Aa
Aa
A
A
A
Close
Avatar universal

I need to know of accurate results from ddc non invasive test.

This guy I was around forced me to have sex with him. I just met him that night. He did have a condom on I kept checking but I'm still scared that maybe he put a hole in it or something when he opend it with his teeth or another accident  happened. Hes not from this country and looking to be deported maybe he purposely  poked holes in maybe before I came ov or something. Which he swears he didnt but idk... I ended trying to just forget about it and move on. I got with my boyfriend 4 1/2 days later we had sex and he came inside me. Long story short  I ended finding out I'm  pregnant. So Instead of telling my boyfriend  what happened. I was too scared to tell him and potentially  cause more problems and put doubt in his head. I was worried  it could go completely  left and just in case didnt feel like zi should have to stick up fo you myself or even justify what happened. I just ended up pretending to be nice to this guy and had to beg him for a month to do a non invasive dna test  with ddc and they say the test is accredited  by aabb but I've read horror stories  about tests being inaccurate they test again after the baby was born. I got a negative  result with him but. I'm so scared they gave me the wrong results... the test didn't  even have names on it when it came back or show how they came back that way.. I'm scared I'll end up believing a lie and end up having this discusting guys baby instead of my boyfriend's. I don't  know what to think anymore.. has anyone done a test with ddc and got accurate results when the baby was born maybe even tested again after and did a reg DNA  test with them and got the same results?? I just wanted to add I've  had a lot of  backlash on here and comments  were deleted about why I didnt report him. I've been through this a few times and the embarrisment isnt worth everyone knowing and I know that these types of cases never go anywhere and hes leaving the country theres absolutely  no proof my word against his.So I just decided to try my hardest to be nice to get something  out of it. His dna so I could move on with my bf  and nobody would know about this embarrassing  situation  maybe after I got the results back I would be able to act like it didnt happen and move on.Now I'm trying to  but I'm scared about about my results and need some opinions.
1 Responses
Sort by: Helpful Oldest Newest
134578 tn?1693250592
COMMUNITY LEADER
I think that you made the right decision, to play along with him so you could get him to test. After a date rape like you described, and all the handstands you had to do to get his DNA test, of course you are correct in worrying that the courts will not prosecute effectively. They'll say that "your word against his" thing, and ask why you continued to be nice to him, and so on.

It's only natural that you will now have post-traumatic stress over the whole awful experience, made worse by having to keep it a secret. One thing I would do is write up the situation (or keep copies of this post and the others you wrote), naming his name and his country and anything else you have, just in case sometime in the future he gets arrested for forcing himself on someone else, and it happens that he is on trial for several such situations. You would be able to support some other woman who perhaps the courts would otherwise not believe. (Of course, if he is being deported to a country in which men never get arrested for this kind of behavior, that might never happen. But you simply never know.) Keep the record locked up somewhere, or burn it while hurling curses at him some day, whatever is most cathartic. You went through hell, and lots of women are with you on the decisions you made. You did NOTHING WRONG. It is NOT your fault. You have no reason to be embarrassed. He wronged you, and our world as it is structured also wrongs women in this situation. All you can do is know in your heart that it was wrong and you are not wrong.

This all said about post-traumatic stress, please realize that you are letting your anxiety settle on the paternity test because of the PTS, there really aren't legitimate reasons to feel the test is wrong. The DDC is a big outfit, and it does draw attacks from women who don't like their results (especially in the past, when this kind of testing was new). Probably some of the women were correct, and some of them wrong, in thinking that the test came up with the wrong answer. But a lot of that could have been issues with the chain of custody of the samples, or someone faking the test.  In the earlier days when prenatal testing was very new, there were more complaints. The interim lab (the one collecting the samples to send to the DDC) often was unfamiliar with the procedures, or guys would find a way to fake the test (before labs photographed the guy and his ID, which I think they all do now, guys might send a buddy in their place), or something in the chain of custody would go wrong. But this is almost all gone now. Unless you think this a*s*s managed to fake the test, I would trust the test. The worst labs have dropped out of the picture, and those that are left really do have good reputations. (I suppose you are aware that the DDC does all those tests on Maury and other shows? Not that I'm up for those shows, but TV shows have deep enough pockets that they would get sued all the time if they announced someone was the dad and he wasn't. They aren't stupid, they won't have used the DDC for this kind of work if they thought they could be sued for false results.)

