My 5yr old has done 12hrs solid since the day she was born but all of a sudden in the last 2-wks she has come into my room between 1am & 3.30am to tell me something (bad dream, can't sleep etc) and wants to get into my bed... I took her back to bed last night at 1am (I forewarned her of this before bedtime) and then I couldn't get back to sleep until 5.30am! Not sure how much longer this can go on but im determined not to give in.. Any ideas?
I do not know about spraying febreeze at bedtime....would give me a headache:)
Anyway, kidding aside
Once my sone starts to fall off the bedtime vagon, we go ahead and draw a schedule - divide a piece of paper by 6 squares and doodle a "step" in each one
We had snack - playtime - bath - game before bed - reading - bed or something along these lines.....
Worked magic, I could not beleive how easy it made things.....
Of course, it only applies to getting in bed
Middle of the night - be firm and put her back, I've started with giving my son a hug, proceeding to holding his hand, then moving a foot away, and now if he wakes up - I can put him right back in bed, give him a kiss and - he is snoozing....
be prepared to invest a few sleepless nights into this (sounds like you do not sleep anyway)
Good luck
I think what may of also added to her fears is that both yourself and your husband has endulged the fear with sprays etc... saying that the spray will keep anything scary away from her has only fuled this belief that there are scary things in the dark and they can get her. I totally understand why you would do this, so she will feel more protected but in truth you are saying to her that monsters exsist.
So how to help her, well it may help a great deal if when you take her up to bed if you keep the bedroom door fully open, with both the landing light on and put a lamp in her room so she has a nice soft light so she isn't laying there in the dark. Also once you have read her a story etc, take a chair and sit in her room, do not engage in conversation with her, if she talks to you tell her its time to sleep. Then stay in her room until she falls asleep. Then each night after put the chair slightly closer to the door until after a few days/week you are sitting out side the room, while outside the room close the door slightly so she can not directly see you but so she know's you are there. Then start to break down the time that you sit on the chair, so night one 20mins, night two 18mins, night three 15mins and so on..... by the time you have got to the stage where you no longer are sitting outside her room she should have settled back into a secure night time routine and feel safe and secure once again.
This technique is proven to work and is used by child psychologists in their practice for children with bedtime anxiety. Let us know what happens if you decide to try it out... all in all it should take a couple of weeks to complete, some parents feel this is a long time to endulge their child in this bedtime routine but i tell them that it would be far better to complete this than have thier child in a complete state of terror each night which in severe cases can last for months and turn into a habit.
Kids imaginations become very vivid and I do believe they actually become scared. They want their parents comfort and that is natural. BUT . . . we all need our sleep. I'm super firm on bedtime issues. My now 6 year old never slept with us but became really good at putting off his bedtime. He would get tired and cranky. I would point out this every time through out the day saying------ when we are tired, we have bad days. We need to get our sleep. I'd act out being grumpy or clumsy or something and say, oh, I didn't get enough sleep last night. We need to get our sleep. My kid really got that correlation which has helped a LOT. He plays in his room for about 5 minutes and then I say, Okay. Time for bed so we can have a good day tomorrow.
It wasn't always like that . . . So here is what I would do. I would be empathetic but keep conversations of her being scared to a minimum and don't go overbourd with the sympathy thing because it feeds the problem. Get her a nightlight and a fan (to mask small noises that might wake her during the night). Have a nice bedtime routine and then be firm. Go to bed. If she gets up, keep all conversation to a minimum. Say it is okay, you are fine. Go to bed. And walk her back. Never ever let her sleep with you or you will perpetuate the problem. Even at 6 am, back to her room. I'd also give up the naps. That is just me. I had my kids napping until this school year---- My son was 5 and his brother was 4 when we gave it up. My 5 year old didn't need it every day and on days he that he took one, night time was harder. He goes to bed much earlier now that he doesn't have the nap. just my opinion.
So good luck. I'm sure it will blow over!!! You'll all be well rested soon.