Suicidal Confession part lll : its taking a toll

[lynnsee]

background info: off and on with my bf for about 5yrs. he just recently confessed that he thinks about suicide often. I told his mother about it. dont think she even did anything. I told her again but still dont thunk she said much to him. he still talks about it almost everyday. this morning he even said he just doesn't wanna be "here" anymore.

I myself have been diagnosed with mdd but I also have panic disorder which I think just brought on the depression. I wasn't aware that my bf had it since before we even met but its really bad. he talks about killing himself often. I've tried talking to his mom. but nothing was done. he refuses to get help. im starting to get overwhelmed because if we fight he beings it up. like makes our arguement more of a reason to take his own life. I really do wanna be with him but im afraid to screw up in any little way. we've been known to vet into it pretty badly.  it hasn't been as bad as its gotten before but bad enough to make him not wanna live anymore. I just feel like I cant help him, I have to watch everything I say and do and even his own mom doesn't help him. he sent me a message basically saying that he was.going to get it done one day. I showed his mom and she said shed check in him but nothing happened. she even texted me saying that he was ok when really he had also been texting me saying he was still gonna do it. I just feel ao helpless for him. I think its even starting to trigger my anxiety. today I just feel heavy and like so uncomfortable.  I just cant pinpoint why. I just want him to want to get better. but he doesn't. I asked him if we can go see someone together since he won't get himself help. he said no. but then said he'd go with. e to talk to someone as long as its just about me. idk what to do. im starting to lose it. I want my life and future with this guy but im scared that one day I might get a call or God for id I be the one to find the man I live dead because he IA just so unhappy. idk how I could live on without him. idk how I can continue to have him in my life knowing that he doesn't even wanna be in his own life. I feel like if he goes, I go. but I know that wont make anything.g better. I just need help. like I really really do.



p.s please excuse my typeos. my internet and keyboard are really cooperating

[lynnsee]

thank you for all your support and advice. its sad to say that its none of my concern anymore. but thank you so much again. you're very much appreciated.

[4Maddie44]

Of course you worry about your boyfriend.  I hope he appreciates you.  I think if his mother is doing nothing, she may think they are just empty gestures, and idle threats.  Perhaps he has been like this with her, and she could not get him to go to a doctor.  She would certainly do something if she thought he really was suicidal.  A mother would not sit back if her child was crying out for help.  Perhaps he just wants attention, and likes to worry people.  He must know he is hurting you.

There is nothing more you yourself can do, until he admits he needs professional help.  If he is really suicidal then he would seek help, not just keep talking about it.  I can understand that you are frightened he really will do something drastic.  You are doing all you can for him.  Please don't let him upset you even more.  Your health is important.  

[lynnsee]

I am starting feel like its getting to me. I can't help but worry about him all the time. we're not doing g so well at the moment. I always worry if i should hold back or not because of how upset he gets. like am I just supposed to tip toe around his feelings and just suck up my own. IDL. I think his mom has heard it all before but I still think she solhould at least talk to him. I just feel so lost or something. I dont even know.  

[4Maddie44]

Hello I am listening.  I did reply to your previous post.

It seems that his mother does not think he means what he says, or surely she would have spoken to him.  You are taking such a lot on your young shoulders.  Do you believe his threats are real?  You said before he does not want to be properly diagnosed because he wants to join the military.  Now he is saying he does not want to live.  What does he really want?  

If he refuses to get help, and you or his mum cannot persuade him too, then what is to be done?  Why won't he see a doctor?  If he is really feeling life is not worth living, then he must get professional help.  He is not trying to help himself - why not?  You have done all you can.  You are making yourself ill too.

Do you think you can get him the help he needs?  I cannot understand why he thinks there is no need to get help from a doctor.  Surely he cannot go on like this, threatening to take his own life, and worrying you so much.  Why has his mother not done anything to help?  Do you think she has heard it all before, or just she does not want him to see a doctor?  He is old enough to get help for himself.  Perhaps you should step back and let him decide for himself what to do.  If he was really really ill he would certainly want help.

Don't make yourself ill worrying so much about him.  You are important too.

[lynnsee]

anyone?