushed back to ER where I passed my 4 week 1 day old fetus.

5 months on... I have been diagonsied with PPD (Post Partum Depression, a depression that women get after giving birth), and I have spent months off work BUT am feeling positive and my wonderful fiance and I are TTC again hoping this month is our month!!

I think this post is a great idea and I have found alot of comfort and advice here on MEDHELP, I have even made a great friend..

Want to say am sorry to all the ladies who are going through the traumatic time our losing a little angel, and I wish you the luck in the future..
Wishing everybody who's TTC a BFP soon!!

   xx
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715068 tn?1392933532
I just recently lost our second angel.  In Dec. of 2008 I went in for a regular u/s, the tech told us that our baby boy had passed away.  I was 18 weeks & 4 days.  The next morning I went in for a D&C.  We found out we were expecting again in Dec. 2009.  After our 1st u/s & AFP screening we were told that our baby had a 1 in 3 chance of being born with Down Syndrome.  We were scheduled for an amnio to be done on 03/22/10.  Thursday morning, 03/11/10 I woke up & knew something wasn't right.  I went to the E.R. & was told that my baby had passed.  I was 17 weeks & 4days.  We were admitted into the hospital Friday afternoon & they started induction at 2 p.m.  Our baby boy was born at 2:52 am Saturday March 13, 2010.  It was my brothers birthday & the day before our 1 yr. wedding anniversary.  He was absolutely perfect, 7.08 inches & 5 oz.  We gave him my husbands middle name, Alvin.  They asked if I wanted to hold him & I knew that I needed to.  DH could not handle it & he left the room.  It broke my heart that he did not see our beautiful baby boy but I understand that he couldn't do it.  Unfortunately I only got to spend about 45 minutes with him.  I called the nurse into the room because I was not feeling well, she checked me & I was bleeding very badly.  I ended up needing a D&C because the placenta did not detach.  I lost 25% of my blood & needed a transfusion.  We had a small tissue sample sent to the lab & hopefully this week we will know what (if anything) was 'wrong' with our baby.  We are also meeting with a specialist on April 12 to have both of our blood tested to see why we lost 2 babies at almost the exact same gestation. I am not sure if we will try again.  DH seems ready for me to be preg again....I am not quite so sure.
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1240295 tn?1268201854
At 20 weeks of gestation we got recaled for our ultrasound because they had seen problems with our child. When we got there they discovered that he had possibly Meckel-Gruber syndrome. We were devastated as they said he would probably die in utero and if he did get to t erm he would die shortly after. They suggested abortion. We decided to keep our child and give him the chance to die on his own. They did all kind of genetic research and it all lead to the same conclusion that he would die soon. The pregnancy went well despite all that and at 37 weeks I gave birth to a breached child that we named Jacob. He lived for 16 minutes, the best minutes of our lives. He had all the symptoms of a Meckel-Gruber child but in our eyes he was the most beautiful baby ever. We do not regret our decision to let him live
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554628 tn?1362777919
