Aa
Aa
A
A
A
Close
428886 tn?1217682034

I am freaking out!

I hope this feeling passes, but as of right this minute, I don't want to do this treatment thing anymore. I am so tired of being tired. I open my eyes in the morning and am instantly P*%ssed off that I am awake. This dang nagging cough that throws me into dry heaves is enough to make me want to slap someone. I am on the verge of walking off my job, of which I normally love. I don't know wheather to call a psychiatrist, doctor or local law enforcement. I am only 6 weeks into this and I really don't have any desire to feel this way for 5 more months. I may just be freaking out and will move passed this but right this minute I just want to walk down the isles of a car lot and bust out windshields.

Please someone, tell me this will pass without jail time.
20 Responses
Sort by: Helpful Oldest Newest
217229 tn?1192762404
WHAT?

You're blaming TX for this? You mean you're normally nice?

LMAO --- just kidding.

Lorazepam and Xanax worked for me.

When you feel those moods coming on - you go sit down in the other room.

TX IS CHEMOTHERAPY.

Would you expect a cancer patient to be full of energy? Would you expect a cancer patient to be going to work 40 hrs plus? PLUS keeping up their home --- plus keeping life totally together?

HELL FREAKING NO!!!

So why the heck are you demanding it of yourself?

You ARE taking a CHEMOTHERAPY to kill a disease.

HELLO????

I don't know what Doctors are thinking prescribing this stuff to people --- and NOT telling them to expect Chemotherapy reactions.

I mean --- how silly can the doctors get?

This stuff is hard core medication - meant to KILL a VIRUS that is LIVING ---- INSIDE --- the human body.

Not everyone has bad reactions... But there ARE bad reactions to be had.

So please... Calm down...

I can't promise it will get better.

But what I can promise is that each day - one day at a time - is much easier to take than looking far into the future.

Keep a journal.

Make plans for your END OF TREATMENT.

I have a PLAN FOR ONE YEAR FROM NOW... It's not big... It's just something special for me... (and the family) --- but it's a PLAN... and that's what is keeping me on my sights when things make me feel down.

Watch Happy Movies --- stupid comedies...

But write every day --- how you feel - what you're thinking --- and what you're feeling physically and emotionally.

We ALL so very much understand what's happening - and we send you tons of hugs and warm thoughts.

Keep on Keepin' on --- as long as you're physically able to and know that we're right here behind you.

talk to your doctor about extreme mood swings - or things that you cannot handle.

This TX can and DOES cause mental and emotional issues that CAN spiral out of your control --- so maintain a close contact with your doc.

Make sure you're eating healthy.

Find ONE happy thing each day.

Hugs,

meki
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Consider asking for some ativan - not an AD but great for anxiety.  It doesn't require a loading dose and you can take it or not as needed.  It gets me through those really bad days.

Freak out here any time, we all do it and we're all on your side.  Glad you're feeling better today.

jd
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Paula, I would also call GI and ask about ADs, I always have had a tough time with emotions on tx. They do help, more than they harm, normally I am very easy going.  There is no shame in it.

Hang in there! We are all rooting for you!

Deb
Helpful - 0
320078 tn?1278344720
Paula,


Great to see you having a much better day!  Its the WAVES, just know  we are here to help you through them!

Peace
Rita
Helpful - 0
428886 tn?1217682034
Wow, what a difference a day makes. My office manager even said when I walked in this morning that I LOOK better. I was in a full blown panic yesterday. I couldn't see past the nose on my face. The world even has a different glow to it today. Thanks for letting me FREAK out. I think I will still call the doc's office and let them know just in cased there is a new AD med or for if this happens again.

Thanks again!!!
Helpful - 0
179856 tn?1333547362
I never would have made it through treatment without the guys in here holding my head above water. After week 48 especially I had a melt down and I wanted to quit more than anything in the world. I tried to remember that this was temporary and once I came out on the other side it was over for good - but it wasn't easy.

Are you on an anti-D of any kind? If not I would ask the doc about taking something to help you get through mentally. It helped me a LOT.

Charm is right - treatment isn't easy and nobody said it would be but you CAN do it.  You just have to keep on keeping on one day at a time literally and pretty soon it wILL be over. it ***** but you can make it - you just have to make yourself.

