Aa
Lost my best friend
Just so you all know I haven't been on for a few days because I lost my beloved Bailey. Bailey suffered with major immune issues and I was lucky to have worked in the field were i was able to get him the best care and medicine but even all of that couldn't help save him in the end. I knew it was time when he stopped eating, drinking, getting up to go out etc. I was blessed to have my boss come to my home and we peacefully but him to sleep right in my arms while I kissed and pet him. I am having a really hard time because I miss him so and my other dog is SO depressed! I have been trying to keep her busy with her regular routine and lots of walks to the park and rides in the truck but she is SO sad it breaks my heart. Any suggestions on helping her move past the grief?
"I had been through a lot with him after my 1st marriage ended and then it was just us for a while until I met my husband now."
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You will never forget Bailey, no one will fill his place. You already know that. I have had (still have) quite a few cats, and lost quite a few, and it's never easy. Some have been even more special than others. But my little cat Lemma who took such care of me in the first years after my husband died, so long ago when I was mostly alone with the babies and the cats, has a permanent home in my heart that never really heals over. Even now, I have tears as I'm writing about her.
You won't have another dog like Bailey, of course. They are all different, anyway, and once in a long while there's a Bailey or a Lemma who feels your need and meets it and loves you so much. In time, I'm sure you know, your other dog and your son will need a canine companion and he will be wonderful in a different way and be there for them, and it will help. When you can.
______
You will never forget Bailey, no one will fill his place. You already know that. I have had (still have) quite a few cats, and lost quite a few, and it's never easy. Some have been even more special than others. But my little cat Lemma who took such care of me in the first years after my husband died, so long ago when I was mostly alone with the babies and the cats, has a permanent home in my heart that never really heals over. Even now, I have tears as I'm writing about her.
You won't have another dog like Bailey, of course. They are all different, anyway, and once in a long while there's a Bailey or a Lemma who feels your need and meets it and loves you so much. In time, I'm sure you know, your other dog and your son will need a canine companion and he will be wonderful in a different way and be there for them, and it will help. When you can.
Every person grieves differently, different amount of time, different reactions...
I grieve terrible, not good at it, I thought I wanted to die when I lost mine...
It hurts so very bad....I got a new pet that kept me busy, b/c it was a puppy and puppies are demanding, really didn't want the pup, for, I was in mouring, but, husband did it anyway,,,I found out that the attention the puppy needed from me over time started the healing for me and my loss..Now, I never forget, never!!! But, my deceased friend I loved w/all my heart, and my friend loved me,,,,a love so great is good to share w/ another deserving dog...I now have another friend in my life that I now treasure who showed me that I can continue to live even in my grieving...
I sorry for you about your Bailey, you also got a bright and shining star in the night skies ever so bright, jumping and running, guarding the gates of heaven along side w/all the four legged friends of all of us....
It takes time, yes, it hurts, but, time does heal at some point, and memories are a good thing ...even if some of the memories are hurtful....better to have known the love of a good four legged friend than not to have known at all, b/c Bailey deserved the life that you gave him and Bailey knew your love....your pet knew you loved him, now, maybe another deserving pet will get your love again...
I grieve terrible, not good at it, I thought I wanted to die when I lost mine...
It hurts so very bad....I got a new pet that kept me busy, b/c it was a puppy and puppies are demanding, really didn't want the pup, for, I was in mouring, but, husband did it anyway,,,I found out that the attention the puppy needed from me over time started the healing for me and my loss..Now, I never forget, never!!! But, my deceased friend I loved w/all my heart, and my friend loved me,,,,a love so great is good to share w/ another deserving dog...I now have another friend in my life that I now treasure who showed me that I can continue to live even in my grieving...
I sorry for you about your Bailey, you also got a bright and shining star in the night skies ever so bright, jumping and running, guarding the gates of heaven along side w/all the four legged friends of all of us....
