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Six year old holding her bowels?

I need advice on how to determine if my child has a physical issue or is just holding her poop. She is almost six and still does not go regularly unless she is told to sit on the toilet. For example, today was day three that she didn't go. She woke up and peed but didn't poop. Two minutes later, her dad suggested she go poop and then she did. When I asked why she didn't go before, she said she didn't feel like she had to. She has told us that sometimes she doesn't want to stop what she's doing but she has also said other times that she doesn't feel when she needs to go. Her bowel movements could be three to four days apart or everyday or every other day. She always went at least once if not twice a day when in diapers. I believe she is holding in her poop as a control mechanism and because she doesn't want to stop what she's doing. I can't figure out whether this is an issue I should be concerned with or is this normal for a six year old and I'm just making her crazy talking about it so much. When she doesn't go regularly, which is often, I worry to the point of obsessing over it. When I mentioned it to her pediatrician, he just brushed me off and said if she goes every three days it's normal. I know every three days is normal for some but I'm not convinced that is the case for my daughter. I am ultimately worried that if this is not corrected, she will any g.i. Issues as she gets older.
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4851940 tn?1515694593
Do preserve and keep reminding your daughter to go to the toilet, especially when she starts to let wind or starts to fidget a lot.

If you do this on a regular daily basis, she may get into a good routine.
Do remember that it does not mean there is anything wrong if she does not go every day.  This will depend on what she has eaten, drunk and her physical exercise.  But if you start to notice that the stools are very hard and she is straining, any mucus or blood on the stools, then you do need to get further help.

Some children can get hard stools if they eat some types of chocolate.  So do keep a diary of what she eats to see if there is anything that is making her stools hard.  All soft fruit (especially grapes),  apples, oranges, are all brilliant at getting the bowels to move.  Sweet corn and cabbage is another good bowel mover.  

I do not know what fiber gummies are.  I have never heard of them in the UK any.  May be she has become too reliant on the fiber gummies (?).  Offer her move fruit like grapes and also drinks - does not have to be juices all the time, water is also very good for all of us no matter what age.

Best wishes.
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Avatar universal
I actually give her fiber gummies everyday. She also eats a good amount of vegetables and fruit but she definitely doesn't drink enough and we are working on that. The thing is I don't believe her BMs hurt because she never complains about it. When she does go three days, I show her how different the poop looks so she realizes going everyday is better. Obviously it's not clicking.
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4851940 tn?1515694593
It is very normal for children to deliberately hold on to their poop exactly for the reasons that you mentioned.  That they don't want to stop what they are doing because they are so engrossed or don't want to miss anything, like when watching a TV programme.

Most children do feel and understand the sensations that they get and know that they should go to the toilet to empty their bowels and do go.  Other children will choose to ignore it.  The problem with this is that the "poop" gets dry and then becomes hard and uncomfortable to pass.  When this happens it can be painful to pass the hardened faeces and that then causes the problem that the child tries to avoid going again when they feel the urge.

Sometimes, a child does not understand what feelings they should experience when the bowel needs to be opened.  When my grandson was 7 he asked me the question of how does he know that he has to go to empty his bowels.  He too had a habit of holding on and having mishaps in his underwear because he could not then get to the toilet in time and was not ale to hold on any longer.  We had to constantly remind him to go.

Make sure your daughter has plenty of fibre rich foods, like fresh fruit and veg and breakfast cereal.  Some children like normal porridge and that is a good option or you can get RedyBrek in plain and chocolate flavours.  Make sure that she also gets plenty of fluids.  With eating lots of fibre, your body also needs to have lots of fluids too as well as not to get dehydrated.

Observe her and if you see her fidgeting or letting wind, do keep reminding her to go to the toilet.  If she is engrossed in what she is doing, you will have to be firm and insist she goes and tell her than she can carry on with what she is doing when she finishes on the toilet.  With television programmes, sometimes you can pause the programmes or you may just have to switch the TV off.

Should you notice that the stools are very hard, any signs of blood or mucus on the stools (which can sometimes happen even in a child), then get back to the doctor.

Best wishes.
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5914096 tn?1399918987
I wouldn't second guess this issue.  If you are concerned, then have your child evaluated immediately by the pediatrician.  If there is a medical issue at stake, it is best to have it addressed now.
Helpful - 0
189897 tn?1441126518
COMMUNITY LEADER
       Three days is normal?  That's news to me!   Have you tried introducing more fiber into her diet?  
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