Avatar universal

Sleeping in my moms bed, is this bad?

I'm 16 years old, and a junior in high school. My parents got divorced when I was a freshman. About 14 years old. My dad got kicked out, and my mom, my younger brother and I, were living by ourselves. We both started sleeping in her bed. I had always been scared of the dark. But had been sleeping in my room with ease for months. For almost a year I slept on the couch watching tv until I fell asleep because I was so scared. But that was long before the divorce. Anyway, we moved to my aunts house for the winter, and I started sleeping alone again. But then I started sleeping in my moms bed again. My brother was too. But there was a fewonths he slept alone though. But now were both sleeping with her again. I've read before that kids of divorced parents sometimes sleep in their parents beds afterward. Is this going to screw me up once I'm older? I feel like an idiot. I just can't sleep in my own bed. I really just don't understand why.
6 Responses
134578 tn?1614729226
Anxiety can do funny things.  I once read that when Julia Roberts first went to New York, she stayed at one of her siblings' apartment when her sibling was gone, and she stayed up all night every night and slept in the day, she was so scared.  

You've been through a lot of stress, even just changing locations is stressful, and then the problems between your parents, and then just being a teenager.  It would be good to see a counselor to talk over all the life stress, and after a while it might ease enough to let you feel more normal about sleeping in your own bed.  Don't be too hard on yourself in the meantime.

One thing I suggest is getting a lot of exercise.  It's great for reducing stress, and enhances sleep, and gives you a lot of endorphins that help everything.
1958787 tn?1325376291
Its a normal thing. I slept with my mom till i was 16 1/2. And still do if i visit her house. Im 23 years old now.So dont sweat the small stuff hun
2217782 tn?1394363972
Hey, don't feel like an idiot, these things happen.

Divorce is a stressful thing, my parents have been split up for as long as I can remember and it can leave you with a lot of unresolved issues.
It's pretty normal for you to want to sleep with your mum or mom, escpecially after what happened, it's a comfort and probably a coping mechanism. You could have developed a lot worse coping mechanisms than wanting to sleep in the same bed as your mom, when you think about it it makes sense. Because, well...through the day we have a lot to occupy our minds and push all those little worries out of the way, but night time, well thats when all those little nasty thought come to the fore and create a lot of worry. It's like having a bad nightmare, it's always nice to know you've got someone there to cuddle you back to sleep.

I wouldnt worry to much! But if it's really bothering you talk to it about your mom and I'm sure you two could arrange something, cut it down to so many nights a week, or she could check in on you every hour or so.

One thing though: There's very little mention of your dad in here, it's important you maintain a relationship with him too!

Hope things work out!
Avatar universal
Will agree with swabes.  

All the best.  
1894410 tn?1364190055
I am a mother of 3 grown up boys and my youngest boy was very very scared of the dark and he slept with me a lot, because he felt safe and that is the main thing. He did it because he felt safe, and that is nothing bad nothing weird, he still has a night light and he is still scared of the dark and he is 18 years old and has a very happy life.
Please do not think this strange or weird, it is a wonderful thing that your mother loves you enough to make you feel safe and she will continue to do this throughout your whole life. What a blessing to have a mother like that and secretly every teenager has times when they all crawl into bed with mum or dad to feel safe. My daughter is 23 and still does regularly and of course my son, some nights my bed is very full and that is wonderful.....
Enjoy your life and your mum.
Avatar universal
I sleep in my mums bed and I'm 15, its purely because my mum and dad don't get on so I sleep in my mums bed and he has mine. I am fine sleeping alone and I don't see anything wrong with it! Don't stress on the little thing! If your embarrased just sleep in your own room sometimes?:*
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