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Avatar universal

So um... Help.

So um... I'm depressed. Not officially. But I've done enough research to know for myself. The fact that I'm not sure kills me. So to summarize- I'm an intelligent, independent fifteen year old. A freshy in highschool. I have this really large group of close knit friends which is lovely yeah, but people come and go and are so easily forgotten. I guess for me it will be a touch different as I could be what one would call a "core" member of the group, as in I was one of the original few, there since the beginning. Physically I prefer the sidelines. I live in Illinois and am moving to Vermont in two months. Ive known I'm moving for two years. It was postponed because we didn't have time to buy a house and ****. I also have severe detachment issues. I can't live without my friends. It's not simply something I can get therapy for. Or something I'll get over. I won't just make new friends. I can't. I simply can't. I'd sooner die then leave them. I can't bear the idea that on July 31st Im just going to never see them. Any of them. School just ended and I had to say goodbye to a few already. Its too soon. I cant be saying goodbye. I know im going to kill myself. I cant live without them. Not that it matters because if anything itll just speed up the painful process of them all forgetting i exist.  

Moving on. I went to therapy for a while but since my passionate need to know was rather overpowering my therapist recommende me to a psychiatrist who told me i was suffering from a "stressful lifestyle". Which was utter ********. Somethings wrong. Something is so wrong inside my head. Everyone tells me that the proffessional know best but if someone is THAT far off from what i feel then i dont see how that makes even the slightest bit of sense. So i was wondering if anyone out there was willing to recommend any solid methods to explain why i believe i should get a second opinion or a brain scan, something to prove anything. Or if they know of a good place or anyway i can get help. Please.
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480448 tn?1426948538
Sweetie, you need to seek help, and urgently.  Suicide is just NEVER the answer.  

I believe everything you're saying about how you feel, who wouldn't feel like that moving to a new place?  My goodness!  What I will tell you is that you WILL adapt, and you WILL meet new friends.  It SEEMS impossible, but it's not.  People do it every single day.  You may absolutely LOVE your new town and your new friends, and what's cool about it is you can be anything you want...you get a fresh clean new slate.   If you have always wanted to be in a certain clique, but maybe didn't feel like you'd fit in...you have the opportunity to hang out with any kind of person you want where you're going.

SURE it will be hard.  You will feel sad, you will feel anxious..but I PROMISE you you will get through it.  You need to tell your parent(s) what's going on...they would want to know so they can help you.  I have a daughter your age and would be devastated to know she struggled and didn't come to me.  

Everything at your age seems SO big and impossible.  Sweetie, PLEASE trust an old lady when I say we've all been 15 and we all have gotten through times we never thought we would, including moving away from our friends...and back in the day, we didn't have facebook, and twitter to keep in touch with anyone we wanted anywhere in the world.  You can still be in touch with your friends every day, and if you decide in a few years, when you're an adult that you want to move back to your home town, you can DO that!  But, you have to give this new town a chance.  You'd be surprised at how quickly you will meet new people and start new friendships.  You obviously have a lot to offer people, as you have a lot of friends now...the people where you are going will feel the same way!  You have to try...and lean on your family for support while you're adapting.  You can bet that your parents are sad and anxious about the move too.  NO ONE likes to pick up and start anew, in a strange place.   Support each other.

PLEASE seek help immediately if you think you're going to harm yourself, it's NOT the answer hon..and your family will NEVER recover,.  Imagine your friends, who you claim to love SO much you cannot live without them...imagine how devastated they would be if you died!  OMG, I couldn't imagine.  You cannot do that to your loved ones.  It isn't fair...and there's nothing in life that's EVER that bad...think of the people who lose a child to cancer, or who become paralyzed, or are the victim of a terrible violent crime...even those people find a way to go one and live.  Certainly this is no reason (and nothing ever is) to take your own life.  

You must ask your parents to help you find professionals that can help you.  Promise?  We're here for you too hon.  You can talk to us anytime.  We also have a teen depression forum that may help you also:

http://www.medhelp.org/forums/Teen-Depression/show/185

You will be fine!!!
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Avatar universal
P.S.  A hospital in Fort Worth, Texas is not going to be helpful for you living in Illinois.  But go back to another psychiatrist or the same psychiatrist and tell them about you wanting to kill yourself. Then you will get the help that you need.
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Avatar universal
There is no way to prove depression, except by your symptoms which you can find online.  It sounds like you've researched it some yourself.  No brain scan will give you answers.  If you are really serious about going to kill yourself, then you are clinically depressed and need antidepressant medication.  If you are as honest with the psychiatrist as you were in your posting, then I think that the doctor would give you the medication.  It's a very extreme reaction that warrants medical attention.  Please be honest with the doctor before you do anything to yourself.  It's going to be a major loss for you, but you should call all your friends and tell them about your new life there.  But there will be other even bigger major losses in your life, and the answer is not to kill yourself.  That's the sign of someone who has some significant mental problems as you have identified in yourself.  Get help NOW.
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Avatar universal
whoops I forgot it is John Peter Smith Hospital.  mandy876
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Avatar universal
it is called Peter Smith  it is in fort worth texas.  do you live locally.  I hope they will be able to help you.  we all have our problems.  at medhelp we try our best to help each other.  mandy876
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Avatar universal
Thankyou so much, but yiu didnt mention the name of the hospital?
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Avatar universal
we have a county hospital here they will issue a insurabce policy with them,  some of our top doctors work there.  some times it is a long wait.  I have been lucky to have a good insurance.  my nieces all have joined up 2 have been accepted. they can give you an mri and all sorts of tests to find out what is going on.dont take one doctors opinion  go to another.  you have a lot to live for.  don't let your past alter your future.  there is a bunch of good things to look forward to.  believe those feelings will pass you are changing into a grown up.  you call your friends and see how they feel.  don't do anything stupid.  life is short you have kids to come and then a grandmother.  you have so much wonderful things coming into yoir life. it does get better.  do talk to your doctor.  check out the county hospital.  they turn no oneaway. I am in severe depression brought on by my moms death.  I did not want to go on.  pills help a lot.  but I still miss my family mandy876
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