Daughter with unusual behavior and temper

[rich]

I have a 5 1/2 year old, intellectually gifted daughter who is currently enrolled in kindergarten.  We have two issues with her: (1) She plays with unusual objects that she likes to "flip flop" - e.g., she'd rather play with a belt or a string or a piece of trash celophane than a doll or other toy.  She imagines the "flip flop" objects to be people.  Otherwise, her interactive behavior with others appears normal.  She enjoys playing with other children.  Almost every object she touches winds up going into or around her mouth as a sensory activity.  (2)  75% of the time, her emotional behavior is pleasant and appropriate.  She understands right from wrong very well.  However, when she does not get her way or is otherwise faced with disappointment (e.g., losing a game), she kicks, crys and screams like a toddler and can't get control of her emotions.  She'll say things like "I want new parents," "I want to live somewhere else," or "I don't like living" which are very disturbing to us.  Sometimes she'll tell other children that she doesn't like them when she is in this mode.  Note that both myself and my wife have had episodes of depression for which we've been treated.

Questions:  (1) Is this in a normal range - are we overreacting? (2) Should we be concerned about depression, OCD, or other related problems?  (3) Should we have her visit a psychologist?

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

Yes.

[rich]

What about the "flip flopping" play - okay for a 5 1/2 year old?

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

With a positve family history of mood disorder, your daughter is more at risk than would be a child without such genetic loading. However, your description of her prevailing mood as pleasant is a good sign. It is more likely that she is experiencing a normal spectrum childhood behavioral problem, triggered by her inability at this young age to manage the frustration and anger that comes when her wishes/wants are denied. As she develops, her ability to manage such frustration will improve. At this point, the benefit of speaking with a clinician would be to collaborate around a program of systematic behavior management and see if the way you are handling her behavior is useful.