So, yesterday I woke up and had something in my eye. Out of desperation (it was unpleasant, to say the least) I managed to coax the sonuvagun out by rubbing. ...UNFORTUNATELY, this rubbed my eye dry and it was too blurry to really see anything (for example, this message would be illegible unless I was covering it.)
However, I followed some instructions (artificial tears, washing it out, cold compress, etc, etc.) and it gradually got better. Although it's significantly better today, it's not completely 'fixed'.
Any help that doesn't involve an optometrist? (I just used another cold compress a few minutes ago and it seems to have helped.)