how can you help me

[jj5225]

I live and (think) I love a chronic alcoholic and want to know why I can't find a way to fix it.
Except for the fact that I know from previous experience that if he detoxes he will seize and may be die.

[Rainbow_Ike]

JJ
There is now way o G*d's green earth that you can "get help" for your alcoholic. It is a truism that there is only one person in the world who we can change, OURSELVES. What you CAN change is your attitudes.

RUN, do not walk, to the neartest al-anon meeting Since they are all slighty different, If you donot get what you need fro thst meting, go to another one and another one, until you find ione where you "click" with the members..

Ask for a "Temporary Sponsor.".,.an oldermember wirth more experience who will help you adjust to Al-anon.

Don't bother with why it;s called that name. Get a meeting list and some pamphlets.

AND GO TO A MEETING AS OFTEN AS YOU CAN- 90 MEETINGS IN 90 DAYS IS SUGGESTED FOR NEW MEMBERS,.. This is to change old habits and old ways of thinking, and to get u you used to a new way of seeing the world. Not as a vitctim of a drunkard, but as a a PARTNER wishing to help.

How am I so "smart:"? Ignore my Master; Degree in social work. I've been sober in AA since leap day 1984, and ended up joining Al-anon the next year due to the number of active alcoholics still inn my life...

So try it. it's free, and all of your misery will be refunded in full if it's not for you!

Good luck, and let m know how it works out

Ike

[4Maddie44]

There is a forum on here for alcholism, and that may be a better place to find help.

[paying_it_forward]

Hey :) though i don't know all of your circumstances in my opinion the only way he can get past his alcoholism is to choose to...sure it will be a lengthy process but he should get professional help and councelling. My father (and pretty sure my mother) is an alcoholic he also has tourettes which was a scary thing in my younger years, now that im older im encouraging him to seek help get off the drink and also get some help for what i think is depression.

He has to want to quit...and with your support and medical support it IS possible.

Very best of luck to you...

[RavenT]

No one can fix an Alcoholic... My question to you is...

What are you getting from the relationship???

An alcoholic must be willing to fix him or herself... it is not a case of fixing but a case seeking treatment and part of that treatment is getting themselves into a place for detox, especially if there may be a medical need. depending on where you live there are some states that offer forced commitment from substance treatment. If that is the case, you have a choice. Others states require that a substance abuser go for treatment voluntarily.  

I would also suggest that you seek treatment yourself ... there are groups for partners of alcoholics and family members... Look under AA or Al-anon...

I suggest ou do some thinking and get some support.