Aa
What's my risk?
I keep coming to ask this question, but duck out at the last minute out of fear. Let's see if I can do it this time ...
About ten months ago I got out of a bad relationship of two years. We had sex about once a month; it was only vaginal and more than half of the time was unprotected. He pulled out every time, but I understand precum can still carry disease.
I don't think he was ever tested for any STD, but he told me a bit of his sexual history: he had four or five relationships (a stray BJ throws this number off for me), at least one was a virgin when they got together, one cheated on him (but told him right after so I don't know if they did anything physical after that), and he is against "being used for sex" so I assume he only had sex with the women he was in a relationship with (BJ aside). I had to skip town to finally break it off with him, so I can't exactly ask him to re-verify any of this (or to get tested, which ATM I wish I could ask him to do).
He is white, male, in his early-twenties, and from the southern US. Has never done drugs, or had sex with a man (but I can't verify what his past partners have done).
I didn't have this fear until a couple of days ago when the idea popped into my head out of the blue. I don't feel any symptoms outside of a continuous post nasal drip (coughing, sore throat, white tounge), but two doctors have said "it's probably allergies" so I'll accept this conclusion.
I have an appointment with my GYN in a month so I'll ask her to check me for everything, HIV included. But, seeing as it's a month away, I'm still a nervous wreck.
My question is, how likely is it that I have it?
About ten months ago I got out of a bad relationship of two years. We had sex about once a month; it was only vaginal and more than half of the time was unprotected. He pulled out every time, but I understand precum can still carry disease.
I don't think he was ever tested for any STD, but he told me a bit of his sexual history: he had four or five relationships (a stray BJ throws this number off for me), at least one was a virgin when they got together, one cheated on him (but told him right after so I don't know if they did anything physical after that), and he is against "being used for sex" so I assume he only had sex with the women he was in a relationship with (BJ aside). I had to skip town to finally break it off with him, so I can't exactly ask him to re-verify any of this (or to get tested, which ATM I wish I could ask him to do).
He is white, male, in his early-twenties, and from the southern US. Has never done drugs, or had sex with a man (but I can't verify what his past partners have done).
I didn't have this fear until a couple of days ago when the idea popped into my head out of the blue. I don't feel any symptoms outside of a continuous post nasal drip (coughing, sore throat, white tounge), but two doctors have said "it's probably allergies" so I'll accept this conclusion.
I have an appointment with my GYN in a month so I'll ask her to check me for everything, HIV included. But, seeing as it's a month away, I'm still a nervous wreck.
My question is, how likely is it that I have it?
I have taken an Oraquick test and it came out negative. As I am someone who needs outside assurance before I believe anything, this is a good sign I don't have HIV, right? That once I get tested by my GYN it will also be negative, right?
2 Comments
I would cancel the GYN appointment and do a therapy session instead - focusing on why you mentally need to do more of the same testing after you already know you have no disease.
Testing negative means it is time to let go, but you are continuing the agony by procrastinating for unknown reasons.
Testing negative means it is time to let go, but you are continuing the agony by procrastinating for unknown reasons.
Sorry, all I wanted was to have confirmation that I am right, so I can continue to trust in something I have never had to do before.
I know why I'm still anxious, and I am in therapy for it.
But, thanks anyway. To the person who suggested the Oraquick test, it did help.
I know why I'm still anxious, and I am in therapy for it.
But, thanks anyway. To the person who suggested the Oraquick test, it did help.
COMMUNITY LEADER
If you are in the US, all major drug store chains carry the Oraquick home test. I know you said you have an appointment this week, but if you want a definitive answer now, you could do that. ANY test you take at this point will be conclusive.
Since you have been celibate for 10 months you can get a conclusive test done now. It is a good idea to ask any new partner to get a test beforehand, so you should do this anyway as a preparation for a future relationship.
Since you said you can't verify his past partners, you had a risk. It is unquantifiable without a test, so you may as well test to end your nervous wreck status, which is a pointless day by day agony to go through. All the analysis of your lifestyle and other people's statistics are a waste of time to think about, as it is totally dependent on who you were with.
Since you said you can't verify his past partners, you had a risk. It is unquantifiable without a test, so you may as well test to end your nervous wreck status, which is a pointless day by day agony to go through. All the analysis of your lifestyle and other people's statistics are a waste of time to think about, as it is totally dependent on who you were with.
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