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Avatar universal

Friends say this counts as abuse?

Okay, so as you all know, I have been learning to drive with people who raised me my whole life but are not my real parents.

I have just found out what may be causing me to have breakdowns whenever they take me out driving. When I was in fifth grade, their son and I were running late to my graduation thing. She was screaming at us the whole time she was driving. The daughter, the son, and I were all scared. I don't know why they didn't breakdown crying like I did, but they might be tougher people than me. As I was crying, she began screaming at me. She was shrieking at the top of her lungs, 'Why are you crying?! If you don't stop crying, I'll give you a reason to cry and hit you!' This just obviously made things worse. She was extremely mad the whole time; she kept threatening to hit me if I didn't stop. What I thought was strange was that she actually managed to pretend to be happy when we entered the school. I was too much of a wreck though. I couldn't stop crying.

So, she pulled me aside and told me in the fakest tone ever, 'I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that.' I never stopped crying. Its too bad that nobody noticed.

I am thinking this maybe conrtributing to the whole 'why-I-can't-drive-with-them' thing. But, knowing them, they'll just say 'Get over it.' My best friend told me this counts as physical abuse. I'm not sure if it does or not, but I'm just wondering if it is.
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915369 tn?1355314810
It's not physical abuse, but it's still abuse and is just as serious.
Is there a way you can talk to a teacher, counselor, doctor, or a friends parents about this? They'd be able to help you in this sort of situation.
Helpful - 0
585414 tn?1288941302
You have to think about what is best for you. If you have another place you could live that's fine. But if not and even regardless you might want to speak to the appropriate agency such as C.P.S. You cannot face trouble for filing a report. Its your decision but it would be best to put a stop to any form of abuse for your own emotional welfare. As stated by the other poster emotional abuse is still abuse. I experienced it as well as a young person and it has traumatized me for life and I wish I had done something about it at the time. Now there are more safeguards to stop it and people can use them to protect their rights.
Helpful - 0
505907 tn?1258369340
That whole situation sounds so VERY familiar. I was just like you but now I can empathize with my mother (who is more severely BP but undiagnosed) now that I'm a mother too. Her condition leads her to care very much what everyone is thinking (she assumes) because of her paranoia. I had a birthday once where she took the side of the little girls who were making me unhappy - she was embarrassed. Well, know what? I WAS being hysterical and not trying to get a grip on myself. Of course that isn't PHYSICAL abuse - it's verbal. I agree you need counseling but then it is going to be up to you whether you continue to let this haunt you. Best of luck.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Sounds like emotional and psychological abuse to me.  I know more than my fair share about abuse.
Helpful - 0
944643 tn?1418214422
its definitely a form of abuse. My dad emotionally abused me...my ex husband did too.
Helpful - 0
952564 tn?1268368647
I did tell you before that it is abuse. I'm serious about emotional abuse being just as bad and even worse than physical abuse, since no one can see the scars and they are harder to heal. It sounds like you are a teen in your posts. You need to talk to someone in authority you can trust. I'm not kidding. These people are doing serious harm to you and you do not deserve it. It may be easy to tell us here on a forum because we're faceless people. But you need to tell someone in your real life world. Trust me, it is scary but you deserve better.

It sounds like they've been emotionally abusing you for a long time, so I know this will be hard. Please be brave. There are people out there who can help you and get you out of there.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Um, the woman has no mental disorders, she's just angry and controlling. That's why her favorite child never talks to her.
Helpful - 0
952564 tn?1268368647
It doesn't matter if she has a disorder or not. Abuse is abuse is abuse. If she did have a disorder I would say she needs treatment and you all need family therapy, but since she doesn't then she is doing it of her own free will and that is horrible! If there is any such thing as evil in this world, it is purposeful abuse.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Yeah that's true it doesn't matter if she has a mental disorder or not, abuse is abuse.  All forms of abuse are equally serious.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I regret not doing anything about anything during all the years I was abused and am probably traumatized for life by it.
Helpful - 0
505907 tn?1258369340
I never implied that YOUR hysterical person HAS a mental disability, on the other hand, many "angry and controlling" people, though undiagnosed, do, Once you can track what is triggering your unhappiness you have to try and understand it and then let it go. Isn't there ANYONE else who can teach you to drive? BP people often deal poorly with pressure and if you are reminded every time of this incident from your past then it will make you a nervous driver - which is dangerous.
Helpful - 0
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