severe ptsd

[sonia_ji]

i am an old user to this forum .... i joined almost 16 years ago. you can check my previous post....my parents died in front of me and now my brother also left this world in front of my eyes..... i used to commit suicide in the past when i was in my teens and early twenties.... i am 33 years old now ...... i never though that my brother will also left this world due to sudden cardiac arrest...... its been almost a year my brother left us..... i am now having severe pani attacks .... sleepless nights.... went to cardiologist my ecg was abnormal inverted t wave was there... troponin was fine then echo test and holter test came normal..... but the cardiologist suggested for one more test... thallium mibi stress scan..... i was not able to pass the stress test ... they injected adenosine and i got fast heart rate and pani attack they had to stop the test.... then the doctor said we will use treadmill for stress ( it will be done after some days) i was ashamed that i couldn't pass the stress test i was embarrassed..............cardiologist has said that you need to see a psychologist asap...... i have sleepless nights always thinking about my brother......i am thinking of jumping from my flat i.e on 5th floor........ please tell me i dont know how willl i talk to a psychologist ..........