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Avatar universal

I need to get it off my chest...

Last year I forced myself to vomit constantly - as often as I could. I decided for my own health I would stop - it's been a year, I've gained a lot of weight, I never in my life have been over 130 today I am 150 and gaining. I feel so disgusting. I want to lose weight in a healthy way, but I can't keep up w a diet or a workout. I constantly get these thoughts that it'd just be so much easier to vomit everything I eat - like I used to. I get so tempted to run to the bathroom and force myself to vomit. The temptation is so strong and awful, I'm slowly getting to a point where I may not be able to resist. The thing that holds me back is the thought that God made my body his temple in his image and it would be wrong and against his word to hurt myself in any way - this one included. The thoughts are just so demanding...
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Avatar universal
Feel like I won't be able to help much but,  I completely relate
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