I told my ex that I wanted a divorce in April '09. My kids and I prepared to move out because my ex thought he should get the house. My kids knew my now husband for quite awhile before we moved in July '09. Between July and August of '09, my children had to watch their biological father try to assault me in front of them. My ex ignored my girls for the next 3 months without so much as a phone call. Both of my girls were not happy when they had to start going back to their real dad's house, and this is when the behaviors started. the divorce was finalized in march of 2010. I didn't get married until Sept. 2010, and their baby brother came a month earlier.
I find it hard to swallow that you seem to suggest that the kids and I should have stayed in that abusive household. We moved for safety, and the girls have done fine up until they have had to deal with so many different women at their real dad's house. Everytime they bond with someone and expect to see them again in two weeks, it doesn't happen. I would think that having a woman living in his home and a g/f who comes and goes, would be confusing for my kids. I'm sorry you feel that way, but I am not the one who has random women in and out of my home during my time with my kids.
Hinder, within ONE YEAR, you have a new husband and a son after your divorce.
That's crazy fast, for your daughters to adjust to. I would think that would be more than enough to give her an "adjustment disorder". Out with dad, in with this guy, and here's the new baby.
I think maybe you should stop blaming your ex husband for everything wrong with this child, and consider your life example.
I have sole physical custody of both of my girls, with the exception of my ex's scheduled visitation. I'm hoping that with my ex's refusal to co-parent or communicate when issues/concerns arise, that the counselor will be able to give recommendations. If I end up going back to court because of this, then I guess I'll have to. Also, my daughter has said that when she does go to her dad's, "his g/f is always there" and then rolls her eyes and gets quiet.
@margypops My daughter is 5 yrs. old. It's not about the nail polish, it's about the fact that she is bottling up her emotions. She recently saw a counselor who evaluated her as having "adjustment disorder" due to the recent open door policy my ex has. Her outbursts are being expressed by her biting, hitting, etc. My ex is no longer providing a stable atmosphere for her. She has tried to express her concerns to her dad, but he dismisses them. Also, at a school program that he brought his current girlfriend to, the g/f flocked right to my daughter, calling her sweetheart and not giving her personal space. Right after this, my daughter went to my dad, who was also there. She wanted to be picked up, and didn't want to be put down.
If you have sole physical custody, are you saying you don't have to send the kids to their dad but you do anyway? Given that he can't be trusted on the ladies-from-the-Internet front, why are you sending them to him? Having a weekend of child care is not worth distressing the kids.
Its a difficult situation for you and I do understand how you feel ,thing is its his time with the child you may have to put up with it, unless they do sometime that the courts dont approve of, and I doubt nail varnish comes into it.You can always tell your daughter to say 'No thank you ' how old is your daughter ? Her seeing a counselor is a good idea and you will also get some feed back from another source .Good Luck