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Avatar universal

10 yo masturbating.

Hi there.
I have a little problem with my 10 year old daughter.
About a month ago i caught her while she was “riding/straddling” this toy horse.
I told her to stop it torturing her horsy because she was about to break it.
you see this toyhorse is battery powered and is able to walk by it self but she was obviously too heavy for it as she kept stalling the mechanism.
but according to her it could hold her just fine and told me to get lost.
I figured she was just fouling around with it so i tried to forget about it.
a few week after while i was cleaning her room i found this horse stuffed away behind her closet and as i reached for i could smell this poo smell.
I cant think of any other way to describe it and it came from the toyhorse itself.
The thing is that it is a stuffed toy and because its battery powered i couldn't wash it but my daughter wanted to keep it no matter what.
she also keeps asking me for battery’s and last week it broke down and now she’s asking for a new one.
So i think she uses it to masturbate with and i am not sure what to do next.
Its not that she is masturbating although i do think she is a little young for that as well but its the way she does it that concerns me the most.
for instance why would this thing smell like poo? shouldn't it smell like urine instead?
Could she have some kind of digestion problems?
Could she get an infection by doing this?
Now she wants to have new one and i cant get it in her head thats she’s way too heavy for it and that she probably breaks this one as well, because the legs of the old one were al bend outwards because of her weight.
The thing is i cant just say i wont give u one because i think you do dirty things with it? can i?
This is becoming a serious problem so i could use some advice.

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Avatar universal
She is getting to the age where she needs to know what is and is not appropriate behavior according to your family standards.   My family is religious so we look down on this type of behavior as degrading but we do allow appropriate learning where we talk to the child and help them them discover truth by means of asking questions.   This is a skill we have had to learn and cultivate.

We help one another set worthwhile, age appropriate life goals to become the kind of people we want to be.   By focusing on the positive, it seems we've solved many a problem like this without having to address negative attributes, (which we ignore until they just go away).   That has worked for all 10 of our well adjusted children who now are grown with families of their own.
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Avatar universal
lol i'm sorry but that is funny
just tell her it's time to get rid of it, it can't be washed and you need to be able to wash it because of dust mites
then drop the subject
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2 Comments
definitely do not bring up masterbation. she can do it if she wants to. it's her body.
if she does it in front of you again, just be cool about it and be like - "do your thing, but it's a private thing - for real, don't need to see it" and then walk away. lol just something that is cool and laid back - avoid the shaming thing - not good
Avatar universal
It is normal for a young girl to masterbate. Most girls use their fingers or hand or a small stuffed animal or character. Even a pillow. But it is a private thing and it seems your daughter is keeping it private. She will have to find an alternative way to please herself. But you must talk to her and tell her it is a normal activity but a private activity. And she should not be ashamed of it. Tell her that she if very tender down there and could hurt herself if not careful. Also explain about using something clean. I sense she is going to do it with or with out your approval. Tell her you know it feels good and just basically tell her you understand. Also, no one else is to touch her except a doctor. Just talk in a matter of fact tone of voice.
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Avatar universal
Well this horse is originally meant to carry a small babydoll so it is not even meant for toddlers.
But she keeps telling me it broke down because she dropped it and not because she rides it.
She is expecting one for christmas and i’m heaving a hard time saying no because i’m kind of uncomfortable about talking about her masturbating with it.
As far as i know she is very clean at her genitals and she using loads of toilet paper so im not sure thats the problem.
I cant think of a clean and harmless alternative because of her age and i am not quite sure what she does with it.

Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I think the horse your talking about has a age limit and weight limit any way so just say no your not getting another they are for toddlers and she is to big. As far as masterbating most kids do this, maybe she is just not cleaning herself good when she uses the restroom maybe get wipes and suggest she uses them after going to the bathroom
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