Aa
A
A
A
Close
Divorce & Breakups Community
1.49k Members
Avatar universal

gf left because of depression

so for the past year or so my now ex gf had been struggling with depression and was very insecure with herself and her body. It was tough on us because there wasnt a lot of affection or intimacy anymore due to these reasons. she was no longer comfortable with me seeing her body or showing affection. Finally she left me last week because she said it wasnt fair for me and that it hurt her knowing that I have to "suffer" with her. she said it sucks because she still loves me, but that she needs to fix this and love herself before she can commit to the relationship. we have been together 4 years, and in this case I do believe her, I dont think there is anyone else, or that she used it as an excuse. this has been an issue and if that was the case shed have left a year ago. my question is wondering whether or not I should break the "no contact rule" and ask how she is doing. I do want to see us together again. I dont want to ruin my chances however. I just want her to know im still here for her without seeming like im begging for her or annoying her. the only contact we have is a snapstreak weve kept going.
1 Responses
Avatar universal
This is tricky because every situation is different. However, I do feel like maybe giving her sometime before breaking the "no contact rule" would be best. Your GF sounds like she needs to find herself, and is workign through some stuff. If you believe her, then you need to give her a bit of space to do just that. I would say wait a couple of weeks, and then maybe break the "no contact rule". However, when you do. Try to keep her feelings in mind. State Just wanted to check in, and see how you were. I understand if you dont feel the timing is right and dont respond. This will allow her to respond when she is ready. You are a good man for caring and being understanding to what she is going through.

I would also say when contact does begin agian take it slow. Get to know her all over again and let her be the guide for how to proceed. I know it is hard but you are doing the right thing by respecting her boundaries.
Have an Answer?
Top Relationships Answerers
Learn About Top Answerers
Didn't find the answer you were looking for?
Ask a question
Popular Resources
How do you keep things safer between the sheets? We explore your options.
Can HIV be transmitted through this sexual activity? Dr. Jose Gonzalez-Garcia answers this commonly-asked question.
For people with Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD), the COVID-19 pandemic can be particularly challenging.
A list of national and international resources and hotlines to help connect you to needed health and medical services.
Here’s how your baby’s growing in your body each week.
These common ADD/ADHD myths could already be hurting your child