Hole in condom - birth control - what are the chances PLEASE RESPOND!

[alwaysworrying511]

So I had sex with a woman twice a couple nights ago and and we used 2 condoms.
The next morning I looked at the condoms and one of them had a hole near the tip area (little bit on the side, not directly on the tip) and a hole at the base. I saw there was some possible pre-*** in the condom still.

-i didn't ***
-she assured me i wore a condom the whole time
-she is on birth control, using the IUD
-she also took a morning after pill about 24 hrs after
-she said it feels like she's going to have her period any day / very soon

What are the chances she is pregnant? I'm freaking out and can't stop thinking about it!!!

please respond. thank you

[Anonymouse88]

You're welcome.  I hope everything turns out well!

[alwaysworrying511]

I appreciate all of your answers. Thank you.

[Anonymouse88]

I'm honestly not sure if a period this soon after sex says anything about pregnancy, but it shouldn't matter.  The IUD makes the uterus inhospitable to an embryo by thinning the lining, which keeps the embryo from implanting and growing.  It also thickens the cervical mucus, making it hard for sperm to even reach an egg.  It's hard to tell exactly when you ovulated (this often requires daily temperature checks or other physiological measurement), but again, with an IUD, it shouldn't matter.  She can always talk to a healthcare provider if she's worried, but it really is an effective birth control method on its own, far more effective than condoms alone.

[alwaysworrying511]

I see. Yeah, makes sense, thanks for the answer.

She said she had her period, but it's only been about 3 days since we had se*, so is that too soon or close of a time to miss a period?. Also, she said she had already ovulated so we were safe. ?

[Anonymouse88]

The pill is easier to get pregnant on because it requires you to take it at the same time each day and not forget any days to be properly effective.  The IUD requires no effort on the part of the user other than periodically verifying it's still there by feeling the threads, so it's hard to screw up.  It also acts directly in the uterus to prevent pregnancy.  

And just bear in mind that you will find more unsatisfied people on the internet.  Far more people who have had something fail will post about it online than people who have had something work.  Therefore, you should expect a bias towards bad effects when asking about things on the internet, especially medications.  (How many times has someone spontaneously said, "My IUD has worked perfectly, I haven't gotten pregnant in four years"?)

[alwaysworrying511]

Thanks for the answer.
But I'm still worrying because I keep reading posts on here with people saying they have gotten preg. while either on the pill or with an IUD.

but i understand that the IUD is the most effective type of bc.

[Anonymouse88]

I'd be more worried about STDs from that than pregnancy.  Plenty of people use an IUD as their only method of contraception, and there's a less than 1% chance per YEAR of accidental pregnancy if you do that.  A one time exposure to sperm, while not entirely impossible, is extremely unlikely to cause pregnancy in someone with an IUD.  Add in the morning after pill, and the chances go down even more.  Also, precum is much less likely to get someone pregnant than full out ejaculate is.  So you should maybe both get tested  for STDs (good idea to do on a regular basis if you've been changing partners, either through dating multiple people at once or one after another), but I wouldn't worry about pregnancy.

[alwaysworrying511]

What about the hole in the condom? It was like a tear more than a hole.

[alwaysworrying511]

thanks for the answer.

anyone else have any opinions?? thanks.

[Anonymouse88]

If she's got an IUD, even completely unprotected sex would have a less than 1% chance of getting her pregnant (although condoms are always good to protect against STDs).  Condom + not cumming + IUD + morning after pill = I think it would make news headlines if she managed to get pregnant.  The Mirena IUD can cause you to stop having periods or have lighter ones, so in the absence of pregnancy symptoms, don't worry if that happens, especially if she's had it a while.  You can ask a doctor at what point a home pregnancy test would be able to detect a pregnancy, and if you're still super worried, she can take one at that time (they don't work before a certain point).  I add the disclaimer that I am not a doctor, and if you have any doubts you should talk to one in person.

An important note is that you should NEVER use two condoms at once (using one, taking it off and using another is of course fine).  Looking again, it seems that you did the latter, but it doesn't hurt to hear the safety tip again.  You should also never combine a female condom with a male condom.  This is because the condoms rub on each other and increase the risk of breakages.  You should also avoid using anything with oil in it as lube (e.g. crisco, vaseline, olive oil, mineral oil, etc.), because oil degrades latex and makes it more likely to break.  Silicone or water based lubricants are the way to go (e.g. astroglide).