I'm sorry there are no easy answers for this one.............tx ***** but it does work.
Helpful - 0
276730 tn?1327962946
Im doing 48 weeks and Im on week 34. Its been a ride! Very fatigued,riba rage, no hair, dry skin etc. But we knew this when we started it would be a challenge.
You can do this if you want to. Its not easy NO it isnt.
Its been a struggle everyday.....your not alone here.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
It sounds like your right on schedule with the riba rage, creepy ain’t it. Watch out for trigger words from co-workers and bosses, ya know the kind that tweak your last nerve but manage to contain under normal circumstances. Yup, I wound up in my old boss, bosses, bosses office, and thought I was a goner for sure. I feel for some, including myself (looking back) this was a challenge in it self for a time and it did subside in the coming weeks as the riba leveled out. The house, well forget a bout it, it suffered the most due to neglect, lol. Hang in there and just keep moving forward, you'll get through this unsettling time.

jasper
Helpful - 0
353348 tn?1209695437
Yes we hate to get out of bed , we cough all the time,
we feel like **** and snap at people we care about,
hard to breathe , worse when it gets hot,
can't sleep and type , type , type -
and for many it's worse
You hang in there for all of us
DONT QUIT / we aren't going to either!
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I have soooo been there. It's unbelievable, isn't it? In my case, things did get a bit more manageable from my low point. I'm now in week 24 of a 48 week regimen. I haven't repeated the few worst weeks.

For me one of the hardest parts is that you need to relearn almost everything about your day to day function: how to eat, how to sleep, how to get through the day. It's ridiculous. I'm so sick of drinking water I could barf.

But make sure you are on an antidepressant. And my doc told me they take 3 weeks to kick in, so even after I finally gave in and accepted one, it took a few weeks to feel better. The antidepressant doesn't make a lot of the symptoms go away, but it does help some of the helpless feelings. If you're not on one, it sounds like you should discuss this with your doc. The interferon affects receptors in the brain.

Good luck! People apparently make it through, although for me sometimes it seems hard to believe.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I know some people i dont like...im gonna send them your way.
Helpful - 0
405645 tn?1249701810
Sorry your feeling so rough. It will pass and then it may come back around, or it won't pass and everyone will hideing their cars from you...lol

I think my rage hit right about the six week shot also. I wanted to fire clients, I think I did fire my husband (we work together).. lol. I got the lowest dose of xanax. Now when I feel the rage coming on I can take one, still fuction at work and within 15 minutes I don't feel like my head is about to explode. Talk to your Dr. and ask him or her, then if he gives you something try it out at home first to see how you react to it.

For the exhaustion; I'm using Emergen-C. I take 2 a day. One in the morning then another about 2:30 or 3:00 when I'm starting to have a sinking spell. It really helps me, I think you can take as many as 4 a day. But once again talk to your GI, I took one of the packets in to my GI and let him read the ingredients.

For your house; well your doing this tx so you can live along healthy life, so you've got plenty of time to clean your house...lol  But seriously mine is making me crazy so when there is night I'm not sleeping and I feel like I can walk, I'll get up and do a couple of things. I was up the other night at 4AM mopping the floor. I dusted the living room last night. I can't do much at once, but if I do a little when I can the house is bearable...it's not all clean at once, but not so filthy I want to scream. On weeks that I have a harder time with the house and I can't do anything about it and a scream is on the verge I remember my xanax...lol

What ever you do don't quit!!!!!   I'm on wk 17, just found out last wk that I'll be doing 72. I own my business so I can't quit and I have more animals to clean up after then a intelligent person should have. It's just one day at a time, and sometime it's one minute at a time.

Take care and be Strong,  Ann
Helpful - 0
320078 tn?1278344720
Paulalynn

I have had days like the one you are having... i hated everything, treatment, coughing, itching, hair loss, trying to get ready for work, while scratching and putting on cream and then having my hair stuck to the cream and the my clothes stock to the rash, cream and hair.  I know you feel like you have no control of your life and in alot of ways you dont while on treatment.  My sides dicate what i can and can not do.


Just remember there are better days, look at my journals and you will see some bad days and some good ones.