first off i just want to say i'm sorry to every single one of you ladies who have lost their little one, my hearts go out to you and hope you find peace. before i begin i lost a baby at 8 wks as a miscarriage in aug 07, 3 months later i got pregnant again and on valentines day of 08 we found out we were having identical twins, at that point i was 14 wks. we went to our 20 wk scan and found out we were having identical twin boys.... we were so excited things were going good then it got quiet. we found out our little anges had twin to twin transfusion syndrome known as ttts, and i had an incompetent cervix. well there were only 3 places in the united states at that time who could do the precedure to try to help with this and take care of it, california, florida, and ohio. well 3 days had passed and we got my insurance to cover all costs and drove to cinncinatti ohio where we went through many tests and etc. during that time they checked my cervix on day 2 it was so short i wasn't able to walk at all bed rest for rest of time and wheel chair while at the hospital. we had echo's done on twins as well as other tests and was told it had progressed to a 3 out of 5 and 5 is death of one or more twin. i was immedietly released from fetal care center and sent to l&d at university hospital. there i met with a few doctors who told me the precedure that i would  have a cerclage then amnio to reduce fluids and had to weight for my cervix to be so long b4 we could have the operation we went up there for. well next morning my doctor wasn't there so an hour late another doctor shows up and wheels me to the Operating Room, gave me my spinal/epideral and etc, put the curtain up so i couldn't see ne thing. well i was told to lift my legs and i didn't know what whas going on bc couldn't see and sick ... well the amnio was done first which then started contractions and labor, when they went to put the cerclage in i was told it was too late, i had bulging membranes.  they sent me to recovery for an hour or so, and during that time, my water broke. i was rushed to labor and delivery and within an hour i had my lil angel preston. he was only 8 oz at 21 wks. and i held for a few moments and then pain started bc of going into labor for the other twin. they took preston bc he was still born. a lil while had passed and i had aiden he was right at a 1lb. he was still breathing and you could see his little heart beating, i was devistated and so upset , my bf held him but i couldn't image knowing my baby was going to die. they told me there was nothing they could do, i never got to hold him and regret this to this day. there isn't a minute that passes that i don't think of him and wish i could tell him how much i loved him but i it all happened so fast i was distraught and it was terrible. i cried for days, weeks and even now here and there when looking at pics. the nurses made a scrap book and took some pics for me. i never got a death certificate bc they were a few days shy of 21 wks i was told.  i was released at 7pm and the following morning we drove back home to tn empty handed. i didn't have a funeral for them. i miss then more and more everyday. so i lost my two angels on march 20, 2008; my cousins birthday; my family was in florida with my grandfather bc of his cancer. it was a terrible day. it was 3 days b4 my 21st birthday i got home the day b4 my birthday. aiden lived for a lil over an hr b4 passing away. but in the end i know i wouldn't have my beautiful lil girl madison if that didn't happen. and i can't see my life w/o her.
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229760 tn?1291467870
wishing- I am so sorry. Your story is heartbreaking. I am so glad you found us and I hope we can bring you some support.  