My suggestion is that you read up on post-traumatic stress, and its effect on things that the person never thinks will pop up. It comes out in the form of not being able to sleep, not believing a man who says something, etc. etc. and stuff that isn't even so directly obvious as a way to worry about the event that happened. And talk to a therapist if you can about the date rape, and your choices afterward. Do NOT buy anyone trying to tsk-tsk you about not reporting it. It's like when someone gets held up at gunpoint and they hand over their valuables rather than fighting. She did what she had to do in order to live, in a situation in which some people do not come out alive. You made the intelligent choice to get what you needed from this creep, and nobody should shame you for it.
Helpful - 0
50 Comments
Thank you so much for helping me you are so kind. You sound like you are confident in what you are talking about and you do make alot of sense.  are you a professional that knows about genetic science or like a genetic counselor or something?  You are absolutely right though  I do have ptsd and I am super scared just the thought of it being his baby ruinning my relationship and having to be in that situation alone with pos..I'm not sure what that could possibly  do to mine and my and my sons relationship and would rather just not take it that far to be in it to find out. As sad as I am to say that. I couldnt imagine anyone other than the guy I care about and not someone that did that to me. I do know my mind has been playing tricks on me Its been really hard pregnancy I am 15 hoing on 16 wks and have stresses unfortunately the whole time. Praying to god every day that it's not this guys and its my bfs . I've always dreamed of having my bfs baby so it would make me verry happy..My fingers are def crossed. Also It took a lot but I managed to convince that guy to go with me to get swabbed and them do the bloodwork on me so I did get to see them swab him so he couldn't have faked it and im guessing if there wasnt enough dna from him then they wouldn't gave me a result Idk but he wouldnt give him his real name or any info on him at all just the swab so it scares me I still dont know his last name all I know is his first and that he's from egypt..so if anything goes left I will absolutely end up in a situation with no help no chiled support and a baby by a guy I cant stumach and has put me in a nightnare. I do know that ddc they do paternity court shows and Maury but in my mind for some reason has been telling me maybe they do extensive testing testing for the courts and those shows and treat it more sensitively to make sure they get it right for them and maybe wont take the same precautions with someone like me cause they have so many to do all the time they might get careless. I definitely have ptsd and I'm going to try to see a counselor for this to get better.Thank you once again for taking your time to talk to me because I need all the help I can get to make a sound decision on what I'm going to do.. The one good thing was that they told me I was having a boy and they got that part right so I do know they had to do some type of testing. You really are much appreciated. I will definately come on here to help anyone as much as I can after the baby is born if I find out if the results were correct or not.. you are great Thanks again. Cause its It's  been really stressful and hard for me every day I'm just really scared.
Do you think non invasive testing with ddc isnt as accurate  as when the baby is born? I'm sorry I just heard people saying it wasnt but ddc swears its blood work so it isnt. I apologize  for writing so much and asking. I'm calling a counselor  for my situation after I'm done posting this. I told my friend the story and she thinks that because the had a condom on and because I was so scared and kept checking to make sure it was dry and on that I should be in the clear like you said. Just  freaks me out that people say they arent affective always but I'm trying here lol.. Thanks again.
It sounds like you did a good job, going with him and watching him swab, and once the swab is in their hands I have no doubt that (as you say) if there was a problem, the report you got back would have said the type of problem. It wouldn't make a false claim about the guy.

I don't want to make things any worse, and in your shoes I would believe the test from the DDC. And counseling is definitely the way to go, not more DNA testing. But if you simply cannot settle down and let this sink in, and if you are ruining your life with your boyfriend, (and if money is no object), you can get a "discreet" DNA test from Ravgen on your boyfriend, by sending them a swab you have rubbed on a drinking glass he has drunk from, or his toothbrush. I don't like to suggest it because when women are obsessing over the validity of a DNA test they often won't believe the second DNA test either, and then they are out all that money for nothing. Plus you have already had an answer that sounds totally valid, after all, you watched him do the swab and they were right about the baby's gender. But you have also been through so much trauma that I wanted you to know that a discreet test does exist.

