My 11 year old daughter seems to have inherited my explosive anger. I'm worried. What is wrong with her?

[Abbigail_Perkins]

Does she (and I) have a mental disorder? Is it some kind of disease? Am I doing something wrong. She gets good grades. She is anti-social, but I wonder if she needs someone her own age to teach her. But I worry that she'll hurt someone.

[Abbigail_Perkins]

I get angry, but I haven't had fits of random anger in years (about 15) wich is how she acts. I have been careful NOT to explode on her

[Abbigail_Perkins]

No, she acts like I did when I was her age. I haven't acted like her in years and she's never seen my anger. Around her and her brothers I have never acted like she does.

[RockRose]

Your title is startling,  abbigail.  "My daughter is like me,  what's wrong with her".  

I agree with the others that the first step is to get a handle on your explosive anger,  learn to control yourself,  and you can better parent her and teach her how to handle her own inappropriate anger.

[margypops]

Totally agree , children learn from us all the time , they copy us, and if you have an explosive personality your children will have so if you learn to calm down so will she,if you explode at her, why wouldnt she return what you have taught her to do ..Good Luck  

[Abbigail_Perkins]

Thanks

[AnnieBrooke]

Some explosive anger comes from Borderline Personality Disorder, but some is simply learned behavior.  It is hard to say where yours comes from, but hers could be learned from you, and in response to you.  Why not see a therapist and take some anger-management courses, and see what they do for you and for the whole family dynamic?  If your daughter sees you actively trying to control your temper and learn better ways of handling anger, she might learn a lot from your example.  (Note:  Kids learn nothing from what we say, but they learn a lot from us, because they learn from what we do.)