ready4baby- thank you for sharing your story with us. I am so sorry you had to find this site. I wish you still had that little one in your arms.  

Just know that your baby is always watching over you! Please feel free to message me when you need to talk!
Helpful - 0
933846 tn?1353452448
This is probably the hardest forum post I have had to read since i joined Medhelp over the summer. I joined after I had my IUD out back in June...we concieved right away. We both wanted a little boy but it didnt matter either way. My pregnancy was going well and I was so excited to go to our anatomy scan to see the sex. My husband and I both guessed it was a boy but my daughter said girl, however when the U/S tech started the US she was very quiet. She wouldnt turn the screen around and I knew something was wrong. There was no fluid around the baby and there were multiple cyst on both of the kidneys. I just knew there was nothing to be done but we had to wait another day to see my OB doctor. She told us it didnt look good but we needed to see a high risk doctor. Our baby had a strong heartbeat and was still moving. When we went to see the High Risk doctor she confirmed the worst...the cyst werent compatible with life. So I had to deliever the baby and my labor wasnt bad at all. Our little Matthew was perfect to us. He has very broad shoulders and looked just like my husband with my lips. The next day we had prayer service at the hospital with our family.

I'm trying to get things back to normal at my house but its so hard. I'll be attending a support group in the next couple of week and I'm hoping it will help.
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1097936 tn?1290223186
I first of all want to express my heartfelt empathy for you.  My little Angel was born on October 10th 2009.  The finding out process was almost entirely the same, this is our first baby and was to be the first grandbaby on my side of the family as well as the first boy.  I was 23 weeks and hadn't felt him move for almost 2 days...this was my first pregnancy and therefore just didn't realize the need to call the doctor.  They sent me up to L/D and tried to find the heartbeat with the doppler....then wheeled in the ultrasound machine...then brought in the doctor on call who still couldn't find the heartbeat...there was no mistaking-there wasn't one to be found. It was more than heartbreaking.  It was easily the most heart wrenching pain I've ever experienced and hope to ever experience-my heart goes out to women who have to go through this experience.  I was induced that day and delivered our sweet little Bridger on the following day at 4:20pm.  He as 1.6pounds and 12.5 inches long.  He was beautiful, the most amazing miracle I've ever seen.  We got to hold him for hours at the hospital, wishing he was able to hear us say how much we love him. My arms still ache for our precious little baby. I am once again, so sorry that you and any woman has to go through this.  It will be 4 weeks tomorrow for us and our little one and what I woudn't give to hold him again!  
Our little babies are watching over us and I know that they know how much we love them!
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Avatar universal
Thank you for your kind words!  It is a wonderful feeling to know that I am not alone and that people are thinking about my baby.

I never thought I would loose my son - I was 35 weeks pregnant so I thought I was in the clear by that point.

Thank you!!!!
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229760 tn?1291467870
I am truly hurting for you..........this is such an intense pain you are going through, but just know that it WILL get better!!!!

I am sure Jonathan is looking after you everyday. I bet you feel that love in every tear you cry!

Stay strong my friend and thank you for sharing your Angel!!!!!!!!!
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525485 tn?1314361301
I am so sorry for your recent loss. Please know that we are all here if you need to talk. Just know that your little angel Jonathan is watching over you and your husband.

God Bless.
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Avatar universal
On August 16 2009 - mine and my husbands 1 yr wedding anniversary, our hearts were shattered.  I did not feel my baby move for the whole day so went into emerg.  They sent me straight up to L&D where they hooked me up to the strap fetal monitor.  They could not find a heart beat.  They wheeled in an ultrasound machine and performed an ultrasound.  I could see my baby on the screen looking so lifeless, they found his heart and it wasn't beating.  I looked at the Dr and said "thats my baby, its gone?" and as her eyes filled with tears she simply nodded.  My whole world fell apart in that instant.
The next morning I was induced and on August 18th at 2:44 am my son Jonathan was born.  We did not know the sex of our baby and we were so delighted and proud we had the first grandson on both sides of our family.  
He was perfect in everyway! We had an autopsy performed and several tests that all came back clear.  It has been nearly 10 weeks and we are desperately longing to have a baby in our arms. I hope that I will be able to bring a baby home one day to pour all my love into. I miss my baby more than I can bear.  
I will pray for all of you angel mommies to have strength to carry on!
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145992 tn?1341345074
I have never experienced a loss of a child and therefore don't know how difficult of a time you ladies have, but I joined this group because I want to send you all my thoughts and prayers and want to tell you that I believe you are the strongest women I have ever had a chance of getting to know.  Sending big hugs to all of you and to all of your angels.
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229760 tn?1291467870
Hi Lori! Thank you for sharing the story of your sweet little Salvatore.  I know as his Angel Day draws closer it becomes very difficult all over again. Believe me I had my first with Cooper this summer. Surprisingly, it actually brought some comfort and closer. The first everything is so hard and this was the hardest.  I pray that you find some strength on this day. Go and celebrate your little man, because he is in the best place ever. I celebrated this day with my family by getting a pedi!!!! My motto is "live to make your little angel proud"!!!!

I really appreciate you letting Salvatore into our lives!!!!!
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693804 tn?1304720474
Hi Everyone! I'd like to start off by saying that my heart goes out to each and everyone of you. My name is Lori and my Angels name is Salvatore Mark. I found out at my routine check up on 10/15/08(Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness) at almost 5 months that his tiny heart stopped beating for reasons we'll never know. I was induced the following day and delivered early the next morning. My world was shattered. I got to hold him and love him for a few hours, but it wasn't nearly long enough. The anniversary of his "angel" birth is on Oct. 17 and i'm finding this to be a difficult time. I'm glad I stumbled upon this group and was able to share my story.

