Aa
Can a cold sore give give herpes?
Im really confused on how cold sores work. For example, my boyfriend and I are virgins and we havnt ever slept with anyone we are our first ever but he often gets cold sores so when he does should I avoid kidding him ?
COMMUNITY LEADER
Cold sores are caused by herpes simplex virus 1, or hsv1. Many, many people have this. About half the adult population has it. Most will get it in childhood, from a relative kissing them, usually, and 90% will never get a cold sore, so they don't know they have it.
When he does have a cold sore, you should definitely avoid kissing him. He can kiss your cheek, but shouldn't kiss your lips. The skin on your cheek is thick enough that you won't get infected that way, but the skin on your lips is thinner.
I don't know how sexually active you've become, or plan to become, and you don't have to tell me, but you should also know that if he gives you oral sex, you could get genital herpes type 1 from him. This is quite common, and about half of all new genital herpes infections are the result of oral sex.
He can transmit it without a sore, too, because of something called asymptomatic viral shedding. This is where the virus is active on the skin but he has no symptoms. With oral hsv1, this happens about 25% of days per year.
If he is getting a lot of cold sores, he should talk to his doctor about taking a medication like valtrex every day. This will help prevent the cold sores, and also reduce the shedding, and reduce transmission.
This may all sound scary, but in some ways, you are safer with someone who knows they have this. He knows what a cold sore feels like when it's coming, and can avoid kissing you then. Someone who doesn't know they have it doesn't know when to avoid kissing or more.
If you like him, this shouldn't be a reason to leave him, since the next guy you date has a really good chance of having it, too. I always say that herpes (either oral or genital) isn't a good reason to leave a great relationship, or a good reason to stay in a bad relationship.
It's up to you, of course. :)
Let us know if you have any questions.
When he does have a cold sore, you should definitely avoid kissing him. He can kiss your cheek, but shouldn't kiss your lips. The skin on your cheek is thick enough that you won't get infected that way, but the skin on your lips is thinner.
I don't know how sexually active you've become, or plan to become, and you don't have to tell me, but you should also know that if he gives you oral sex, you could get genital herpes type 1 from him. This is quite common, and about half of all new genital herpes infections are the result of oral sex.
He can transmit it without a sore, too, because of something called asymptomatic viral shedding. This is where the virus is active on the skin but he has no symptoms. With oral hsv1, this happens about 25% of days per year.
If he is getting a lot of cold sores, he should talk to his doctor about taking a medication like valtrex every day. This will help prevent the cold sores, and also reduce the shedding, and reduce transmission.
This may all sound scary, but in some ways, you are safer with someone who knows they have this. He knows what a cold sore feels like when it's coming, and can avoid kissing you then. Someone who doesn't know they have it doesn't know when to avoid kissing or more.
If you like him, this shouldn't be a reason to leave him, since the next guy you date has a really good chance of having it, too. I always say that herpes (either oral or genital) isn't a good reason to leave a great relationship, or a good reason to stay in a bad relationship.
It's up to you, of course. :)
Let us know if you have any questions.
3 Comments
Is it still a risk even if the cold sore is going away?
And also We havnt had sex because we’re virgins and want to wait for the right moment. He does try to finger me but i don’t know if it a risk for herpes either?
Yes, it is still a risk if the cold sore hasn't totally gone away.
Fingering is not a risk for any STD, including herpes.
Make sure you both are completely ready before doing any of this. It's always totally okay to say no, and that you both need to respect each other's boundaries and limits.
It's great that you are asking questions about this and becoming informed first. :)
Fingering is not a risk for any STD, including herpes.
Make sure you both are completely ready before doing any of this. It's always totally okay to say no, and that you both need to respect each other's boundaries and limits.
It's great that you are asking questions about this and becoming informed first. :)
Have an Answer?
You are reading content posted in the Herpes Community
Herpes spreads by oral, vaginal and anal sex.
Herpes sores blister, then burst, scab and heal.
STIs are the most common cause of genital sores.
Millions of people are diagnosed with STDs in the U.S. each year.
STDs can't be transmitted by casual contact, like hugging or touching.
Syphilis is an STD that is transmitted by oral, genital and anal sex.
