my husband

[eddie1]

How can I survive without my husband who was also best friend???

[mjmiller]

My husband passed away on Sept. 12 2007, ....5 months ago today.
We were married 39 years. He was my soul mate, best friend, my reason for living.
jml 1986 said she had a hard time getting out of bed, I find I can't stay in bed over
2 or 3 hours at a time. I do more sleeping in my computer chair than anywhere.
Everyone has thier own way of grieving. But what we all have in common is the pain.
The unbearable pain. I had no idea I could hurt this bad.
  What get's me through the day is knowing I will be with him again someday and will
never be parted again.  God Bless You

[Jaybay]

Wow jml, you said it all.  I can't think of a thing to add except to agree with everything you described.  One day and one step at a time, give yourself permission to cry when you need to, but keep on moving along.  The time does come when the memories are a good thing instead of a traumatic thing.

[jml1986]

First let me say how sorry I am for your loss. Surviving is done one second at a time. The first year is pretty much a haze. You have things that keep you busy such as insurance, thank you notes, legal papers,  and believe it or not that helps because you are doing it for your husband and it keeps him close to you. Getting out of bed no longer will seem like something you want to do. It will become a chore. You will feel like you are alone in a crowd of people. You will be hurt because you watch other people go on with their lives after the funeral and yet you are still diing inside. How can they forget him so fast and you can't. You will want to talk about him but people will avoid you because they don't want to see you cry. Things that you used to laugh about will now cause you pain. Days will pass quickly because you will dread the day when you have to use the words, he passed away a year ago. As long as it is days or months it is okay, but when you say a year, it is for real. That is the day that you know for sure that he is not coming home. So, don't push yourself to try and get over him too fast because people think you should. It will come in time and one day, you will realize that you forgot to think of him. That will make you feel guilty but it is a normal process. So to answer your question, you just do because you have no choice. Please know that I am here if you need to talk.