                             Thanks Rachel
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229760 tn?1291467870
Oh Marina, this sorry to heart wrenching. This is just so unfair and so unjust. I am so  very sorry. My heart is just breaking for you.

I have looked at Miley's pictures several times and she is such a beautiful little girl! She looks just like you!!!

I know what you mean about wondering what they would have looked like as they grow. Wondering what they would sound like and how they would grow up knowing they were so very loved.  

I pray that Miley sends you a little brother or sister real soon. Not to replace her but to help you love with that part of your heart all over again. Baby Angels are very special and I know that she is taking very good care of Mommy and Daddy!!!

Thank you for joining this community!

Rachel
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1024289 tn?1283296969
My little angels name is Miley.  She was born on the 25th January 2009.  It was a very long and painful induced labour but I was told over and over that all was fine, and it was until her little head was born.  Once her head had come out the midwife reached down to unloop the cord wrapped around her tiny little neck, she found it was "too tight" and told the doctor so.  He stood there with his arms folded and did and said nothing.  I felt two bit jolts and my partner who was watching her later told me it was her gasping for air.  For some reason the midwife and doctor waited 6 minutes before they decided to pull her out.  By this time she was gone.  I watched them pump on her tiny little chest and stick her with an adrenalin needle in her still heart.  They did this for about 20 minutes but it was too late.  He then put our little girl on my chest and said "this baby is dead, sorry" and pretended to wipe his eyes.  We got to spend a few hours with our baby but it should have been alot longer.  To this day I struggle to look at other mothers with their precious little bundles of joy without thinking, gee i wonder if Miley would look like that or simply crying!!  We are trying for another little one but its not so easy.  I will love our little girl forever and will never ever stop thinking of her!!!  My heart goes out to all you other ladies who feel the same way as me.  Take care.  Marina.
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525485 tn?1314361301
I am so sorry for your loss.......

Just know he is an angel watching over you and your family!
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182926 tn?1273012392
I am so sorry for all of you.  I will Pray for you Tricia.  There are no words that can make it go away.  My story:  I am a mother of 5.  I had had my 4th child and unexpectedly found ourselves pregnant again.  I was so hesitant and don;t really think I fully accepted him until October 1st of last year I found out he was a boy..(not that I cared, I would of been happy either way).  I went shopping.  Everything I thought looked great.  I had a little spotting but nothing big..  They suddenly the morning of 10/7/08 changed everything.  my water broke..  I knew being an RN that he would not make it..  My heart broke too..  The ambulance came and took me to the hospital where I saw it in their eyes. I was told I would have to deliver..I was 18 weeks.  I prayed he would go to heaven so he would not have any pain..  I labored painlessly for hours..  (they gave me an epidural, that actually worked).  I delivered my perfect son at 10:22 pm he weighed 6.5 ounces and was 8.5 inches long..  I held him for hours..  It will be 1 year on Wednesday and we will be in Disney World.  I am now pregnant with number 6 and cherishing every minute of it.. MY son's name was Cooper Earl, after my grandfathers.  I won't celebrat this baby until 28 weeks.  Feb 12,2010.  I will celebrate my family all of it..  God Bless..    
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896815 tn?1279805115
tricia i had the same experience. I had my angel in the almost in the same way.my angel was born as if theres nothing wrong. just pray it really helps a lot. what happened to us is a very painful but god has better plans maybe soon he'll give us a stronger baby.. which we cant take care until our hair turs to gray just pray tricia.your angel willl not like it if she sees you crying. They know how much we love them though were not able to hug them that long.
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229760 tn?1291467870
Tricia, share when you are ready. Just remember we are all here for you and you will never have to face this alone. Let the tears flow, cry as often as you need. Believe me I did not know it was humanly possible to cry so much.

You are such a strong and brave woman. You will forever be in my prayers!
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