Varicella is the chicken pox. That's probably not happening to you. Varicella can cause shingles if you've had the chicken pox, but that's a skin disease, not internal.
You can get internal outbreaks of hsv 1 or 2 if you have those genitally, but they it's not "deeply embedded", and they would heal and you'd feel better.
What makes you feel like this is what's happening to you?