Daughters rectal exploration

[ChrisandJ]

9y/o daughter discovered inserting objects in rectum twice over last 2 years. Has a history of mild constipation. Had discussion without scolding or shaming and questioned innapropriate touch by others of which she denies. Also explained dangers of inserting objects. I understand body exploration and sexual curiosity is normal but does this qualify as typical development behavior?

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

No. This behavior requires very firm limit setting. It is not safe. Let her know in no uncertain terms that it must stop. You know of two instances. There is no doubt it has occurred many more times than that.

[ChrisandJ]

I am VERY concerned as to why she would even consider doing this to herself. I have questioned her if anyone has ever touched her in this way. She has told me that no one has ever done this. I am going to take her to a child psychologist. I don't want to make her feel like she is a "bad person" but I am so worried about her. Any other advice or insight?

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

You were wise to ask her about how this might have occurred to her, but beyond that all you can really do is follow through with the evaluation and continue to set firm limits on the behavior. As parents we are sometimes left to wonder, in spite of all our efforts to learn what might have occurred or how a youngster's behavior came to be.

[ChrisandJ]

Thank you for your comments. I have met with a child psychologist this past week. My daughter will see her Monday and begin counseling. My daughter did tell me the night after it happened that she thought "something was wrong with her" and she "feels sad all the time". So...not to embarass her about the "rectal incident", I am telling her that she is meeting with a counselor to talk about her "worries".

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

Very good. You are doing the right thing.