I don't get myself sometimes

[AJRC323]

I feel like **** tonight, so what do I do? Come on here and read other people's stories of depression and try to offer advice if I can. Why? I don't even know why!

What I'm trying to say is, I would usually avoid reading about other people's depression because that might make me feel bad for them which then leads to me feeling worse. However, I got to offer advice to a few people tonight, so that might be keeping me from feeling worse.

Ah! How about you all tell me how giving advice to others makes you feel when you're feeling bad before hand. Does it help you feel better because you're helping someone? Or do their stories get to you and make you feel worse? I'm curious to see any replies to that.

[Bubulous]

I am bi-polar 1 which they say is the worst.  I have learned to not explain myself to those who aren't receptive to it.  Some people enjoy my mania and understand when I am so deppressed I won't answer the phone.  I guess if I try to look at it really positively, most of my family have a mental disorder of some sort.  I couldn't imagine trying to hanging around normal people.  That is why I don't have many friends...lol

The point is if this forum is all you have you still have a lot.  If you don't get feed back immediately it is unfortunate but someone will usually be around to help.

[AJRC323]

Hmm, coming back to this topic after seeing my psychologist today, we talked about how my family deals with seeing me depressed. I realized that my parents aren't supporting me. I know they love me and want me to get better, and they hate seeing me in pain, but they just throw their hands up in the air and say "we don't know what to do" if I try to just talk to them for a few minutes. It's even gotten to the point where my dad will yell at me if I'm up all night. Yes, my depression and anxiety do keep me awake at night sometimes.

Anyway, my psychologist thinks I'm not getting the support I need from my family, and the problem with that is, they're pretty much all I have. I guess what I'm trying to say is, I get the opposite reactions from people here. They all seem to care and are gentle in trying to help, which is what I think we all need.

[lilymoon]

It helps me not focus on myself and makes me feel good if I can help.

[patient49]

Hey, it's an interesting topic. i have done the same thing, nd I still do. i have the inclination to help othere, on here, especially when I am not feeling well. But I don't pity anyone because I believe life is fair and that anyone can get better!

But I am responding to your message here because just recently I have been realizing that it's not so much helping others and having that make us feel good, but maybe what we are really looking for is someone we can relate to, and helping each other mutually. That is something i just realized yesterday, and so you can reach out to someone and help them, but it should be a mutual feeling of love and understanding/support.

This way you help each other and it's not one sided. And you can both admit your fears and worry, and understand each other and offer support. And actually, I think that we, personally, can embrace our sorrow and become beautiful, and realize that once we do this we can reciprocate it with others, or someone else who can relate. And this I think can be easy to do if we realize that there are so many people out there who are hurt. So if we can embrace our loss and sorrow, and allow it to make us beautiful and peaceful, and know that if we are doing everything we can to be humble and a good person, then our suffering can make us beautiful. I believe, and Thich Nhat Hanh ( a spiritual leader) believes that suffering makes us beautiful/attractive/able to love. K, just thought I'd say this and hope it helps. Kinda hard to explain.

Ash :)

[Bubulous]

I do enjoy getting on here and trying to help others.  It makes me feel better.  Unfortunatley I can get caught up in wanting to stay on here all the time and forget to fight my own deppression.  I am bipolar and sometimes it sneaks up on me with little warning.

The thing is when I am manic I can usually offer good spirit filled advice.  But if I forget to take leisure time and meditation time I can easily become unstable.  I rode my bike to the gym today and swam around for a while.  This was after I had a dream of one of my friends I am trying to help.  He got upset with someone and slammed his head into a wall.  In my dream I began feeling dizzy and fell against a wall sliding dwon all the way to the floor.

When I got back up I ran into a gymnasium and started skiing on the floor in my socks.  I then woke up and my head was hurting so I figured it was trying to tell me to get off my butt and go work out.  

I guess in some sense they call it second hand deppression.  When I read some of the stories on here, especially because I am bipolar and manic alot of the time, I can't help but try to give encouraging words.  I feel your pain but on the days we feel good I think we have a spiritual obligation to help others and on the days we need healing ourselves we should take advantage of it so we can come back and help others...yoga/meditation is the best thing for me to do to get back centerd.