I think my dog is dying. :(

[April2]

I think Willow is near the end. The last couple of weeks he stopped eating breakfast and only wanted his dinner. At first we were ok with that since he's always been a bit overweight and figured one meal a day is ok. I gave him a hair cut last Friday and grew a little more concerned when I noticed he had lost weight. This week, he refused his dry food so we tried coaxing him with wet food, thinking it may be his teeth, although I got his teeth cleaned just last Summer, I knew he's getting old. Today, he threw up and had diarrhea three times now and it looks like it's tinged with blood. He's not moving around much and doesn't want to eat or drink. I knew this day would come since he was diagnosed with Cushings years ago but I'm not ready for this. I feel so bad for him. I don't want him to suffer. How do you know if a dog is suffering? How? He's not crying or whimpering but he's not following me around the house anymore like he used to. He's always been my dog, a real baby, never leaving me. I'm not ready for this. I don't know if I should just make him comfortable as best as I can or go ahead and take him to the vet today. I know if I take him, he's not coming back. I'm already crying. I don't want to deal with this. I'm not ready! But I don't want him to suffer. Should I just let him go naturally or take him to the vet? I don't know what to do. He went downhill so fast, I wasn't ready for this. God, I hate this. Tomorrow's my daughter's and my birthday. I don't care about me but I don't want to do this on her birthday. I just don't know what to do! I knew this day would come but I didn't think it would come so fast. I just don't want him to suffer. How do I know if he's suffering? Is there a way to just make him comfortable and help him? Or should I just go ahead and take him to the vet? I don't know what's best! I want him to be at home with his family. He always gets upset going to the vet and gets nervous. God, I hate this! What's the best thing to do here? I need friends and support, please, not judging. I'm already a stressed out nervous wreck. I love my dog. I don't want this to happen!
Please pray I can make the best decision here. I need to make it soon.

[April2]

Thank you so much, mlb1234.
I just made a journal about whether pets go to heaven. I did that because someone asked me so I looked it all up. In doing so, I myself was so blessed and comforted because there's tons of scriptures to support this!

I also was recommended two books. The first one is: "Cold Noses At The Pearly Gates" by Gary Kurtz
And the second one was: "There Is Eternal Life For Animals" by Niki Behrikis Shanahan. I'm going to try to get both book. Maybe it will help someone else here too.

[mlb1234]

I have not followed your stories but I came across this post and just want to say I am so sorry for the loss of both your pets.  It is so hard to lose a pet who is your best friend, your child, and your loyal constant companion all in one being.  Many hugs.
Lisa

[April2]

I thought about doing it at home but he just went downhill so fast I didn't have time to think. He didn't act nervous though. He laid quietly in the car and in my arms at the vet. I knew he must have been awfully sick because he just didn't care. Thank you for writing.

[Dakotawinks]

What I would do, is have a vet come to your house where he is not so scared. Put him on a blanket so he can carry him to the car and ask for his ashes. That's what I have done. It does cost, but I felt it was worth it.
Remember: To live in the hearts we leave behind, is not to die:(

[April2]

Hi SassyLassie, I'm doing better today, I think. Probably mainly because I've been staying busy. How are you doing? Thanks for the prayers. I'm praying for you too.

[SassyLassie]

How are feeling today, April? I hope some better. This morning was hard on me, but, I thought it would be. Thanks for your comment on my picture of her, it made me cry, but, that is OK, just seeing a dog commercial brings the tears.
You are in my prayers.

[SassyLassie]

All this seemed to really hit me the last few hours, and I feel like someone has hit me real hard in the tummy. I was pretty good this morning, then after I got home, the reality hit me.
I did not want her to suffer either, and if I had not done this, it would not have been fair. Thanks for being there for me, maybe when I am more collected, I will be able to write more.
God bless are wonderful doggies.

[April2]

Oh SassieLassie, I'm so sorry! You do know how it feels. I totally understand not being able to write much. This is the first time I've posted since last night. I just wanted to tell you I'm sorry you lost your dog, too, and you can pm me anytime you want to talk and maybe we can help each other. I think we both understand exactly how if feels being so fresh. I'm trying to remember, though, that I didn't want him to suffer and if I would have tried to keep him a little longer it would have been for my sake and not his. I didn't want him to suffer, even for another day. I'm here if you want to talk but I understand if it's hard to right now.
God bless Su-Lin and Willow.

[SassyLassie]

April, I just now had my beloved dog, Su-Lin, put to sleep, the hurt is awful. I will keep you in my prayers. I would write more, but, I am really a mess right now myself.

[patzy]

Oh I know the pain at the loss of a beloved companion. Remember, Willow was fortunate to be so very loved. You are the one left behind to deal with the pain, Willow is free now and beyond suffering
Cry when you must, that is part of the healing. Keeping it inside only makes it worse and is not healthy for you. Grieve in any manner that eases the pain.  It helped me each time I lost one of my 'fur' babies,  to create a memorial. Could be Willow's picture with his toys around it, planting a flowering bush, taking a walk where you and Willow would walk or play.
My condolences.
Patricia

[Ghilly]

I'm so very sorry for your loss.   It's never easy to say goodbye, no matter how long they are with us.  When we take them to live with us, we make a promise to them to take care of them and to never let them be hurt, afraid or alone.  You kept your promise to
Willow.  He was sick and he was no longer enjoying life, and you performed the ultimate act of love for a pet owner, and that is to help them from this world when they are no longer able to live free of pain and suffering.  Keep him alive in your heart and he will always be with you.  Lonewolf has posted my favorite poem for you in memory of Willow.  Again, my most sincere condolencesn to you.

