Boys and weapons

[dragonfly1222]

My son is 15 and he has loved knives and weapons all of his life. He has air soft guns, paintball guns, and collects various swords and weapons, which he proudly displays in his room. He is not violent, in fact has been picked on through his early tween years and rarely ever engaged with the Pickers". He was in boy scouts for years, where he was taught proper handling of weapons, and how to respect them. He has never had an inappropriate incident with any of his weapons, other than wanting to show his collection to everyone/anyone he can.
He loves to play video games in his room, and loves things that have skulls, he loves punk rock and heavy metal music, has good grades, in-fact is in all honors classes in 8th grade. He presently wants to grow his hair long and dye it black, I wont let him do this.... but he lets me know he wants to and takes it good naturedly when I tell him he cant.
My husband, who has been my son’s stepfather for almost ten years, finds it disturbing that my son likes weapons, skulls, and things of this "dark" Nature. My Husband doesn’t understand why he can’t be "normal" and enjoy sports, and riding bikes, and "normal" things. I am writing to find out, what is normal for a 15 yr. old boy? Is my son normal for having a fascination with weapons and skulls? His birthday is also on Halloween, so he has always identified with the scary and skulls, and his biological dad is a punk type of person, with tattoos everywhere and piercings etc.... I think he is just trying to figure himself out, and should be accepted, and my husband seems to think there is something fundamentally wrong with my son, columbine types of problems..... Please advise?

[bigblues101]

Your son does have the right to like this kind of stuff and what he does doesnt hurt or kill anyone. also I say your son is normal for who he is and what he does as there are many people who do some of the same stuff like your son does.

[bigblues101]

Your son has the right to like this kind of stuff and he is also old enough for this. also I find it more like a discrimation that your husband wants to make him normal just because hes scared even if what your son does doesnt hurt or kill anyone.

[specialmom]

I have to completely agree with Sandman!  I went to college in the 80's . . . and little old conservative me dated a guy in a "heavy metal" band.  I could sing along with every metallica song.  Should I be embarressed?  No.  Musical preference says nothing about you.  His friends probably enjoy these things as well and all people being unique and different is what makes it interesting.  

After reading your response under another post, it sounds like you've worked hard to get your son to where he is now.  Good job, mom.  Remind your husband of how well he is doing and see if he can relate to him in any way.  Good luck.

[Sandman2]

    You don't worry when somebody collects things and exhibits them and proudly shows them off.  You do worry when somebody hides things and doesn't share.  You don't worry when somebody is in honors classes.  You do worry when somebody is failing school.
    Tell your husband he should go out paintballing with your son.  I did it a few years ago with my son when he was 23 and I was 62.  We had a ball and both survived to fight again.  Its kind of a different world now.  I remember when vampires used to be scary, not something to fall in love with.  Oh well.  
   Your kid sounds like someone I would have enjoyed having in class.  Life is too short not to share things and learn about things.  Both your husband and your son should share a bit more.  By the way, I found my son more understandable about his junior year in highschool.  Had something to do with maturity (not sure if it was his or mine), I think.
    Hair wise, as long as he is in your house, you kind of have a say in that.  It also is a great bargaining point for other things.  :)
enjoy!