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depression

hi. i am 23 and unemployed since a long time. due to this and many other problems i face a lot of physical abuse at home. i cry continuously for hours & pee in my pants when i'm being beaten. i have also cut my self several times & tried suicide. i had to seek medical help but i was beaten for that too. how i do i overcome these crying spells & come out of depression. nothing at my house will change, everyone will continue to beat me.
either help me or give me a suicide advice which works well, without any fail. i cant live anymore. please pleease. dpnt consider it as fake, im in a lot of problme all by myself, no one to support
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Avatar universal
Do you have any friends who would allow you to live with them while searching for a job?  You NEED to get out of that house.  Your family is horrible to you from the sound of it and not being loving to you at all.  Abuse is NOT something you should ever tolerate; it's a shame this was not reported when you were a minor.  Report the next incident to the police and ask them if they know of anywhere you can seek help, whether a battered women's shelter or what. You NEED out of that for your own health, both physical and mental (and mental health is indeed physical in nature).  Then, once you're out of the situation, find a way to seek medical help.

I also suggest doing some journaling and soul searching in this time.  Prepare (and/or update) your resume while working to get out of this situation to show anyone who's a friend and might take you in that you are planning to do your part to help, not just mooch off them.

Good luck and keep us updated!
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
if I do so they will probably kill me.well that will be better than this atleast.
I dont come from a country where you are open in thoughts, in our country parents abuse you. and u cannot do anything about it, except crying.
my whole family knows what I'm going through aunts, uncles & cousins. but nobody can do anything about it.
I need advice to be strong.
I have applied everywhere but I haven't got a call.
my parents always keep saying that we have invested so much in you & your not worth a penny. if I report to the police,  I'l be thrown out and I have nobody to support me.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I'm so sorry you're going through this. I live in the states and things are very different from India.
I hope you get a call soon. If you get a job can you get a place of your own?
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
yes if I get a call. I will move from here.
but I'm afraid I might kill myself before that.
I am getting suicidal thoughts every second. since morning I have made numerous cuts on my body. The pain through cuts has eased my sorrows. but I need a permanent solution.
I really need help. Please do u have anything. any medical advice. something please
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
You may feel no laughter or happiness inside because these positive emotions have been blocked by unhappy memories. Old emotional hurts inevitably lurk inside and when the new feelings try to bubble up they are filtered through a preexisting feeling of hopelessness, fear or anxiety. "Hurt" is stored because the body retains a primitive subconscious ability to remember every incident that it experiences.