Ghilly

[Bon-Bon]

April.  I am so so sorry.  Oh my...I can feel the heartache...with tears.  I know and understand whole-heartidly.  Oh honey, you and your little one are in my heart and prayers.  

This is so very hard to go through.  It is just like when someone in our family passes on...the heartache is the same deep pain.  They are a part of our very being...a part of our family and blessings and always will be.  This is very much of what Willow means to you.  I feel safe to say the words "is" and "means"  because we know Willow "is" alive and GOD "means" well for Willow in Heaven, no death in Heaven.  

I believe whole-heartidly that both GOD and Willow wants you to not stay sad for too too long.  When Willow was living with you upon this Earth, he knew when you were sad.  Remember the look in his eyes regarding his concern for you?  I feel it is safe to say that both GOD and Willow feel no different about their love, concern and care for you now.

God Bless you April.  

God created and sent Willow to your family and you to Willow, to bless one another's lives abundantly and that is just what you both did.  Now, was Willow's time to be called home by our Father, The Creator of "All"; in order for Willow to partake in HIS great rewards for the job he was called and created to do and done very well in his life on Earth.

Just think, when we do get to meet our loved ones again, includes our pets, they will have so much to catch us up on.  The excitement will be tremendous!

Blessings and Pleasant thoughts for you this day and always.              

[HelpinUtah]

April:
I'm so sorry sweetie!  I know how difficult this is for you and I'm keeping you in my prayers!  I'm sending lots of love out to you and your family.  I know it's very difficult right now, but think of him running and playing in heaven and being like his youthful self.  I try to do that when I think of my cats I've had to put down.  It makes it easier.  But, it doesn't stop us from missing them!
My prayers are with you!
Hugs & Love,
Janet

[lonewolf07]

I am so sorry to hear about Willow.  Words can't convey how I feel.  Even though I didn't know him, I know how hard you worked to keep him happy.  This is going to sound crazy but Willow's spirit will always be with you and always watching over you.

I found this and maybe it isn't appropriate to post it here.  It was meant for humans but he was part of your family.

Hugs hugs and lots of prayers .... Natalie

DO NOT STAND AT MY GRAVE AND WEEP

Do not stand at my grave and weep,
I am not there, I do not sleep.
I am in a thousand winds that blow,
I am the softly falling snow.
I am the gentle showers of rain,
I am the fields of ripening grain.
I am in the morning hush,
I am in the graceful rush
Of beautiful birds in circling flight,
I am the starshine of the night.
I am in the flowers that bloom,
I am in a quiet room.
I am in the birds that sing,
I am in each lovely thing.
Do not stand at my grave and cry,
I am not there. I do not die.

Mary Elizabeth Frye (1904-2004)

[April2]

Thank you, everyone. It all happened so fast. I wish I could have had more time to just hold him and cuddle him. I wish I could have had an extra day to get used to this. But I didn't want him to suffer and he was so sick yesterday. He went downhill so fast, I was unprepared.
Jaybay, I have a feeling his kidneys may have been shutting down since he refused to eat and drink. He lost a lot of weight quickly too. And he seemed so weak yesterday, just laying around. I don't understand what the blood in the diarrhea meant either. I didn't want them to run a bunch of tests and put the poor dog through that and drag this out just for me to know what I already knew, that he was dying. At the rate he was going, I don't think he would have lasted more than a day or two. I know humans can only go about 3 days without water. I'm sure it's the same with animals.

I miss him already. I wish I could have had a little longer with him. I wish it hadn't been like this. I can't believe it's over.

[dominosarah]

Oh April i am so sorry about you losing Willow.  Lonewolf has been the one to tell us to look into their eyes and talk with them.  You are a wonderful pet owner and did what was right for Willow.  Hugs to you my friend........sara

[have 2 kids]

April- I'm so sorry.  
Most of us know how hard this is for you-  but remember you did what was best for him.
No more suffering.   He's happy now.

[peekawho]

I'm so sorry, April.  I cried simply reading your post.

Many hugs,
Peek

[PrettyKitty1]

I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, April. I know exactly how you feel. The little guy is in a better place now. God bless that little dog.

I'm sorry.....

[ginger899]

I don't know if it will be any comfort to you but take a look at my post on the thread "do you believe in spirits or ghosts" (thread started by Cherie72) on the Med Help Social community.
It was just after my husband died, and something that happened. Right at the end of my post....something about the dog. I don't have evidence that such a thing was true. But it was strange and inspired me with a different way to look at death. Maybe my husband was right.....

[babypooh]

I am truly sorry for your loss, my dear friend. May Willow rest in peace and go with God. Bless your heart. I know how much you love him. He is at peace now. *HUGS*

[Red931]

I am so sorry. I really thought you would have had more time. Keep him in your heart forever and he will never be gone.

God Bless.

[ginger899]

Bless you. It is so sad, so heartbreaking, but when you see that look, you know instinctively what to do. You know what they are 'asking' you to do.
And you listened to him.
This is the cross we bear for our dear friends, dogs. We know we will stand by them to the end, then bear the heartbreak for them. we give them that unspoken promise.

I am so sorry, your dear friend is no longer with you, but he is at peace now.
I have been crying too. It is a sad day.

[April2]

He's gone. I had him put to sleep. It was very quick and quiet. He didn't make a peep. I could tell he was so sick when I took him in because he just laid quietly the whole time and usually he gets so nervous about going to the vet. Someone told me to look in his eyes and that I'd know when it was time. His eyes looked tired and sick. I know I did the right thing. He's not suffering but this was so hard. I feel kind of numb. I don't think it's completely kicked in yet. I keep thinking I'm done crying and then I start again.

Thanks for caring, everybody.