31 year old with issues

[Mjohans9]

I’m wondering if I should see a specialist or if there’s something I can do on my own. I feel like it’s mostly in my head but I wonder if maybe there’s more to it. I didn’t have sex until I was 30 for religious reasons. However, I’ve struggled with it ever since. I get solid erections in the mornings and can have sex in the morning without problems. However, when I know I’m going to see my girlfriend I tend to worry about not getting an erection with her and I start to stress. So when things start to happen I get semi hard but not enough to have sex. Then I start to stress more and more and it doesn’t happen. It seems like if I don’t think about it then things go smoothly. But I tend to stress quite a bit about it so and the more I stress the less it happens.

It could be more than just stressing myself out so if anyone has suggestions please let me know. But I still get erections in the morning and if I’m not expecting sex and my girlfriend jumps me, it can happen. If it is just my own mind can anyone suggest how to get over it the anxiety of it all?

[GuitarRox]

To be perfectly honest, this sounds like stress induced ED.  It happens.  And you are not alone.  https://www.healthline.com/health/erectile-dysfunction-anxiety-stress#treatment  Do they have counselors where you are at?  I'd first, just to be safe, get a physical.  I would guess the findings will be that everything is normal. AT that time, mention the issues sexually with your girlfriend and ask about counselors that they can recommend.  This can be very effective at moving through anxiety.  They may teach you techniques to not overthink and talk yourself into being stressed when you meet with your girlfriend.  

[BonzoDog]

Excellent advice, GR - I would say pretty much the same thing. This is SO common - you can tell by the no. of Q’s about it here on MedHelp! When guys have this prblm, we tend to think we’re the only guy in the world having this issue! Stress is a killer for good sex, so the key is to get rid of the stress - especially self-imposed stress - and learn to relax...