Please see the counselor as soon as possible. It might be that you'll just cry through the whole first appointment  but it can still be comforting even so, and you do get somewhere in a surprisingly few visits.
I am also thinking, you should get more information about the guy before he is deported, if you can. This would be in case you ever do want to file a police report. His deportation records should be a matter of law, and you should be able to get a copy. Do you have access to legal help?
Thank you so much you are very helpful I was wondering and just asking about the accuracy of while pregnant or testing when the baby is out cause I believe I read a post about you talking about the accuracy  of non invasive or regular dna testing but I was a little confused  on what you thought. They did say that it's just as accurate  but that's ddc saying that. I know you believe in it for the most part though or you wouldnt say that to me and I am feeling a little more comfortable. I'm not there completely yet though but after I talk to my counselor  as well I've decided to put it to rest. Ty
I do think the test you had is accurate. But all this talk about the test has skipped a question I usually ask, and that is, could you explain how you are so sure that the baby was conceived in the short, unpleasantly eventful time period you described? Were you on ovulation test strips at the time? I'm thinking that we should have gone over that, just to be sure all this grief and worry about the test isn't all for nothing if you conceived earlier or later.
Yes I was testing my ovulation and I knew my ovulation day was coming soon that's why I was so scared  and even though he had a condom on  I managed to keep  reaching down to make sure It was dry and still  on and it was but it scares me cause  it was on a fri at 3 in the am.. then I tried to move on and forget about it and wanted to be with my boyfriend. I thought I would at the time be in the clear from this guy then my mind took over after I found out I was preg. I spent the   night with my boyfriend Wed night and checked my ovulation  that day and I was. W oak had sex at 1 in the am. I found out I was preg wks later. At first I was excited  then I started thinking about it and I started to get scared. That's  when I started doing research and decided to get the prenatal test with ddc. I was happy with the results but considering I told the lady what happened  and that the test results came back with no names on it cause it was for a peace of mind test. I started to wonder if the test got mixed up or if the test was as accurate  as when the baby was born or if they even take the same precautions  when they test for the courts and go through the same process or not to make sure it's  accurate

