1325193 tn?1450127436

I hope someone reads this.

Hi all. I have posted to other forums, but never this one. I hate to ask this, because it is asked a lot. How did you know you were bipolar?? I have had horrible physical anxiety ever day for the last 6 months. Headaches everday, and I mean every day. Non stop,crying. Sometimes I don't feel,as bad and sometimes I do. I,have never had what you would call mania. I have been on 10mg of lexapro for the last 10 years, with no,problems, and then boom,one day, it came on. I am so scared. My pdoc tried to switch me to another anti,depressant and when I started to taper my anxiety made me shake. If I try to increase it same thing. Its like I am stuck on 10 and can't go,either way. I am also now,taking 600 mg of triliptal, and it helped a little,but not now. My doc thinks it's anxiety and no,sign of,bipolar. I simply don't know. I,have never had depression like this and it scares me. I,have had mri and it was clean. I,am 41 and this just started. Sucicide is in my brain everyday, but I can't do,that to, my family. Plus I am a Christian, so my faith won't let me. I want to please the Lord. It seems like I will be stuck forever like this....please some one help and give me hope!!!
9 Responses
1325193 tn?1450127436
So,people don't answer questions on this forum?
6726276 tn?1421126668
Hi. This forum just went through a major overhaul. Sorry.
  If you're sucicidal that's no good. That may mean you have to go in patient. But once in hospital a pdoc can give you some tests and see if you're bipolar.
1325193 tn?1450127436
Please don't apologize. I am,just so,scared and frustrated. I just want to be well,again.
17233597 tn?1454817976
I am sorry you did not get an immediate reply.  I am here I will listen.  I have experience with both anxiety and bipolar. Do you experienced where you do  things like buy in excess or anything in excess, fast rapid thoughts jumping around thoughts?

I have had thoughts of self harm and suicide I would never do it for similar reasons my relationship with God and my parents have passed I want to see them again.

Please do not feel alone many people have these type of difficulties.  Each person experiences this different. Tell me your story.
Avatar universal
Hi, Chad. I wanted to login and write you after keeping up with your post since November. I apologize for not getting with you sooner, but my own anxiety and depression was too much for me to reach out. On July 30th, I took my last dose of loperamide. After six months of tapering from a mega dose, I was so relieved to be done. During the whole taper and these past 6+ months, I've had daily headaches, mind numbing brain fog, anxiety and panic attacks, severe depression and worst of all no motivation or joy. It's been rough. I've been hopeless before. Maybe a day or so, but day after day for months is soul crushing and unfamiliar. I understand your anger and sadness. I relate to your despair and frustration. I'm also a devoted Christian and this experience has broken my spirit. But.....I am feeling better. The daily anxiety attacks have gone away. My accelerated heart beat had slowed down. The head pain and headaches have decreased in severity from a 9 to a 4. I've got so much to say, but the most important is that it does get better. I had to finally let all the doctor's appt.'s and the endless internet searches go. I don't have to know what's going on % 100. I told God I will not give into this and die.Just please let me know you're going to heal me of this or at the very least be with me every day, and He has. I'm not cured physically, but my mind and soul have been pulled out of the pit of Hell, before it was too late. Your experience with withdrawal has probably been the closest to my own and that's a good thing. Let's me know I'm not the odd person out. Please take comfort from this comment- champagne supernova-
17323653 tn?1455650594
I was in a relationship with a horrible person and we were going to get married but he was a "manipulateur"
If you want to know more about it read : the 30 characteristics of a manipulator by Isabelle Nazare-Aga
So I broke up 2 months before the ceremony and I was already depressed
Right after that, my father has gone gotten sick and I took care of him for 2 years then he passed away, that was 3 years ago
Here is where I stopped talking to people and went into deep depression staying in the dark room
I could accept that I was depressed but I couldn't accept the mood swings, one day I'm depressed and the other day I invite my mom's friends over and make a nice dinner, of course I help and assist very well but I never take the whole responsibility
So I searched for mood swings and I found the symptoms and here we are :)
17323653 tn?1455650594
I forgot to tell you that I feel angry most of the time
1325193 tn?1450127436
I am sorry I have not responded to,end of you... I just got back on the website after some,time. Thank you to all who responded it meant the world to me I too AM angry a lot and the doctors of got me on all kinds of medicine to try to call me down nothing like xanax though just please keep me in your prayers as I go through this misery it's been almost 7 months now
17323653 tn?1455650594
I feel better and I wanted to share this with you, I take Osteocare and I feel way better and will soon prepare the magnesium chloride (magnesium oil)
I dont know if websites appear on the thread or will be deleted but search for "magnesium benefits" - "magnesium in neurological diseases and emotions" - "how to prepare magnesium chloride"

Please try and tell how you feel, but give it some time it's not a medicine

P.S.: If you are gonna take Osteocare drink a lot of water to protect the kidneys
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