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Had sex with 2 different guys who is father?

My LMP was Nov 18th my cycle is every 24-26 days. I had sex with guy #1 on Nov 22 and guy #2 on Nov 28. My ultrasound on Jan 9th said I'm 7 weeks +/-6 days and I'm due Aug 22nd. Who is the father?
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134578 tn?1614729226
COMMUNITY LEADER
November 29 would be the suggested conception date for an August 22 due date.
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134578 tn?1614729226
COMMUNITY LEADER
So I'm looking at November 29 (which comes from your estimated due date), and looking at your ultrasound on January 9 saying 7 weeks " +/- 6 days." If it was at the "plus 6 days" that would take conception back to November 29.

Do you know anything about why your doctor said +/- 6 days? That is an unusually large margin for error for a seventh-week ultrasound. Usually so early in pregnancy the margin for error is only given as +/- 1 day or 2 days.
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No I do not know why I was given the +/-6 days. It was at a pregnancy center. I have not seen an OB yet. It was also a trans vaginal ultrasound.
I'd get in as soon as possible to see an OB, and ask them for an ultrasound immediately, even if it means you have to explain that you are trying to decide between two guys as the dad. You want to be certain they don't use your first day of last period to try to compute conception. Be very clear to them that your menstrual months are short compared to average and a count based on a 28-day menstrual month will not be helpful. And get the ultrasound soon, because the later in the pregnancy (even in these early weeks) the less accurate they get for purposes of dating conception. (This is because though all babies begin as one cell and divide into two the next day and then four the next, once several weeks have gone by they begin to diverge with some growing faster and some growing slower than average and others going right along with average. So by week 12, the margin for error really is a whole week, when in week 7 it's usually only 1 or 2 days.) If the doctor refuses to do an ultrasound, get a different doctor. Sometimes its an insurance thing, offer to pay out of pocket. It really matters to get an ultrasound now, or by your 8th or 9th week at the very latest.

If that can't happen, use the due date the pregnancy center gave you. It does tie in with what would be a normal ovulation date for someone with 24-26 day menstrual months. I would be pretty confident in your shoes that guy 2 is the dad.
134578 tn?1614729226
COMMUNITY LEADER
In any case, it's hard to think of any factors that would suggest the first guy is the dad, with the only possible exception that you have relatively short menstrual months. (I.e., if they are 24 days, you would ovulate around day 10, and if they are 26 days, you would ovulate around day 12.)

If we were to create an example using the shortest scenario to test the situation, you would ovulate at 10 days, which would have been November 28, and sperm from November 22 would need to be still viable after 6 days in your reproductive tract. This long of a lifespan for sperm is said by some (but not all) research to be possible, but other research suggests that by the time sperm is six days old, it is not strong enough to penetrate the egg anyway.

This means the parts of the situation that do not favor the first guy are that the farthest out scenario involving a 24-day menstrual month still does not quite point to him, and you don't always have 24-day menstrual months anyway, sometimes they are 26 days. And, sperm isn't too mighty by then if it is even still alive. And, your doctor did an ultrasound and saw and measured the actual embryo, and told you that your due date is August 22, which points to getting pregnant on November 29. And, you had sex on November 28 with lots of new sperm that would penetrate the egg with ease.

I'd say, probably the ultrasound that said your conception date was November 29 was correct, and if your conception date was November 29, that points pretty much only to guy #2. In your shoes, I'd go through the pregnancy pretty certain he was the dad, and would get DNA tests done with both guys once the baby was born just so you will never wonder, and then forget it forever.
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18 Comments
My previous period dates are Oct 26th, Oct 2nd and Sept 9th. Would that help any with cycle lengths? I also get cramps in the middle of my cycle and figured that was ovulation cramps. I felt this on Nov 30th.
It really all sounds like November 29 or 30 was indeed when conception was, and that would rule out guy 1.
Thank you so much.  I was extremely worried. I didn't think it was guy #1 I still had my period a day after sex on Nov 22nd
And just incidentally, since it sounds like you are saying all the sex was unprotected, while you're at your ob/gyn's, arrange to get the gamut of STD tests done too. Sorry to have to bring it up, but better to check than to find out something after a lot of time has passed.
Oh, regarding the comment you just posted, when your period ends is not actually significant, it's when it begins. One woman might have all the endometrium rush out in three days, and another might have it leisurely trickle out over 7 days. What matters is when the body put out the signal to start letting it go.

In any case, get another vaginal ultrasound from your regular ob/gyn, and get an estimated due date from that doctor. Don't get too hung up in the "weeks pregnant" figure, since it is not that helpful for women with shorter menstrual months. Get the estimated due date that is computed from the crown-to-rump measurement of the embryo seen on the ultrasound. Once you have the estimated due date, either put it into an online conception calculator, or just count back 266 days on a calendar, and that will tell you your estimated conception date. If it's lots different than the info you have already had, write back.
I did have an STDs screening all negative. I'm just nervous, guy 2 is my boyfriend
I assume the STD screenings were all after the various things would have manifested? If it was too close to the possible time of exposure, you might want to be totally sure by testing again later.

In your shoes, I would not be that nervous. I would assume that a DNA test is something to get done sooner or later, because you simply never want to wonder. But this is not because I would think there is a real chance that the first guy is the dad.

If you are going to have difficulty if you have to ask your boyfriend to do a test, you could do what some of the women who have written in here do. Instead of asking, they act like they assume a DNA test will be done. They say to their boyfriend that of course a DNA test will be done when the baby comes, just so HE will never have to wonder, since they are not married and no guy should ever have to wonder.  In other words, their pose is that they are doing it for him, for his peace of mind. If you can carry that off, you should be able to get the test done with no fuss at the hospital when the baby is born. (I think one woman even told her boyfriend it was a requirement.) No matter how you get to the testing, though, you do owe it to the baby to test and to reach a positive on a test, not to avoid it. I don't think you have much to worry about, but I do think you need to know for thousand-percent sure.
I had another ultrasound yesterday at and it matches up with due date of August 22nd.  
It all sounds consistent. Be sure that you do test once the baby comes, so nobody will ever have to wonder again. But try not to worry.
I had another ultasound today. It says on pictures that ges age is 21w 1d. The ultrasound tech said the edd 8/22/18. doesn't add up with LMP of 11/18/19 I'm very confused. And when they were measuring the baby's body parts the ges age changes.
Sorry need is 8/22/19 lmp is 11/18/18
If you will read the whole thread again I think there is enough there for you to be able to figure this out.
Incidentally, you had an ultrasound on April 8, and today you had another one? Four days apart? Is everything OK?
I have a history of still births they wanted to double check. But I'm pretty sure I conceived the 29th
If you had an early ultrasound, that is the best evidence (given what can be known at this point) unless you were to do a prenatal DNA test. It sounds right that around the 29th is the day of conception no matter when your period began. I am sorry about your losses.
Thank you. Hoping for the best with this one. Got results from ultasound and it reads...
Date 4/12/19
Gestiinal age LMP 22w 1d date 11/08/18 EDD 08/25/19
(But that was input wrong, she must of misheard my  November 18th as November 8th)
U/S today 20w 6d
EDD 8/24/19

But the January 9th U/S said 7w 6d EDD August 22nd 2019 and I hear the earlier one is best.
So if conception was Nov 29th then guy 2 would be father, we had sex the 28th or 27th and guy1 was on the 22nd, his sperm probably wasnt there anymore.
It's a boy.
Yes, if conception was November 29, by then sperm from November 22 would be all dead or at least too old to be viable.  
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