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179856 tn?1333547362

Did I totally Over React

My son and his friend (20) came in the house last night while I was busy making dinner etc (basically stressed to the max) and all of a sudden he is asking where my sewing kit is. I'm like what for since when do you sew? He said oh no I'm gonna pierce Jon's ears. Now I know this kid Jon is a huge pillhead and I dont know what else he does aside from that but I said no there is no way in hell you are putting needles into anybody in my bathroom - of course he couldn't understand why. I told him Look it took me years to get over hcv I dont know anything about this kid then you are going to poke holes in him, have blood droplets around and put those needles back into the kit?

He got so mad and told me that I was a crazy idiot that I wouldn't get hep again that way blah blah so we had a HUGE fight. Like seriously I almost threw him out.

I think I was more mad that once I had said why it made me uncomfortable and he didn't respect that and all I've gone through that is what got me really going.

So yes overreaction I admit but does anybody on here understand why I'd feel like that?  Would you?

It's hard being so paranoid about things but I just am. I just want to keep that one little stage of my liver that i have left and do not want to take any chances even if they are totally irrational and yes of course I know I wouldn't get it back that way..............duh................

Just feeling bad today over the argument I guess.
Best Answer
92903 tn?1309904711
Are you sure it was the ear? Maybe that's what has him a little testy. Some times it's hard not to be a hot head, but don't worry you're not the first parent to pull a boner. Just try not to give him the shaft next time he asks.  

http://tinyurl.com/4zatx5m

Hey Annie!

28 Responses
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250084 tn?1303307435

  During the stressful days of 2-3 jobs supporting my 3 sons, sometimes I would 'blow up' over something (and they were really pretty good kids, I was lucky), but still they had done something not allowed soooo, I said many times...within @ 40 minutes.....' How I reacted was wrong, my temper got the best of me and I'm sorry for HOW I handled that, BUT, you are still in trouble so now lets handle that". I thinks it's OK for a parent to apologize when they don't react or behave 'well', which DOES happen.

On your subject tho (how old is he Deb?) absolutely agree that at NO time should ANYONE be self piercing or sticking needled into anyone, period. It is very cheap to get that done these days, hygienically! In fact just yesterday my son and I were talking to my 'foster' son, just dx'd with Hep C and I said I could have even gotten from when a girlfriend and I pierced our own ears and we shared that needled when I was 16 ( and that I'll never really know for sure where I got it, as he's beating himself up on how he got it, trying to determine that). If you lost your temper because he argued with you, I understand that frustration on 'didn't you SEE what I just went thru and don't you realize the ways this can be transmitted? If your feeling bad on the yelling part, perhaps apologize for that reaction (and him if he did too!) and say 'now we ARE going to discuss all this" and do.
  As Mary say, we are reckless, especially when young, he needs a refresh on this, if he didn't learn it thru your battle.

  Your a GOOD mom tho :)
Helpful - 0
475300 tn?1312423126
Deb, you never over react.  I have to agree with all you say!!!!
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374652 tn?1494811435
did you read the post by the young woman who contracted hep c from a homemade tatoo?  I dont think you over reacted.  We are a reckless species
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92903 tn?1309904711
Z'actly. Who pierces their *ears* anymore?
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1117750 tn?1307386569
piercing your ears with a needle ? how 1980's !
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92903 tn?1309904711
"The trick to dealing with kids of that age is remaiing calm"

The trick to dealing with kids of that age is knowing what the H is going on. Next time you're passing the courthouse, tell him you need to pay a parking ticket. Make him go in through the metal detector with you and see if he sets anything off once he's taken the change out of his Levi's.

C'mon, you want to know if he's packin' more hardware than the good lord gaveth.And so do we. Or not.

Helpful - 0
163305 tn?1333668571
When I had my ears pierced that way, at the age of 14, I didn't ask anyone, I just did it.

The trick to dealing with kids of that age is remaining calm. You just tell them the way it is, turn your back and continue cooking dinner.
I know, easier said then done.
Don't fret, he'll get over it.
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92903 tn?1309904711
I already caught it. Then I got rid of it. Good thing too - damn thing was starting to cause problems.