I know it hard to not want to clean your house, but you may not be able to always do all you want,  When i started treatment i got someone to help clean the house, she came every two weeks.  Well that lasted 2 x times because since then my husband hasnt sold a car (works on commission only) my house is up for sale, and ya know what i am going to do about!! nothing i can do except go along with whatever gets dished out.

Now got take a cool shower, put on some cream and go to sleep early!  Tomorrow you may not feel AS bad!!!!

peace
rita
if ya want talk by phone message me
Helpful - 0
388154 tn?1306361691
I know what you mean saw this carton strip once when someone told Erwing the troll
why are you not finishing the food on your plate?
Think of all the starving children all over the world and he just made a loud burp and added, as if that should increase my appetite.

I will underline everything trin said you gonna make it girl hang in there.

ca
Helpful - 0
428886 tn?1217682034
I do try and rest as much as a full time job will allow. My house is out of control. I just have a real bad attitude today. At least I realize that. And hearing that I am lucky to only be doing 24 weeks doesn't make me feel any better when I am at 6 weeks. Thanks for answering back. I will just trust that this too shall pass and tomorrow is a new day.
Helpful - 0
388154 tn?1306361691
I´ve just checked your profile saw that your on the good stuff.

My doc said it differens between persons which one of the meds is giving most sx.
I didn´t belived that the only one I´ve heard that pegintron is easier is Bill1954.
he did 56 weeks on pegasys first tx and have now done 94 on pegintron.

I have a new theory and that is that the sx are worse when your liver are worse
either that or you get used to the meds.

Me my self i felt better physically then in 25 years after first tx though relapsed, and thats the only reason, I went back to hell  10 months after first tx, which I haven´t so far (only half hell some times)

the key to limit the tx sides, mood and everything is  to do as little as possible and rest as much as possible.

ca
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Come on - you can do this!!!  You're still young - just take some deep breathes and shake it off.  I'm 56 and work everyday and it does get rough at times but YOU CAN DO IT!!!   Most of us feel bad at one time or another.  I did notice my sx weren't as bad once I passed the 12 wk mark.  Get the rage under control with meds or meditation - find what works for you and incorporate it into your life.  You are one of the lucky ones - 24 wks - us geno 1's have to go the full 48 or even more!!!   It's a short period of time in your life to be inconvienenced but if you kill the dragon it is SOOO worth it.
Trin
Helpful - 0
388154 tn?1306361691
Sounds perfectely normal to me at least if you on pegintron instead of pegasys.
Which one your on, i did my first tx 24w on pegitron, now I´ve done 26w of 48w on pegasys cant compare it on the same day.

On pegintron  I was afraid of my own anger wanted to heart some people physically now i just wanna take there money LOL.

And you get periods of relief thank God.

take care and if you on the bad stuff maybe you can swift,

ca

Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Lay you up some bail money and go for it!  :-)
The windshields I mean.
It will pass...I'm sick of it too.  I know the feeling but yes, it will pass. I think that's the riba rage we've heard others speak of...
Hang in there gal!
Helpful - 0
29837 tn?1414534648
You should first call your doctor as an emergency call before you quit. Let him advise you. There may be a quick fix. This treatment is NOT pleasant for anyone. It is a suffering ordeal no doubt. I've gone through it 4 times and ready for a 5th. Think of the alternative if you stop...

Best of luck to you. Call your doctor now...

Magnum
Helpful - 0
Have an Answer?

You are reading content posted in the Hepatitis C Community

Top Hepatitis Answerers
317787 tn?1473358451
DC
683231 tn?1467323017
Auburn, WA
Learn About Top Answerers
Didn't find the answer you were looking for?
Ask a question
Answer a few simple questions about your Hep C treatment journey.

Those who qualify may receive up to $100 for their time.
Explore More In Our Hep C Learning Center
image description
Learn about this treatable virus.
image description
Getting tested for this viral infection.
image description
3 key steps to getting on treatment.
image description
4 steps to getting on therapy.
image description
What you need to know about Hep C drugs.
image description
How the drugs might affect you.
image description
These tips may up your chances of a cure.
Popular Resources
A list of national and international resources and hotlines to help connect you to needed health and medical services.
Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.
Herpes spreads by oral, vaginal and anal sex.
STIs are the most common cause of genital sores.
Condoms are the most effective way to prevent HIV and STDs.
PrEP is used by people with high risk to prevent HIV infection.