Major Depressive Disorder

[12gauge]

Hello all.

My wife suffers from Major Depressive Disorder.  This has been an ongoing battle for her.  I've recently come to realize how tragic this can truly be.  It has affected all areas of her life.  Our relationship has suffered terribly.  We talk, but even that is limited.  I'm trying to separate myself from my own emotion, in order to clearly see.  I want to help her, but my efforts are often perceived as overwhelming.  Let's not concentrate on that last statement - just an FYI.  However, what I would like to ask is, "What can I do to help?"  

[Bob_D]

The STAR*D study of showed that the most effective treatment is a combination of talk therapy and medication, so I would encourage her to try both avenues. Some therapists are better than others. Regular moderate exercise that is enjoyable is also widely touted as being effective.

You can tactfully see that she adheres to her therapeutic regimen and of course. provide a sympathetic ear.

It was also helpful to me to read about others who went through MDD - "The Noonday Demon" by Andrew Solomon was instructive and entertaining and probably contains far more advice than I can remember here.

[LeftCoastChick]

Is your wife on any meds? With MD, it important that she finds one to balance out the chemicals in her brain. Think of it like Epilepsy, seizures are caused by a chemical imbalance or a defect in a certain are of the brain, which actually is the area that depression come from.  I hope that you can get her into a pscyhiatrist, find coping mechanisms, get her balanced neurologically, support groups work very well ontop of other treatments. None of these are instant cures, meds can help a paitent be able to deal with issues once a person has some lifting of depression.

We cannot advocate at MH, any unscientifically proven methods, no can we diagnose in any way. Send you on the right direction, that's what we are here for. But go to your doctor, and get a referral, but don't relly on any  book as sole treatment. Like Bob said, with therapy, meds, a regular routine will help tremendously on her path to wellness.
You might want to consider doing a bit of therapy yourself, to learn some coping mechanism and how it's affected you,
I wish you the best of luck,
LeftCoastChick
Depression Community Leader

[12gauge]

Meds?  Yes, an anti-depressant and Xannax.  We talked yesterday and she feels as though the meds are not helping.  She's been on them both for about 3 years.  I know that's a long time for Xannax.  She plans to talk with her MD about a possible change in medication.  

Therapy is an old hat for me.  When this first started, life was intense in all respects.  And it hit me hard.  I ended up "disappearing" for about 2 years, due to being overmedicated.  I'm a bit wary of shrinks now.  I've come to a certain level of understanding and appreciation.  I'm no longer on medication and have no desire to be.  I'm doing much better now, than probably ever.  

I'm reaching out in as many ways I can think possible.  I'm here...  I'm currently talking with a local therapist (granted - only via email at this point.)  I've ordered the book Bob has suggested.  I've been reading as much as I can about depression online.  I'm hoping to gain insight as to how to present the idea of therapy to her in a positive way, and hope to have the idea received by her.  

Can anyone help me in that regard?  How can I present the idea of therapy to her, in an unobtrusive way?  I cannot spoil this.  I do not want this effort to backfire.  I have presented the idea a few times in the past few months, trying to be as unobtrusive as possible.  And, I hope I have not already spoiled the thought.  Her response is that she will not consider it.  She goes on to say that she, "does not need it."