Before making a mistake...

[SpaCat_84]

Hi everybody, hope you are doing all well. I think this forum is a great resource...

Here is my little history. I am currently living in the UK. I am spanish. Two weeks ago I met a wonderful welsh girl in a pub. I talked to her for a while and then I asked her number. We started dating each other 2-3 times per week or so. Everything was cool, normal I think. Yesterday I went to her house and we started making out/ snogging I think she was waiting for me to make the move for having sexual intercourse. But I never did that. I was scared even when I was planning to use condoms. I have read a lot about HIV and its transmission, etc...and the whole thing its so scary. Questions going through my mind like, what if the condom breaks?, and what about oral sex, both receiving and giving?, is it totally zero risk really?, make me hesitate  a lot now that I am aware about HIV...

She is 27, I am 24. I asked about her past relationships and she says she have had just a couple of boyfriends in the past, one of them lasting 3-4 years. I know that she has been travelling a lot in south america for tourism. Am I being paranoic?, What is the real risk here if I decided to have sex with her and the condom breaks?, or if I give oral sex to her and she gives me oral sex without using a condom?...

God bless you all, thank you for making time to read my post

Kind Regards,    

[diver58]

If she has not been active sexually for last several months and did not have many partners, it is a good idea to get both of you tested before making any move. I think you plan to go along with her for quite some time, therefore it is worth going for such kind of testing.You are not having any intention of "one night stand" kinda thing, Are you?

Unprotected sex between two uninfected partners is 100% safe because you can not give something which you do not have. This mode of sex is safe and without fear, once you are sure about each other's status.

[Ice_Man]

I think you have to seek help for your anxieties. The chances that you are going to get HIV from this girl are very small, and if you use condom like you are talking about the chances are zero. I think you are at more danger due to your anxieties then from HIV threat - maby a danger that you will live your live in scare and not even dare to have a family :0/
Nothing in live if totally risk-free anyways... Are you sure you can go to the shops? I mean you have to cross streets and that's pretty risky. Common .. ring the girl up!

[lostone08]

well the risk is as real as if you were to have sex with any other girl 1 in 1000 for vaginal intercourse and i believe but dont quote me and someone please correct me if im wring 1 in 20000 for oral but besides the fact in your case i would go with her and get tested together before intercourse then you know what your getting yourself into and what the real risks are if the condom breaks or if you have unprotected etc...