Thanks so much for all the support!! Fianances are tight with both us working and I don't want to let my husband down financially...at the same time I suffer at work. I try to maintain everything is fine and inside I feel like I'm being torn up emotionally. I can't handle all the stimulation that happens in an office setting. Even today, I went to a book store, and this woman came right up behind me snapping her gum over and over. The shock of the noise hit my sciatic nerve and my back jolted. This noise problem not only effects my nerves but effects my emotions. I went from being calm, reading a book, to extremly irritable, hurt feeling, and angry. This person hung around for quite awhile and I felt like dashing away, but I made myself stay, because I didn't want to be controlled by the noise. I can tell you my heartbeat went up, and by the time she left, I was pissed. I want to go on disability thru my employer which would cover 60% of what I make...
I am on disability but I live in the uk so its a bit different, it was my 4th attempt in 12 years, but we have a disability service here that helped me fill the forms in, I had a medical which was stressful but worth it, it took 3 months ish but worth it now!
I was having a terrible struggle working and ended up getting fired but I ended up on disability the very first application, which is rare to happen. Although I have been diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder but if you have too much trouble working and have been diagnosed with bipolar disorder you can get on disability too, if need be, but be prepared for it to take a long long time. It took me roughly six or seven months which is considered a really short time frame in the process.
Work is a terrible struggle, I do agree. But it all depends on us. If you see it like it`s your opportunitty to have enough money to enyoj life, it`s not so hard... But if you see it like I do, like this obligation we are forced to follow, than it is a torturing. The only way to change this is to manipulate yourself to see this as positive thing. You can google how to do it...
e.g. http://www.lifehack.org/articles/lifestyle/change-the-way-you-see-work-and-change-your-life.html or http://www.ehow.com/how_5186326_change-way-thinking.htm
That must be exhausting! Are you in the UK? If youre diagnosed with a disorder you might have a right to help in the workplace.Lily
It might just be that the stress has got too much and you need a week or 2 to recharge your batteries, at the end of the day if the pressure doesn't stop soon you will end up quite ill and where will your employer be then?
Try not to worry about the money too much either, It will all be ok!
Hugs