my two year old wont sleep

[haley1978]

My two year old girl just will not sleep. when i put her to bed she lets me read a story and i lay with her until she sett;es then as soon as i go to get up she screams. and i mean she screams to the point of being sick. sometimes intentionally. She will stay at her door screaming for hours. this can start at around 8pm until  4 or 5 in the morning. She makes up numerous excuses for me to go up to her, like needing the toilet or being sick, but its all just attention seeking as when i do go up she stops crying straight away.
I'm at my wits end. my 11 year old cant get any sleep because of the noise and i'm constantly stressed out. its not even that she sleeps during the day. i've tried letting her doze and ive tried keeping her awake. nothing helps. what can i do?

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

Yes, you are correct. Now tuck her in, beforehand tell her what is expected, and it's OK to check in a few minutes. But don't actually stay with her, because that will result in the same problem that occurs when you lie down with her.

[haley1978]

I understand completely what you're saying. i never used to lay down with her, and to be honest, i cant remember why i started it! How do i get her used to sleeping on her own then? do i sit in the room? or just read her a story, tuck her in then leave? I have booked some time off work around the 24th April. and have arranged for my oldest to stay with a friend. So really want to be prepared for getting her settled. The cot she was in has been sold, so i'll have to keep her in the bed. but she did sleep in it ok for ages, ive obviously just trained her to need me more havent i?

[Kevin Kennedy, Ph.D.]

Here's the problem. You have 'taught' her that she needs you to be with her in order for her to fall asleep. Now she is simply responding to what she has learned. It's important that you braek that habit. Do not lie down with her. She needs to be falling asleep by herself. You will have to bite the bullet, so to speak, but if you are persistent she will make the change. So you can see what i am saying: she will change to the extent that you can change. Also, when you mentioned that your daughter stays at her door, I infer from that that she is in a toddler bed already. If so, you made the move too early. Children that young are not ready to be in a bed. It complicates the situation a lot.