I thought I would be ok cause the condom but then kept worrying  if I missed something  with the condom and somehow something  happend I wasnt ovulating till some says later but I hear sperm can live inside you till you ovulate but  I did feel like I was dry on the inside of me after but I cant be 1000 percent sure. It's  just too close for comfort for me and the the thought of it coming out his after all this is done will ruin my life and I started having anxiety and developed ptsd  over the months
Im not sure but someone told me just now .I shouldn't  worry cause I wasnt ovulating yet on top of everything   but Idk what to think about it being only 3  or 4 days before. I would have to count up 24 hrs every day till I get to the time I had sex with my boyfriend to know for sure how many days it was I was thinking 4 but it could be closer to 3 because I had sex so early in the night those days  
Did you have an ultrasound at your first or second doctor appointment?
They said I was too early when I first went  so they waited almost 2 wks later. They said on the calendar that my conception date is saying Wed the 15th That's the night I was with my bf.. but then again idk if there was anything in there from that other guy. Smdh
I'm sorry I meant to put Jan Wed the 15th
And the due date that they gave you is what?
Oct 7th I believe they said
And that was on the day of the first ultrasound? Do you happen to remember how many weeks gestational age they said you were at that time?
(I mean, the first ultrasound in which they could see the embryo, not the one where they said it was too early.)
I will call in the morning to see if  for sure that is the date. I believe so though.  I am  also going to ask the date that I had the the actual ultrasound. I might have it on my calendar  though I'll go check
Unfortunately, I have to leave right now. (This is par for the course with a volunteer-based site.) I'll come back and look for your answer in about three hours.
It will help to have the exact day on which they first told you an estimated due date. It sounds like you're saying you had sex with Mr. Criminal on the 11th and then sex with your boyfriend on the 15th, and that the due date they gave you (at how early was that ultrasound in weeks?) suggested those two were in the time window for when you got pregnant. It's ALWAYS worth checking these things more than once. Will be back. :)
I didn't  have the second one marked but I am curious now too so I defenately will let you know in the morning after I talk to them cause I would like to hear what you have to say and your thoughts. When I got an ultrasound  at the hospital too they said the 15th was consumption  as well but when I just put that  due date on a website it said the 14th and I wasnt with my ex yet so hopefully the dates are wrong. That kind of made me nervous a little of course smh lol
Ok Thank you and I will for sure know in the morning to let you know cause I really would like to check it out again too now
Thank you so much for helping me with this and being here for me and yes I met him late Fri night the 13th and it happened  3 am in the early early morn Sat and was with my bf Wed the 15th but had sex at 1 in the morning
Think a bit, sweetie, no month has a "late Fri night the 13th" and a Wed the 15th. Do you mean "late Fri. night the 11th" above?
My apologies You are right. I meant like it happened it was in the middle of the night that's what I meant. So Fri was the day that guy came around I met him and then that incident happened  at 3:am. Early Sat morn. Later that coming Wed I went to my bfs  but slept with him at 1 am so early early Thurs morn.  Idk why I confuse  things sometimes when I explain them. I'm sorry,  I just called my Obgyn though and they will be calling me soon to let me know when that ultrasound  date was and everything  else
Hey, They told me my ultrasound date was Feb 19th 2020 and my due date is Oct 7th 2020 she said also that my conception  date was the 14th then the 15th so that part didnt really help me out cause I was only with my bf the 15th so if it was the 14th then it would've  been that other guy. Ugh gross.. ..Fingers crossed. I actually prayed on it when I got off the phone.
At what point in pregnancy did they tell you that you were you on February 19? Counting on my fingers I get about what, 8 weeks?
Sorry, 6 weeks?
The conception calculator I use says the 15th. Why do you think the doctor's office said 15th and then 14th, was she looking at information from a later ultrasound? (Did she know why you needed to know?) I ask because information from a 6th-week ultrasound is going to be more precise for estimating the date of conception from the size of the baby than later ultrasounds, since embryos grow at different rates. If she saw a later estimate that suggested the 14th, it wouldn't be as useful as the first ultrasound's information for this purpose.
Did the doctor ever change your due date or has it been October 7th from February 19 onward?
Hey, They just said that I was 7wks on Feb 19th  of my ultrasound and Due date they said was Oct 7th  
I see what you mean about the ultrasound conception date.Yea It was a little weird I just asked her when last ultrasound  date was then I asked on the calendar  when was my conception date and she first said the 14th and I was like oh man yeah cause before they told me it was the 15th. Then she changed her mind and said it was the 15th instead  
So, at that first ultrasound they said you were due October 7, and that has never been changed or adjusted?
She did say conception dates arent exactly accurate  and that it could be a day off that's where she got that from. It did scare me a little bit more I can't  lie lol
Or did you get your own due date from an online calculator? I'm looking for information about what they told you the first time you went in, meaning the first time they could see the baby on the screen, which sounds like it was February 19th. Not for information on what you figured out on your own, but what they actually said at that time to you. Sounds like they said you were at 7 weeks, and I think you're saying that on February 19, they told you that you were due October 7, from looking at the pictures in the ultrasound and not from a little cardboard wheel and the first day of your last period. Right?
Yes from the ultrasound on Feb 19th they said I was 7wks and then got conception date  from thier calendar
They told me the 15th then and when I talked to someone today she said conception was on the 14th then changed it back after I said that they gave me the 15th the first time
OK. Well, here's the way I see it.

