How Do I help her say Goodbye.....

[MYBROTHERSDEAD]

My brother passed away March 17 08...it's been about a year....I've seen my mother slip away little by little....she's on antidepressants, ativan you name she's on it....none of it helps...I put myself in her shoes....I have 3 little boys and to live life without one of them would be impossible....you see not only did she lose her son...she has no closure...cocaine addiction took his life....the details surrounding his death are unknown...just alot of lies and deceit from my father who was with him when he passed....I don't believe with the death of a child there's ever closure....you learn to live with it, my question is how can I help her or can I?

[alwayswithme]

Hi I know exactly how you feel I lost my best friend in the world that is my only brother he was 32 yrs old  my mom is very ill she doesnt move out of bed she has all medical depression problems,what makes me put 1 foot in front of the other is my 2 kids i have to i hate when people say i oh it gets better,or greiving,or closure i tell them there is no such thing the word i tell people is im trying my hardest to except my brothers passingso the word is excepting. trying how to except you will never forget, and it stays the same way and closure i dont even have  a statement for that one. i wanted to tell you quick and when i hear from you ill tell the rest because im getting tired its really late how i deal with my brothers passing is i go to see a mediumthey contact the other side ....trust me on this one was very good,im so sorry that i have to go i cant even see,i hope to here from you  ill always be here for youyou ever want to talk at any time im hear we are here for eachother ,goodnight ALWAYSWITHME ,

[Judy246]

All you can do is be there for her and she will talk when she is ready. There is no way around this one and a Priest did uplift my 84 yr. when he said to me "I'm destroyed".  The grief process is very, very  difficult and I learned that everyone grieves differently. She is grieving her "child" regardless of age. I hope she is opened to grief support groups or on the internet there is a website for people who have lost a child called Compassionate Friends look into it and I hope she will privately share with them her grief, it really does help.

You are in my thoughts and prayers....Judy