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5082295 tn?1371250911

Four year old says she has no friends..but doesn't attend preschool..?

Hi all! Ok 1st Im not a mother, but my niece is 4 years old, uses better diction than I do & smart far passed her years! She also has a 1 year old sister. I have my psych degree but I dont have any clue or advice for my sister this time. My sister's a stay at home mother & today she was getting the girls ready to go to the park. Its been about a month since she quit her job to be home (they were being kept by my mom) so after the children would not listen to her today & running around like crazy & refused to get out the door, my sister got frustrated & went to the bathroom to sit for a minute to basically take a deep breath & recompose herself. As most moms know there are no breaks, so both kids go running in the bathroom bc of course that's where mommy is and the four year old out of no where says "I don't have any friends! You just don't understand" no one can figure out what she meant or why she said it. When her mom asked all she would do is repeat it. What could she really mean? She doesn't go to preschool, she tried half days but didn't work and now they don't have the money to put her in one. She has tons of cousins & at church named her 3 best friends. But its not like she's been anywhere to be rejected or kids not play with her on the playground etc...plus if kids are around she is the leader & they flock to her. I know this is lengthy but want the full & back story so all would know. Any ideas, advice to get her to talk, or could it be a reaction seeing her mom frustrated (not upset or mad just a regular over tired frustrated for a few moments mom)...thanks!
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189897 tn?1441126518
COMMUNITY LEADER
   With a 1 year old sister, Mom is going to spend a lot of time with the little one.  Leaving the older one on her own.  And for the last 3 or so years, she has had Moms full attention - so this is a change for her.   It sounds like she is tired of being left out.   And being a smart little girl, might be trying to manipulate Mom a bit.  Mom could try and set up some play dates with other kids?  But with winter coming getting outside is gonna get harder.
    There is also a series of books aimed at this age group that might help.  they are meant to be read aloud to them.  One example is "When I feel Worried".  It and other suggestions can be found here - http://www.amazon.com/When-Feel-Worried-The-Books/dp/0807588954/ref=pd_sim_14_5?ie=UTF8&dpID=51povvur3EL&dpSrc=sims&preST=_AC_UL160_SR126%2C160_&refRID=112GDMPWBM00R7J1H64B
   Of course, just the simple act of reading to her will help.  But, the more that Mom can do to get her involved - the more I think it will help.   Get those cousins and kids in the church group involved too.  
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5082295 tn?1371250911
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