For one thing, you should consider telling your boyfriend what happened. You've been stressed over this partly because you've been trying to keep it a secret, and you're afraid he'll be mad at you for what happened with Mr. Criminal. But the stress is affecting your relationship, not due to anything he has done, and also, getting a DNA test with him soon (if you can afford another prenatal DNA test) will help. You were in a bad position and did what you could to mitigate it, but frankly, it's going to seem worse to him if you keep it all a secret than if you tell him what has been going on. Of course, you know the guy more than I do, but I've been told by women who tried to keep their worries a secret that one thing they have been told later by their guy (if he found out) is that every day they didn't explain to him what was going on felt like another day of lying to them.

Second thought is, it really does sound like the baby is from your boyfriend and not the guy from Egypt. He wore a condom. You had a reliable lab test and he is not the dad according to that test. The baby is a boy. (If you don't know the Shettles method, look it up. It's not proven, but it is suggestive that if the baby came from the earlier sex it might have been a girl.) Your ultrasound was early enough to be reliable. You had sex with your boyfriend close to or on the day when you ovulated.

Third thought is, talk all of this over with your therapist.

Final thought is, if you are saying an abortion rides in the balance if you cannot be a thousand percent sure that the guy from Egypt is not the dad, well ... would that really be true? And adoption would be out of the picture? If you really would abort without more certainty, that is where you need to get a DNA test with your boyfriend. If you have always wanted a child with him, and since everything suggests this is his child, you should be entirely certain if the child is not, before considering any action so dire.
Oh, I guess I should also add to the list above (though I have said it already), get what information you can get about the guy who forced you to have sex. You know where he lived? You know who his friends are? You need to know his last name, when he is leaving the country, what the details are on his deportation, and so forth. This is so if in the future you want to report him or to add to someone else's rape suit against him, you have credible information.  
You are absolutely right and you've  really helped make my decision a little easier. I am going to trust the test and what you say does make sense. I really dont want to abort my baby esp If I'm not 100 % sure that is this guy from Egypt.  I wish I could test again.I really dont have money left for another one..  I have to be honest I am scared to death of telling my bf I really dont want to put doubt in his head and am so embarrassed.  I dont want him to have to think about what happened  to me either. I understand why you say that for sure though and I think I will try my best to put my worries  aside. I do know about the shuttles method. I kinda was thinking that too. I heard that boy sperm live longer than girls and that would mean I got pregnant with a boy instead. I'm not too sure if that's true that boys swim fast as and die slower but I've read both types of reviews on it. I'm praying to god with all my heart this turns out well for all of us here and will have to wait and see. Fingers crossed.. It is a scarey long 5 months but will definitely come back on here when I get to see my baby If the results are accurate or not... I really want  to help anyone out if I can.. My bf  is darker skinned and dark curly kinky hair. I'm white light skinned . The other guy is light tanned skinned and it looked to me even though his hair was very short no curls. I know sometimes it takes a few months for features to come in and skin color but either way I will keep you posted for sure. Thank you so much for taking the time to talk to me and help me. I'm praying My mom praying and a couple friends as well so I hope it turns out alright.. You've been really sweet and helpful.  
Well, you have part of the description of the Shettles method right, anyway. It says that male sperm swim faster and get to the egg faster but also have shorter life spans, not that they "live longer than girls." Shettles would support, if you ovulated on the 15th, your boyfriend being the dad since the baby is a boy. In the Shettles theory, female sperm get there slower, but are viable longer. Thus, if you had been pregnant with a girl, it might have suggested the guy four days earlier was the dad. The baby isn't a girl, meaning Shettles would suggest your boyfriend is the dad.
My mom was just wondering If you have some reviews  of girls that did come back recently after the test was acreddited  and they say perfected. If the results ended up being accurate  or not? I've just been trying to search recent reviews only on accuracy and I've found some but I more so found questions on it instead. If not It's  ok .. you've  been great either way
Thank you so much.. Have you heard of that working for a lot of people and have you heard a lot of people that boys swim faster and have shorter lives? Just curious  
It sounds from everything you've reported like your boyfriend is the dad. Whether you tell your boyfriend what happened and has been going on or not (and I do think he deserves you to have faith in him to handle it), try to remove from your vocabulary the idea that you have something to be "embarrassed" about. No matter what the conditions were, a woman has the right to be in proximity to a man without him forcing himself on her. Maybe looking back you can see things you should have considered and done differently, and probably your boyfriend will appreciate it if you say that. But nobody deserves to be raped. Don't take on blame for someone attacking you.
In answer to your question that just crossed with my last post, I don't know much about Shettles, just the theory and that some people say it works for them. It would be tricky because of needing to know when ovulation is coming, but possibly with modern ovulation test kits it is easier. You can find anecdotal comments on the Internet that people were successful using it to try to plan the genders of the kids, but of course, you can find all sorts of things on the Internet. lol
Oh Ok Thanks again and I you think I should also absolutely  believe the 15th not the 14th right? I think her saying that and me looking on diff websites where a couple said 14 just threw me off a little. Oh and I called a counselor  Idk if I told you or not and and are waiting for them to call me back. I'm looking forward to getting better, moving forward and  being able to put all this behind me soon :)
I think you should believe the preponderance of the evidence.  The condom use, timing, ultrasound, etc. and especially that you had a DNA test, all says it is your boyfriend's baby.
You are right  :) your a great person to talk to and I'm happy you reached out for sure.
Hey AnnBrook, I still have been coming on here to check the accuracy  of girls after birth tests I'd I can find them and I found this girl ZynishiaJeff saying her and a bunch of other girls test  was wrong and she also had a zero percent and had to go to court over it and the test afterword came back different  that the guy was the father. Now I'm kinda scared again. I was wondering if you have heard any legit false test returns? I was wondering if you had any girls on here that are accurate that I can read  their stories? I can only find a a few. Sorry to bother you again.
Please re-read everything I said above. You saw the guy do the swab and hand it in at the lab, it doesn't sound like a mistake was made in your testing, and he wore a condom. None of these throws your test result into question.

