Breakout caused by sex & transmission?

[M112233]

Had sex last night (oral performed on me for about 15mins prior to sex - vaginal intercourse, no protection lasted 5mins maybe), today I feel a slight itch in one spot on my labia majora, and slightly red around that area. No visible lesion, could just be irritation from oral/my partners end-of-day stubble. I know I am a little raw/sore in the opening of my vagina from the lengthy oral performed first and then sex immediately after. I was very well lubricated naturally between my own “wetness” and his saliva from oral.  However, worried the oral or vaginal sex caused shedding, or a breakout is coming. I take acyclovir daily, religiously.

My question is - if that’s the case and the act “awakened” the virus, are chances of transmission high from that sexual act? I am HSV+, my partner is an HSV- (as far as we know), male.

[Believer20]

That depends highly on your outbreak frequency since/when you take medicine. I'd imagine this is friction-based because that's just how sex is, and considering how much time it took, it is probably fine. If your partner has symptoms within 5.5-2 weeks from now, go to the doctor. If not, you're good to go.

[M112233]

I was married to someone with HSV-1 orally for almost 5 years, divorced early 2013. Started dating second husband shortly after (within a month or two), blisters popped up and I was swab tested positive for herpes (not sure which type) June 2013. Figured I got it from who I was dating since I had been with my first husband for so long and never had symptoms. New partner had never had an outbreak, never been tested. We never got him tested either, we just assumed.

Fast forward to 2018, I’ve had 3 outbreaks in 5 years, only on daily suppression for about 6 months now (only took Valtrex before when I had an outbreak). In reading the herpes handbook, I’m hoping the type I have is HSV-1 due to the few outbreaks I’ve had, but I’m going to request a type test when I go for my next annual female exam.

[auntiejessi]

Ohhh get a type specific IgG blood test, like yesterday. If your ex had cold sores frequently, and performed oral on you, you could have hsv1 genitally, and it's important that you know what type you have because the shedding rates are really different.

I can't remember if you've said your current partner has been tested or not. He needs to be, including for hsv1. He could have hsv1 and not ever had a cold sore.

Shedding doesn't decrease over time or because of fewer outbreaks, but your meds do decrease shedding, so you don't have to worry so much about that. (You don't have to worry so much about any of this, really lol.)

Please read the Herpes Handbook I linked the other day if you haven't already. :)

[M112233]

If the type I have is type I, could it have taken 8-12 months for me to ever have an initial outbreak?

[auntiejessi]

Yes, it could have. Some people never get an outbreak with either type of herpes.

[auntiejessi]

If the oral caused an outbreak, chances are you wouldn't transmit during the act. Also, keep in mind that oral hsv2 is rare. Hsv2 doesn't really like the mouth area, and if it did transmit, it would likely result in one outbreak ever, and rarely shed.

Have you read the Herpes Handbook yet? Is this your first relationship since getting herpes? I really hope you can get to a place where you aren't so worried about this. :)

[M112233]

Me too!!!! I believe I acquired it from my ex husband. I found out I had it when we were dating. Still to this day, he has never had an outbreak. My husband previous to him had cold sores frequently, but I never showed any signs of contracting it from him.

I have been with two other people sexually since my most recent divorce. Both relationships were maybe 4-6 months long, sex once every one or two weeks. Neither acquired herpes from me, that we know of. Protection was not used with either of them, and I was not on daily suppressive therapy, just kept Valtrex in case I had an outbreak. Which, I’ve only had three in 5 years. My current partner and I have oral sex most....vagina sex at least once a week, sometimes more. I’m trying to rely on my own knowledge of my body and daily therapy to reduce the risk of transmission. We’ve tried condoms and threw those out the window after the first two times haha.

Even though my partner and I are serious and monogamous, I don’t want to be the girl who gave him herpes. We aren’t married, no talks of it since I’ve been married twice and don’t reallt have an interested in getting married again, so I let the thought of “we might not be together forever” overtake sometimes.

I’m sure I sometimes tingle and itch because I’m just worrying too much and it’s all in my head.

I’ve also said before that I have HSV-2....I do not know that it’s type 2. I was diagnosed via swab test 5 years ago, but I don’t remember getting blood tested, let alone type tested. I’d like to think I don’t shed much since I have had so few outbreaks before taking daily therapy, and I’ve had it 5 years now. But as soon as I get raw or once glimmer of an issue, I freak out thinking my partner could get it and I just don’t want him to.

I know I’m rambling, but it makes me feel better to talk to someone who gets it! :-)

[M112233]

If this is an outbreak caused during oral or vaginal, what are the chances that outbreak caused transmission to my partner during that same vaginal sex act?

We’ve been having sex since mid December and he’s never shown any signs of contracting from me, which I know he could get it and not show signs, but I’m hoping we’re one of those successful discordant couples. The second I feel uneasy though, it kills my hope :-/

[M112233]

I have read some of the herpes handbook, but not all. I’ve read the section about transmission, yes.