Refrigerators, viruses, and wives. They sure are alike.  
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Avatar universal
Don't ya think you better go catch it?
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92903 tn?1309904711
Uh, yeah. Why?
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Avatar universal
We used to ???

Hey goof is your refrigerator running?
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92903 tn?1309904711
So true. We used to call the butcher to ask of they have pigs feet. Now the kids call the baker to ask if they do cream puffs.

"Well clean yerself off and pull up 'cher pants when yer done."
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Avatar universal
Lol...Isobella...I say....ewwww and WTF???!!   :)
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412873 tn?1329174455
You so did not overreact.  I would have been the same way.  Especially the part about not appreciating what you went through during tx.  That was the one big fight my daughter and I ever had.  

You've done your part by trying to apologize to him.  He'll call when he needs something and by then enough time will have passed that you won't even mind giving him money =)

Goofy:  My how times have changed from the days of making prank phone calls about Prince Albert in a can..................ewww and ouch.

Isobella
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223152 tn?1346978371
goof, I do believe you are getting more deviant with time.  How special for NY to award you with the best answer

frijole
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475300 tn?1312423126
I just saw this and I would have done the same thing.  

Stuff like this reminds me of the day my dog caught my arm instead of the toy and when someone brought me a bandaid I was very loud saying DON'T TOUCH MY BLOOD.......I was SVR at the time.  

I want more tattoos but am afraid and too broke right now anyway LOL
Helpful - 0
374652 tn?1494811435
I never did have any kids,  but I thought if I did I would duct tape them and take them to some small town somewhere and not lose sight of them until they were old enough to take care of me.  I worked as a deckhand on a ferry once and the lead deck hand was on old timer, as soon as his kids could walk they had jobs and they took care of the farm, they didn't have time to get into trouble.  I would not have made a good mother.  I would have been a dictator.  
I stand with telling your kids what to do. not the other way around
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190885 tn?1333025891
it's funny how this forum gives us a safe place to come where we all have this hep c in common...and in that way understand and respect each other...you'll be fine and right back on track with your son soon......billy
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Avatar universal
I don't know how to characterize your reaction.
I just know I would have reacted the same way.

Mike
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751342 tn?1534360021
You totally did NOT overreact! Boy, this brings back memories of me piercing my own ear (yes, only one...it was probably 1976 and having one side with more holes than the other was just coming into vogue) with a needle and an ice cube. Good to see you still on here, not that I thought you wouldn't be!
Helpful - 0
1477908 tn?1349567710
I can't stand it when one of my kids and I have an all out. I always feel that something will happen to them and I'll never have the chance to say "I love you" again. But sometimes there needs to be a cooling down period for all involved. I found, for me and mine anyway, that an email helps me to express my feelings in a less confrontational way, letting me place my words out of concern rather than fear and frustration (as I always seem to do initially). Then time for them to digest it and hopefully respond in kind. It usually works for us  - at least to clear the air. My daughter is a screamer and I absolutely can't deal with it, so this is much better for both of us - she can yell and I can't hear. :-)
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Avatar universal
The same scenario would have occurred in my home if my son had wanted to pierce a friend's body part in my home...over my dead body!  It's not just for you and your son's safety but for the friend's too.  

My youngest son (27) is "addicted" to getting tattoos and I have the same feeling every time he gets another one..."OMG, is this the time he gets infected with HCV or something else..." and that's even though he goes to a regulated, well-known tattoo parlor.

Let him be mad.  He owes you an apology for calling his mother a crazy idiot...period.
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1253246 tn?1332073310
Sure you feel bad since hes not answering his phone,maybe you should not take any of his calls either.Dont apologise for your feelings!!!!When he needs money tell him you dont have it.I have 2 stepchildren that are always borrowing money and they dont come around unless they NEED something!!!!Not happening anymore-my husband hasnt seen hisngrandson in 2 years and they only live 20 minutes away.Sometimes you have to put a firm foot down!!!Play the game with him-I would cindy
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545538 tn?1295992017
I'm sure when he needs to "borrow" money he'll facilitate a reapproachment. Its amazing how flexible their stubborn nature is when they want something. That's certainly the only time I hear from my 23 year old son...when he wants something.
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