In the earlier days of prenatal DNA testing, interim labs knew little about doing collection for processing labs, controls weren't necessarily tight, and guys sometimes sent a ringer to take the test. These loopholes have all been closed by now. (Also, in Zyonisia's case, it sounded like the guy was very aggressively trying to dodge paternity, raising the question of whether he had fudged his test in the first place.)  Zyonisia's story isn't your story. Nobody else's story is your story, frankly.

Per your request for more stories, except for what you can do yourself with word search, MedHelp doesn't index its posts. But word search would be enough to find it if there were really "a bunch of other girls" with this story. If a DNA lab was making mistakes, we'd sure hear about it, and we just aren't.

I cannot do anything to keep you from freaking out about imagined negative futures. If you simply cannot live with the doubt, do a discreet test with Ravgen on the man that it seems (from your testing and from logic) must be the father. It might be worth the money even if you needed to take out a loan.

But I think that if you focus on your OWN story and your OWN evidence, you will come back to rationality about this. Others' tales aren't yours, and some are even lies or at least exaggerated. I would suggest that you put your time and emotional energy into dealing with the trauma of what you went through. The anxiety will die down as you assess what happened and what it means to you emotionally, and learn to move forward.

I see you are looking not just for the bad stories but for more good stories. And as I think I've already explained, most women only write in when they don't have an answer, and then we never hear from them again once they get an answer. Word search will find them if there are any, but there aren't many.

I just want you to remember, your worst-case scenario is not based on your actual, real medical evidence, more just on your fears, and your unwillingness to tell your boyfriend what happened to you also might be making you feel like your fears are more real. You might be putting yourself into a tight little cage where it feels like you have no out. I strongly suggest working with a counselor to release some of this.
Have an Answer?

You are reading content posted in the DNA / Paternity Community

Top Pregnancy Answerers
13167 tn?1327194124
Austin, TX
4769306 tn?1568490209
NC
Learn About Top Answerers
Didn't find the answer you were looking for?
Ask a question
Popular Resources
Get information and tips on how to help you choose the right place to deliver your baby.
Get the facts on how twins and multiples are formed and your chance of carrying more than one baby at a time.
Learn about the risks and benefits of circumcision.
What to expect during the first hours after delivery.
Learn about early screening and test options for your pregnancy.
Learn about testing and treatment for GBS bacterium.