Please Help- very lost

[bluebullygirl]

Hello, everyone. I am in need of advice and Im not sure if this will be seen or not. I am a 29 year old woman. I am very comfortable with my sexuality and enjoy sex, especially when it is with someone I care about. I was dating the most amazing man. We got along great, and I was falling in love with him. He was also 29, and in very good physical condition. The first time we attempted to have sex he was unable to get an erection. I attributed it to nerves. He would always initiate and he would feel me up also. Throughout the course of our relationship, everytime we had intercourse, he would atleast once or twice lose his erection. Just with intercourse it seemed. I began to think it was me, was I not tight enough?   It was on mind mind a lot and I began to make other observations. His sister was gay. No big deal. We hung out with her and her girlfriend and her ex girlfriend a lot. They had all been friends for a long time.Again, I thought nothing of it. Then we hung out with his coworkers, and they were also gay. Ok. I thought nothing of it. Then we got invited to a LGBT beach weekend called "sexacola" or "Pensacola pride". This is a huge lgbt weekend. I am not unaccepting of this, but I felt I would be uncomfortable in the environment. There is a lot of partying there. He really wanted to go with his sister and her friends. All of this was brewing in my head. I decided to gently mention his ED issue. He admitted he had had it for 2 years ( since 27) and had never sought help. He told me he thought it would go away because he liked me so much. I felt compelled to ask, and I did, if he was certain of his orientation. I also told him I would feel uncomfortable going to Pensacola pride, because I was not a member of the community and did not like the partying scene. His response was that " he was straight and wanted nothing to do with me" because I was "unaccepting and judgmental and obviously had insecurities I was internalizing"  he asked me if I was a homophobe, to which I said no. Because I am not.    This amazing man I was falling in love with then blocked me. I have tried to reach out and explain why I asked and reach out and apologize. I really liked him and even if he had ED, it did not negate from the fact that I still desired him and wanted to be with him. I am so lost and confused and feeling like I messed up a good thing. Can anyone offer me any insight into this situation??

[YardBull]

Your ex-boyfriend is close to the LGBT community, through his lesbian sister and socially with her friends and co-workers as well as events such as the beach gathering.  It sounds like you hit a nerve when you declined going to the beach weekend, as he seemed to overreact without trying to understand your reasons.  Otherwise compatible, he shut down your building relationship over this one disagreement.  It does make one wonder if he has been struggling with sexual orientation issues that would make him so sensitive, and that these issues are behind his ED problems.  Unless he allows an open discussion of your situation, it is difficult to get at the reasons for his behavior and ED.