Three skills must be learnt to overcome this,

Firstly, a method of releasing or handling the subconscious "hurt memories" which have been stored.
Secondly, developing self-confidence to deal with the actual situation which triggers the anxiety.
Thirdly, developing new responses to express the emotions that are felt when the situation recurs.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
thank u for your advice.  but how do I implement them.
can u please give some tips as to how I develop new responses to those feelings & thoughts.
how do I handle those subconscious memories. I don't have any partner to share anything or any talks or friends that aren't too close.
and self confidence is something I've lacked since minor.
Helpful - 0
6726276 tn?1421126668
Dear Iam in Command. What is it that your parents want of you?
    Do they wish you to be employed?
    Killing yourself is no solution. No one knows for sure what happens after death.
   Are there any Religious books you can read? How about a fiction book to take your mind off your present ?
    There are other people on MedHelp from India that may better understand how to help you out of your current situation.  
    Please stop hurting yourself. If you believe, pray for solution. Things will get better. There are others in the world that may be able to help.
   I will pray for you. Stay alive. We need you on the planet. Ok? Pamela
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Make calls to the places you've already applied at. You never know, they could have an opening that very day. Calling them also shows you really want the job. Once you get a job and get out of that house I think you will feel so much better.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
dear remar: I have called them, they say they will soon come up with opening but its been two years now.
yes once I get out I will surely feel better but I want the solution for now.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
dear CRSEASIDE, I don't know what they want.
I never made friends becaus of them, when I had they said friends are not good u should leave them. so i left my friends.
now they say ur anti social u dont have any friends.
they told to never have any boyfriend & I didn't,  now they say u don't have a boyfriend, because ur anti-social. had u had someone we could have married you.
they always oppose their statements.
whatever happens after death is better than what I am living.
its good to see that people who don't even know my name are concerned more than people who gave me birth
Helpful - 0
6726276 tn?1421126668
Yes dear girl, the world of love is bigger than the world of hate.
     We want you to get over this & live life. Make a new friend. You know how, you've made friends with us. Then new doors will open. Pamela
Helpful - 0
6996659 tn?1386862842
You need to go to a shelter, a new begining, suicide is not a option! I mean it too, get your self to a womens shelter, Hey I'm a lot older than you and am also extremly depressed most the time, I enrolled in community college for Jan 6 Fall starts. Go to Gov education FSAFA, and apply, you will get a nice chunck of cash and then you can live on you own. I get about 6 grand each semester. Take some interesting classes where you can get a degree and help someone else. I don't know what you believe but, , it's God's job not yours to take your life. It might not seem like it now but he may have something wonderful for your life. It is unfortunate that we live in a fallen evil world, but its evil people not God. But to have God in your life, free will says you must ask him in, then things will be in his hands. Thats why Christ died for us to unite us Back  with God when we are finally so beat up by people and life this is where we turn, if you kill yourself guess who will be waiting..you think this are bad now? Go to your community college and get somethings done. Dont tell anyone!
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
thank u evryone for your support. and advice.
I bought a book today on the advice of CRSeaside.
I feel better now but. and I will try my best to follow your tips. thank u so much everyone.
I really appreciate the help and guidance. and of course the advice.
I have also enrolled in a library. whenever I will feel sad or depressed I will go there. thank u so much.
Helpful - 0
6726276 tn?1421126668
Dear Sweet Girl, the name you selected for the MedHelp forum says it all.
  I am in control. Thank you for posting back so we can keep track of your progress.  Remember all the way accross the ocean to you, we send our love to you. Please get better & keep posting. Pamela
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
yes I will. thank u so much
all that love is really needed.
will keep you posted.
thanks alot. god bless.
:)

& thank u all
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
hi all. I had applied to a firm in December and they held a written test. but I couldn't make it. I couldn't clear the test. now I don't know what to do. that was the best chance i could get. and now I am hopeless n in despair. n jobless too.
Helpful - 0
6726276 tn?1421126668
Dear girl. That's ok. You had no opportunities,then you had one, now you'll have another. Stay healthy. Make more inquiries. Keep up your reading & going to the library. Feel free to send me a note.  Make a new question on MedHelp so we can start a new post to you. Love you honey. Pamela
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Sending hope your way.  I hear your pain and need for safety and security. I'm glad you are able to share at least here.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
hi Pamela. I understand this. and I am trying to improve my brains too. I'm a dull personality.
and what new post should I make.  I have nothing new to talk about.
and I haven't told my family about results due to fear. I am feeling so guilty about it and bad too
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
hi all. I am still waiting for a job & my health remains the same. I still face depression and its tough dealing with it.
atleast I am better than before.  I thought I'd share it with u guys, because u were my strongest support  while fighting against my own family.
thank u all once again
Helpful - 0
1110049 tn?1409402144
Hello, and glad to see you are still in touch with us here.  You sound a very strong person as you are coping with your depression well.

Remember we are all here for you, to support you as best we can.  Thank you for sharing with us, we do like to hear how people are getting on.  It is very difficult coping with depression alone.  I have not "spoken" to you before, but I see from above you have had great support from lovely people.  Everyone here is so kind and understanding.  

I do hope you find a job soon.  Glad you are being more positive about things.

Big hug, and take care
Helpful - 0
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