I am here for you.Don't cut.Don't cut. You know in your heart you don't deserve to cause pain to yourself.Put it back to the people that have done all those things to you. let them wallow in their mud, don't allow them to put their mud on you. Open your eyes to what you were viewing when you were on that road of progress.I am here message me if you need.RJ
Look you ar accepted here, dont worry, you are very honest.
Is there a connection between not getting out of the house. It is just a hunch. Being stuck in are you not full of pent up energy? Could you try fast walking? or some way to burn the energy. even jumping around or beating a pillow.
Do you have pent up energy. but i get the feeling you are on the road to cracking this.
Is there any psychological support for you there where you are living? Or someone who can give you advice in this area?
Hi, You haven't let anyone down, you've done so well going the 6 days and that is what you need to focus on - the positive side! It does sound as if you are under more stress at the moment with the family stuff that is going on and this is obviously going to be a factor in how you are dealing with things.
I know that ADs make me very agitated and I refuse point blank to take them now, it sounds like another chat with your Doc. Is it your reg doc who prescribes them or your pdoc?
Take each day at a time, don't think of it as having failed, today is a new day :-)
had a really bad night last night. locked myself into my room, took my klonopin and xanax and tried to relax, no joy. two hours later took an ambien. still no joy. tried to get hold of pdoc but couldnt. we had reduced lexapro and it had stopped the rapid cylcing but he got me to up it again yesterday, bad idea! the meds seem to work for six or seven hours during the day and i had actually left the house for the first time in months because i wanted to not because i had to and went and got my hair done, spent some time in friends house (lasted nearly two hours, usually only can manage a half an hour!) got some good news from shane (my son) his back money came through finally so i should have some money coming my way. then down, down again at about eight o'clock. eventually at about midnight i gave in and cut. 20. still find it weird tht they have to be even numbers and evenly spaced! i feel so bad about it today but still want to do it again! it really is worse than any drug addiction. never experienced anything like it. my left leg is destroyed and my right is on its way. increased lamictal today so hopefully that will help. it just seems to me that any antidepressant just makes me agitated and i wish i could get that into pdoc's head! although 10mgs of lexapro at least doesnt have the bad effect of 20 or 15. in some ways i feel to that i let you guys down too. still nearly six days is better than the four of the last time so maybe next time... my sister is coming today, haven't seen her in nearly two years, she lives in usa. my other sister has asked me to broach the fact with her that my parents want her to leave even though she's booked til end of march and came home to help them as my mother isnot fit any more to do stuff. what kind of parents are they? couldn't imagine even thinking that about my kids never mind voicing the fact that they don't want her staying with them! she's dealing with major depression herself so she's going to be really hurt by all of this.
You are doing great!!
Find a new habit to replace the old, like doing something nice for yourself, and be kind to yourself and look after yourself.
You really are doing very well. Is there anything you can have to help get through the evenings?
Keep it up. Its a hard addiction to kick. But you've done it. I'm here if you need ot talk. Take care
thanks again. am into day five. urges are stronger because cuts are healing. stange thing! meds kick in for some of the day but by evening am down low again and go to sleep hoping fervently that i wont wake up and wake up thinking f**k i woke up!
only an hour now!!! you're doing really well, keep it up :-)
thanks. almost at end of day four two more hours! maybe meds are kicking in as i do feel less low. a bit of rapid cycling but think lowering lexapro might help with that. talked to pdoc this morning.
Be encouraged, please and just take the last few days as a relapse on the road to giving up - completely. sometimes we have to try and try with things and then we get it.
Good luck and stay strong
WELL DONE! AND STAY STRONG! Whenever you feel that urge then come on here or find some mind numbing card game like solitaire to play. You can do it, we're all behind you.