It takes time, yes, it hurts, but, time does heal at some point, and memories are a good thing ...even if some of the memories are hurtful....better to have known the love of a good four legged friend than not to have known at all, b/c Bailey deserved the life that you gave him and Bailey knew your love....your pet knew you loved him, now, maybe another deserving pet will get your love again...
wow so sorry for yur loss and your familys, my heart knows what it feels like just loseing my kizmoe in april of this year. it takes time all i can say and i still cry some days and not a day goes by that i dont think of him, we got another baby shes 14 weeks but she will never replace him, shes sweet i love her so much , but i look at her and things she does my kizmoe did to, so i think of him alot. just know you gave him the best home he could have and he was loved and knew it. God bless you and your family and remember all the great times with him. love and hugz Barbara
Thanks so much for your sweet words and advice :) I think in time we might get her a companion again but right now we are just glad that we all have each other to lean on. It was so sad today when my husband and I took our son and other dog to the park. You could see how we all felt lost without our Bailey boy being there. I truly felt in my heart that he wanted to go and was SO thankful that he did it in his own home with the love, respect and dignity he deserved. He will always be one of the greatest loves of my life. I had been through a lot with him after my 1st marriage ended and then it was just us for a while until I met my husband now. He saw me through many hard times and that is why I had to be there with him until the end. I was happy to give him the peace he was looking for. Thanks again for all your thoughtful words!
I can't stand it. Yet another loss in our community. :-( Your story of Bailey's end is a true tribute to your love for him. I so understand that issue rationally: you know you did Bailey a huge favor and that releasing him from suffering was a gift. I also understand the horror and even guilt of being the person who had to make that call.
When we lost Chica in January to renal failure, Hubby and I had the same problem. Our younger dog Maggie was left behind and in mourning. Honestly, I wasn't ready to bring another dog into our lives so soon, but Maggie made it clear she needed a companion.
Several weeks before Chica's death Hubby had made an application with a dalmation rescue group that was quickly approved. I was a bit po'd about it at the time, but it worked out for the best. Two weeks later, we took Maggie to meet some of the rescued dogs up for adoption. We had no intention whatsoever of adopting another dog that day. Out of 6 Dals up for adoption, Maggie paid no attention to the first five, but the 6th dog proved to be the one. Doc Holliday was in our home permanently the next day. I can't tell you what a joy it was to see Mags come back to life again with her new playmate. They're thick as theives now and in spite of some early issues over who was going to be where in the pack order, they get along beautifully. Doc helped us all survive Chica's loss and he is a well-loved addition to our family for his own sake as well as ours.
Not everyone can bring in another dog so quickly after such a loss. I sure never thought I could do so, but it made a tremendous difference. Maggie and Doc both kept me from sinking into the kind of despair that may have stopped me from ever having another dog again. I look at it as a tribute to Chica. She taught me that love always goes on, and to deny it is to deny life itself. Love is limitless. There is always enough to go around.
In your situation, listen to your other dog. Take her around to shelters or pet stores to see if she really clicks with another dog. There is no hurry or even obligation to actually adopt immediately, but making the effort is a big step in healing. Having another being to look after and care about really helped us all move forward, and I hope and pray it will work that way for you. :-)
When we lost Chica in January to renal failure, Hubby and I had the same problem. Our younger dog Maggie was left behind and in mourning. Honestly, I wasn't ready to bring another dog into our lives so soon, but Maggie made it clear she needed a companion.
Several weeks before Chica's death Hubby had made an application with a dalmation rescue group that was quickly approved. I was a bit po'd about it at the time, but it worked out for the best. Two weeks later, we took Maggie to meet some of the rescued dogs up for adoption. We had no intention whatsoever of adopting another dog that day. Out of 6 Dals up for adoption, Maggie paid no attention to the first five, but the 6th dog proved to be the one. Doc Holliday was in our home permanently the next day. I can't tell you what a joy it was to see Mags come back to life again with her new playmate. They're thick as theives now and in spite of some early issues over who was going to be where in the pack order, they get along beautifully. Doc helped us all survive Chica's loss and he is a well-loved addition to our family for his own sake as well as ours.
Not everyone can bring in another dog so quickly after such a loss. I sure never thought I could do so, but it made a tremendous difference. Maggie and Doc both kept me from sinking into the kind of despair that may have stopped me from ever having another dog again. I look at it as a tribute to Chica. She taught me that love always goes on, and to deny it is to deny life itself. Love is limitless. There is always enough to go around.
In your situation, listen to your other dog. Take her around to shelters or pet stores to see if she really clicks with another dog. There is no hurry or even obligation to actually adopt immediately, but making the effort is a big step in healing. Having another being to look after and care about really helped us all move forward, and I hope and pray it will work that way for you. :-)
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